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My daughter and I are in need of finding a place of our own. These past couple months have been extremely hard because of the death of my mother. We were all living together and my mom was splitting the rent with me and I was working to take care of her. She was sick with Cancer and she had the operation and we all thought she was going to be okay. She did not recover like we expected and she ended up going in a Rehabilitation Center and we visited her often until she came home. I am the youngest of her children. I have 3 brothers and 1 sister and we are called the Berry 5. We were allways known as the Berry Family from the time we were little. My mom started to do better and we were so happy to have her home. It came time for her to Start Chemotherapy and Radiation. She was scared but I and my sister talked her into it because we knew the doctors had told us that she needed it because the cancer had spread to her lymp nodes and when they did the surgery they were not able to get everything. My mom had done one week of Radiation and she went in for one session of Chemo. The same day she had Chemo she seemed fine and then 2 days later she was having fevers, throwing up and so extremely weak. I thought it was because of the Chemo because that is what was explained to us. My concern was she couldn't keep anything down. I needed to give her medication for her Diabetes and High Blood Pressure but everytime I gave her anything, it all came up and so I was so scared because her blood sugar was high and I didn't want it to get any higher. She began to complain of stomach pain and I thought it was another side effect of the Chemo. For a couple days of her vomiting and having diarrhea, I was able to get some fluids down her and it seemed to stay. Little by little we both thought she was doing better. Her strength was not there though, it was difficult for her to even get up to go to the bathroom. The following day she continued to vomit and I was scared so I told her she needed to go to the hospital, because I felt that they could help her more. They could give her medications through an IV and they could find out why she was so weak and everything. She was scared and did not want to go but I convinced her. The ambulance came and took her to the hospital. I tried to follow her but I had to pick up my 11 year old daughter from school. I did go and they would not let me go back right away. I told them my mom had been brought in and they told me she wasn't checked in yet. About 20 minutes passed and I went back up to the window and they told me they would see if the doctor would let me back there and they were saying my daughter couldn't come back there because she wasn't 14, I told them she is only 11 years old and I'm not leaving her in the waiting room with strangers and that she was coming back there with me. They finally let us in and we went back to see my mom. I couldn't believe they had her hooked up to so many machines and she was on morphine and so out of it. I walked up to her and I said Ma, I'm here and she turned and looked at me. She was happy to see me, but then she told me that they told her, they found blood in her stools. I told her it was probably just do to her Hemorrhoids. but she said they told her it was positive for something. I asked her for what and she didn't know. I began looking for the doctor so I could ask questions but he wasn't around and everyone I talked to told me the doctor would be in soon to go over my mom's condition. I stayed with my mom, just holding her hand, telling her I loved her and that she was going to be okay. They came in to take her to have an ultrasound and my daughter and I waited. The doctor finally came in and told me that my mom had an abcess in her stomach that had burst. I said what are you talking about? He said that she had a condition called peridonitis and that the abcess burst and was releasing all this poison inside her stomach and her blood pressure was dropping dramatically. He then told me it was too dangerous for them to operate at that time because her INR level to to high. My mom had been taking Cumadin for a blood clot that she previously had and the cumadin made her INR level extremely high and her blood was not clotting so they said if they did surgery, she would bleed out. They said they needed to correct it by giving her lots of blood products and they gave her all kinds of strong antibiotics and blood and plasma. They were pumping so much stuff into her, I didn't know what to do. Her blood pressure was like 85/60 and then like 76/40 and it was getting lower and lower. They had her hooked up to so many IVs and then they told me that she was the sickest person they had in the ER. So many doctors and interns and students and nurses overcrowded my mom's room. I called my sister and told her what was going on and she came down to be with me and my daughter. They told us they would do all they could for my mom but that it didn't look good. I began to pray, my mom had always taught me to pray and give things over to god. As the night went on, they decided to put an IV in my moms neck, they said it was more direct and if and when she went to surgery it would be better to have that in place. They made us leave the room and they had like 10 people in there with there machines and cameras and equipment to help guide them where to put the IV at. I had never gone through this before and I was so scared but I was keeping my faith. One doctor wanted to talk to me and my sister alone and I didn't want to hear him telling me anything negative. He asked us a lot of questions concerning my mom's health and history. He then told us that she was in acute renal failure and that her colon was damaged where the abcess bursts and fecal was being released into her abdomen. This is the last thing I wanted to hear. I asked him if they could fix it, he said they would do all they could but that their main focus was trying to bring her INR levels down because they were dangerously high. She was also anemic and that is why she was so weak, her blood level was extremely low. They were continuously giving her blood products, antibiotics and plasma. My sister decided to take my daughter home with her. I told her I would call her when I knew when they were going to do surgery. The surgeon had spoken to us and said that it was a good chance, and that operating was her only chance and once her blood level was corrected that they would go in and repair the damage. I felt some what relieved but as the night went on she was in a fight for her life. The main doctor working on my mom's case came and told me that her breathing was not getting any better and that he needed to put her to sleep so he could intubate her and put a breathing tube down her throat. He said it would be good to have anyways so that she would be ready when they went to surgery. There was nothing I could do except walk out of the room and wait. I continued to pray and wait and pray and wait. Hours went by and I would walk and peek inside the room and see my mom's blood pressure increasing some, this gave me hope but then the doctor would come and tell me it wasn't looking like she was improving and that we needed to prepare that she might not make it through the night. i couldn't believe what he was telling me. I called my sister and my brother and told them , they were praying as well. I didn't know who to listen to, one doctor is telling me it's hopeless and the surgeon is telling me it's a good chance she would be okay once taken to surgery. I sat in the hall because they wouldn't let me back in and they stayed with her at all times, monitoring her and giving her medicine and all the blood and stuff back to back. Then they came out in the hall and told me they were ready to take her to surgery. They said she might not hear you but you can still talk to her. I walked up to her lying there, so still and I told her how much I loved her and i told her to fight and that we would do it togther and that I would be here when she woke up and that I was not leaving her. The surgeon put me in the OR waiting room. I was all alone in there by myself. I waited and waited and only 20 mins went by and a security guard told me there was a cafe there and if I wanted to go grab a cup of coffee that I could. I went downstairs and got the coffee, as soon as I reached the OR floor I saw the surgeon standing there, he walked over to me and he said, I'm sorry but your mom's heart stopped during surgery and we revived her but then it stopped again and he said I don't we can get it back. My whole world just crumbled, I began screaming and crying and I fell to the floor. I was just askig God why. Why is this happening? This security lady came over to comfort me and began telling me how sorry she was and asked me if I had any family I could call. I called my sister and told her and she said she was on her way down. She lived in another city about 45 mins away. I was still on the ground just broken and this lady began to tell me that God would help me and give me the strength to go on. She asked me if I had any children, I told her I had a daughter, and she told me I needed to be strong for her. I wasn't trying to hear all that. My whole world was ripped right from under me. A couple of doctors and this lady helped me off the floor and the surgeon that came out , came out again and told me they would take me back to see her. They brought out a wheelchair and wheeled me back there and when they opened the door, my god I just saw them on top of her doing chest compressions and I was just screaming and then the surgeon is telling me I need to make a decision because everytime they do that, they are hurting her and he said, you don't want her to suffer anymore. I was just waiting on my sister4. I didn't want to make that call but I didn't want them pounding her chest in so I told them to stop. It killed in me inside. They wheeled me over to her and I just cried. My mom was only 60 years old and she had her whole life ahead of her and I don't understand why any of this happened. She was such a beautiful person and she had been a christian for 33 years. SHe loved the lord and she raised me and my siblings up in the church. I couldn't believe that she was gone because I had prayed and prayed and I just knew that God would spare her life. I lost my real father at the age of 16 and even then I didn't know him. I always had my mom and she remarried when I was 11 years old. She had been married for 19 years and my step father passed away in July of 2008. He was a sickly person and she took care of him and nursed him for all those years. He had diabetes, high blood pressure, prostate cancer, he was on dialysis for kidney failure, he had a four by pass surgery and he was in and out of the hospitals for years. She suffered so much seeing him suffer and taking care of him, he took what little strength she had. But because he was her husband she did all she could to help him and she loved him so much. So now all remains is just me and my siblings. It's hard because my mom was my best friend. I can't remember a time when she wasn't around. We did everything together and we lived together for years and I took care of her. I wanted so bad for her to be okay and to make it through surgery, I had been taught for years about the love of Jesus and I couldn't understand what he chose to take her away from her children and grandchildren. We had a two bedroom apartment and she had her room and my daughter and I shared a room. After she died, I went home that morning with my sister and I stayed over there for the remainder of the day. The whole day was just hurting, crying and calling the rest of the family. I felt so bad because my youngest brother, say youngest because he is the youngest of my 3 brothers, even though they are all older than me. He came to the hospital to see my mom but he thought she was still alive and the doctors didn't tell him, they let him in the room and she was already covered up and he walked in and was like, it's over ?? he couldn't believe it , he just broke down. One of the nurses that was in the OR called my sister and he was crying, apologizing to us because he thought my brother already knew. He told us how sorry he was. Now my family is broken, my mom was the rock that held us all together. We didn't have money growing up, we didn't have a lot of the finer things in life but we had love. She loved us like no one could. She did it all for her children and most importantly she taught us about God. She lived her life for Jesus, she would pray on a regular basis, read her bible daily, go to church often as she could and when things looked hopeless she took them to god in prayer. She prayed not only for her children, grandchildren and siblings but for people all over the world, she would pray for all the countries and for the sick and homeless and anyone she could pray for. She gave over the years endlessly to Trinity Broadcasting Network, Feed the children, CBN, David Terrell Ministries, Boys Town, Children International, Food For All and to so many others. Month after month, year after year she was giving. She taught us how to give and there were times when we would just make food and take it to the park to give to the homeless, bottled water, sandwiches, noodles, chicken or whatever we could. She would never turn down a person needing help or asking for spare change, she would give freely. She would tell me all the time, it's better to give than to receive and that god would bless me. So I began giving as well, I would call and donate and try to help whenever I could. My mom was also a big giver to the goodwill. Over the years we gave so much, and everytime they would ask if we wanted a donation paper for a tax write off she would say no. she didn't want that, she was giving freely and she didn't want anything in return. That's who she was, she was the person who would mentor you and talk to you about Jesus and how over the years he brought her and our family through so many trials and tribulations. SHe praised god for everything, for the good times and the bad. She used to always tell me to be thankful and to praise god. Now there were times when i was suffering so much and I didn't want to praise god, I wanted god to help me and at the time it seemed like he wasn't. My mom was always there to tell me baby, hold on.. give your burdens over to the lord and he will help you and supply all your needs. I realized that he did just that. I remember when she had surgery for the cancer and she was wondering why god allowed her to come down with that. It was hard for her because her faith was shaken then. She couldn't believe after she was faithful to him for so many years that he would allow her to suffer so horribly and there my sister and I were telling her that she would be okay, that God loved her still and he had not forsaken her and that he would bring her through this. She was so discouraged at the time but we would not let up. She couldn't believe this was her children mentoring and encouragiing her as she had done for us over the years. She told me, she was happy and she felt relieved that her living and everything she had taught us was not in vain. She was thankful to God that we were listening to her and by example we followed her footsteps. She began to get better and we thought she would be okay. My mom was a pure Christian, she didn't drink, didn't smoke, didn't do drugs, didn't curse. She would make you turn the tv channel if you were watching something that cursed. She loved her cowboys though. Her favorites were Bonanza, The rifle man, High Chapparal, Wagon Train, The Virginian and so many others. She also loved the old shows, the clean shows, the original dennis the menace, columbo, family affair, petticoat junction, I married joan, hawai five o, the streets of san francisco, i spy, murder she wrote, in the heat of the night, matlock, the big vally, dr quinn, little house on the prairie, family ties, good times, 227, what's happening, the jeffersons, the brady bunch and so many others. Her favorite game shows were The price is right, deal or no deal, let's make a deal, the newlywed game, match game and who wants to be a millionaire. I loved spending time with my mom, she was someone I could always talk to and she would never judge me, she would tell me how much she loved me and how proud she was of me. She taught me how to carry myself as a lady and she taught me how to stand up for myself and I owe her so much. I felt like I let her down that night she was in the hospital and I told her she would be okay and that I would be waiting for her when she woke up but she never woke up. I felt that made me a liar. I had been taking care of my mom for months and I was preparing her meals, giving her medications on schedule and was taking her to her appointments and running errands for her. My mom had been weak for so long because before she found out she had cancer she was bleeding perfusely having vaginal bleeding and they made her very anemic. Before surgery she had 4 transfusions and then after surgery she had 2 more. She never got all her strength back and after she had the first surgery, she was too weak that they sent her to Ballard Rehabilitation and they were working on getting her strength back and getting her up and walking. She did so much better when she was in there and when she came home, they sent out a home health nurse, a physcialy therapist and an occupational therapist. They began doing exercises with her and the physical therapist thought it would benefit my mom to have some help with getting around. So she ordered her an walker , the kind that had a seat on it, she ordered her a wheel chair, a raised toilet seat with the rails and a shower chair and shower bench. So when my mom started walking more better she was using her walker all the time, it was helping her because she had the support to keep her from falling and when she got tired , she could just sit down. I did all I could to take care of her, on a daily basis. She was not strong enough to shower herself, so I bought the shower hose and I began to shower her daily, dress her and do everything for her but I loved her so much and I didn't care what I had to do, she was my mom. There were days when she thought she was a burden to me and she would tell me, that I work to hard and that she was sorry she was not able to do things for herself and i would immediately tell her to stop talking like that. I would tell her, she was my mom, I loved her and wanted to look after her and that she wasn't a burden on me. That she took care of me when I was little and over the years and now it was my turn to take care of her. She told me a couple weeks before she passed away , you said, you really stood by your mom, when all the others went on their way. you stood by your mom. She said, I don't know what I would have done with out you. She said I don't know how I would have made it and she said god is really going to bless you and he will remember everything you did for your mother. She told me how special I was and now that she is gone , I remember everything she ever told me. It has been so hard, going through all her things and seeing all the cards and letters she gave me over the years. Everybody keeps telling me it will get better but I don't see that happening. I can't go one day without crying for missing her so much. I am grateful because she is not in any more pain but I am hurting so badly without her. I have a big sister but we have never been that close, she seems to want to spend more time with me now but nobody could ever feel that empty space inside my heart for my mother. I recently moved in with my brother and I want so desperately for me and my daughter to be able to get a place of our own. It costs so much to pay for first and last months rent and I have this old 1994 car that has been giving me so much trouble and I am barely scraping along , just trying to make it. I would appreciate any help I am given. If anyone can find it in their heart to help me and my daughter move out and get our own place or simply help us with the day to day necessities, it would be greatly appreciated.

My daughter and I are in need of finding a place of our own. These past couple months have been extremely hard because of the death of my mother. We were all living together and my mom was splitting the rent with me and I was working to take care of her. She was sick with Cancer and she had the operation and we all thought she was going to be okay. She did not recover like we expected and she ended up going in a Rehabilitation Center and we visited her often until she came home. I am the youngest of her children. I have 3 brothers and 1 sister and we are called the Berry 5. We were allways known as the Berry Family from the time we were little. My mom started to do better and we were so happy to have her home. It came time for her to Start Chemotherapy and Radiation. She was scared but I and my sister talked her into it because we knew the doctors had told us that she needed it because the cancer had spread to her lymp nodes and when they did the surgery they were not able to get everything. My mom had done one week of Radiation and she went in for one session of Chemo. The same day she had Chemo she seemed fine and then 2 days later she was having fevers, throwing up and so extremely weak. I thought it was because of the Chemo because that is what was explained to us. My concern was she couldn't keep anything down. I needed to give her medication for her Diabetes and High Blood Pressure but everytime I gave her anything, it all came up and so I was so scared because her blood sugar was high and I didn't want it to get any higher. She began to complain of stomach pain and I thought it was another side effect of the Chemo. For a couple days of her vomiting and having diarrhea, I was able to get some fluids down her and it seemed to stay. Little by little we both thought she was doing better. Her strength was not there though, it was difficult for her to even get up to go to the bathroom. The following day she continued to vomit and I was scared so I told her she needed to go to the hospital, because I felt that they could help her more. They could give her medications through an IV and they could find out why she was so weak and everything. She was scared and did not want to go but I convinced her. The ambulance came and took her to the hospital. I tried to follow her but I had to pick up my 11 year old daughter from school. I did go and they would not let me go back right away. I told them my mom had been brought in and they told me she wasn't checked in yet. About 20 minutes passed and I went back up to the window and they told me they would see if the doctor would let me back there and they were saying my daughter couldn't come back there because she wasn't 14, I told them she is only 11 years old and I'm not leaving her in the waiting room with strangers and that she was coming back there with me. They finally let us in and we went back to see my mom. I couldn't believe they had her hooked up to so many machines and she was on morphine and so out of it. I walked up to her and I said Ma, I'm here and she turned and looked at me. She was happy to see me, but then she told me that they told her, they found blood in her stools. I told her it was probably just do to her Hemorrhoids. but she said they told her it was positive for something. I asked her for what and she didn't know. I began looking for the doctor so I could ask questions but he wasn't around and everyone I talked to told me the doctor would be in soon to go over my mom's condition. I stayed with my mom, just holding her hand, telling her I loved her and that she was going to be okay. They came in to take her to have an ultrasound and my daughter and I waited. The doctor finally came in and told me that my mom had an abcess in her stomach that had burst. I said what are you talking about? He said that she had a condition called peridonitis and that the abcess burst and was releasing all this poison inside her stomach and her blood pressure was dropping dramatically. He then told me it was too dangerous for them to operate at that time because her INR level to to high. My mom had been taking Cumadin for a blood clot that she previously had and the cumadin made her INR level extremely high and her blood was not clotting so they said if they did surgery, she would bleed out. They said they needed to correct it by giving her lots of blood products and they gave her all kinds of strong antibiotics and blood and plasma. They were pumping so much stuff into her, I didn't know what to do. Her blood pressure was like 85/60 and then like 76/40 and it was getting lower and lower. They had her hooked up to so many IVs and then they told me that she was the sickest person they had in the ER. So many doctors and interns and students and nurses overcrowded my mom's room. I called my sister and told her what was going on and she came down to be with me and my daughter. They told us they would do all they could for my mom but that it didn't look good. I began to pray, my mom had always taught me to pray and give things over to god. As the night went on, they decided to put an IV in my moms neck, they said it was more direct and if and when she went to surgery it would be better to have that in place. They made us leave the room and they had like 10 people in there with there machines and cameras and equipment to help guide them where to put the IV at. I had never gone through this before and I was so scared but I was keeping my faith. One doctor wanted to talk to me and my sister alone and I didn't want to hear him telling me anything negative. He asked us a lot of questions concerning my mom's health and history. He then told us that she was in acute renal failure and that her colon was damaged where the abcess bursts and fecal was being released into her abdomen. This is the last thing I wanted to hear. I asked him if they could fix it, he said they would do all they could but that their main focus was trying to bring her INR levels down because they were dangerously high. She was also anemic and that is why she was so weak, her blood level was extremely low. They were continuously giving her blood products, antibiotics and plasma. My sister decided to take my daughter home with her. I told her I would call her when I knew when they were going to do surgery. The surgeon had spoken to us and said that it was a good chance, and that operating was her only chance and once her blood level was corrected that they would go in and repair the damage. I felt some what relieved but as the night went on she was in a fight for her life. The main doctor working on my mom's case came and told me that her breathing was not getting any better and that he needed to put her to sleep so he could intubate her and put a breathing tube down her throat. He said it would be good to have anyways so that she would be ready when they went to surgery. There was nothing I could do except walk out of the room and wait. I continued to pray and wait and pray and wait. Hours went by and I would walk and peek inside the room and see my mom's blood pressure increasing some, this gave me hope but then the doctor would come and tell me it wasn't looking like she was improving and that we needed to prepare that she might not make it through the night. i couldn't believe what he was telling me. I called my sister and my brother and told them , they were praying as well. I didn't know who to listen to, one doctor is telling me it's hopeless and the surgeon is telling me it's a good chance she would be okay once taken to surgery. I sat in the hall because they wouldn't let me back in and they stayed with her at all times, monitoring her and giving her medicine and all the blood and stuff back to back. Then they came out in the hall and told me they were ready to take her to surgery. They said she might not hear you but you can still talk to her. I walked up to her lying there, so still and I told her how much I loved her and i told her to fight and that we would do it togther and that I would be here when she woke up and that I was not leaving her. The surgeon put me in the OR waiting room. I was all alone in there by myself. I waited and waited and only 20 mins went by and a security guard told me there was a cafe there and if I wanted to go grab a cup of coffee that I could. I went downstairs and got the coffee, as soon as I reached the OR floor I saw the surgeon standing there, he walked over to me and he said, I'm sorry but your mom's heart stopped during surgery and we revived her but then it stopped again and he said I don't we can get it back. My whole world just crumbled, I began screaming and crying and I fell to the floor. I was just askig God why. Why is this happening? This security lady came over to comfort me and began telling me how sorry she was and asked me if I had any family I could call. I called my sister and told her and she said she was on her way down. She lived in another city about 45 mins away. I was still on the ground just broken and this lady began to tell me that God would help me and give me the strength to go on. She asked me if I had any children, I told her I had a daughter, and she told me I needed to be strong for her. I wasn't trying to hear all that. My whole world was ripped right from under me. A couple of doctors and this lady helped me off the floor and the surgeon that came out , came out again and told me they would take me back to see her. They brought out a wheelchair and wheeled me back there and when they opened the door, my god I just saw them on top of her doing chest compressions and I was just screaming and then the surgeon is telling me I need to make a decision because everytime they do that, they are hurting her and he said, you don't want her to suffer anymore. I was just waiting on my sister4. I didn't want to make that call but I didn't want them pounding her chest in so I told them to stop. It killed in me inside. They wheeled me over to her and I just cried. My mom was only 60 years old and she had her whole life ahead of her and I don't understand why any of this happened. She was such a beautiful person and she had been a christian for 33 years. SHe loved the lord and she raised me and my siblings up in the church. I couldn't believe that she was gone because I had prayed and prayed and I just knew that God would spare her life. I lost my real father at the age of 16 and even then I didn't know him. I always had my mom and she remarried when I was 11 years old. She had been married for 19 years and my step father passed away in July of 2008. He was a sickly person and she took care of him and nursed him for all those years. He had diabetes, high blood pressure, prostate cancer, he was on dialysis for kidney failure, he had a four by pass surgery and he was in and out of the hospitals for years. She suffered so much seeing him suffer and taking care of him, he took what little strength she had. But because he was her husband she did all she could to help him and she loved him so much. So now all remains is just me and my siblings. It's hard because my mom was my best friend. I can't remember a time when she wasn't around. We did everything together and we lived together for years and I took care of her. I wanted so bad for her to be okay and to make it through surgery, I had been taught for years about the love of Jesus and I couldn't understand what he chose to take her away from her children and grandchildren. We had a two bedroom apartment and she had her room and my daughter and I shared a room. After she died, I went home that morning with my sister and I stayed over there for the remainder of the day. The whole day was just hurting, crying and calling the rest of the family. I felt so bad because my youngest brother, say youngest because he is the youngest of my 3 brothers, even though they are all older than me. He came to the hospital to see my mom but he thought she was still alive and the doctors didn't tell him, they let him in the room and she was already covered up and he walked in and was like, it's over ?? he couldn't believe it , he just broke down. One of the nurses that was in the OR called my sister and he was crying, apologizing to us because he thought my brother already knew. He told us how sorry he was. Now my family is broken, my mom was the rock that held us all together. We didn't have money growing up, we didn't have a lot of the finer things in life but we had love. She loved us like no one could. She did it all for her children and most importantly she taught us about God. She lived her life for Jesus, she would pray on a regular basis, read her bible daily, go to church often as she could and when things looked hopeless she took them to god in prayer. She prayed not only for her children, grandchildren and siblings but for people all over the world, she would pray for all the countries and for the sick and homeless and anyone she could pray for. She gave over the years endlessly to Trinity Broadcasting Network, Feed the children, CBN, David Terrell Ministries, Boys Town, Children International, Food For All and to so many others. Month after month, year after year she was giving. She taught us how to give and there were times when we would just make food and take it to the park to give to the homeless, bottled water, sandwiches, noodles, chicken or whatever we could. She would never turn down a person needing help or asking for spare change, she would give freely. She would tell me all the time, it's better to give than to receive and that god would bless me. So I began giving as well, I would call and donate and try to help whenever I could. My mom was also a big giver to the goodwill. Over the years we gave so much, and everytime they would ask if we wanted a donation paper for a tax write off she would say no. she didn't want that, she was giving freely and she didn't want anything in return. That's who she was, she was the person who would mentor you and talk to you about Jesus and how over the years he brought her and our family through so many trials and tribulations. SHe praised god for everything, for the good times and the bad. She used to always tell me to be thankful and to praise god. Now there were times when i was suffering so much and I didn't want to praise god, I wanted god to help me and at the time it seemed like he wasn't. My mom was always there to tell me baby, hold on.. give your burdens over to the lord and he will help you and supply all your needs. I realized that he did just that. I remember when she had surgery for the cancer and she was wondering why god allowed her to come down with that. It was hard for her because her faith was shaken then. She couldn't believe after she was faithful to him for so many years that he would allow her to suffer so horribly and there my sister and I were telling her that she would be okay, that God loved her still and he had not forsaken her and that he would bring her through this. She was so discouraged at the time but we would not let up. She couldn't believe this was her children mentoring and encouragiing her as she had done for us over the years. She told me, she was happy and she felt relieved that her living and everything she had taught us was not in vain. She was thankful to God that we were listening to her and by example we followed her footsteps. She began to get better and we thought she would be okay. My mom was a pure Christian, she didn't drink, didn't smoke, didn't do drugs, didn't curse. She would make you turn the tv channel if you were watching something that cursed. She loved her cowboys though. Her favorites were Bonanza, The rifle man, High Chapparal, Wagon Train, The Virginian and so many others. She also loved the old shows, the clean shows, the original dennis the menace, columbo, family affair, petticoat junction, I married joan, hawai five o, the streets of san francisco, i spy, murder she wrote, in the heat of the night, matlock, the big vally, dr quinn, little house on the prairie, family ties, good times, 227, what's happening, the jeffersons, the brady bunch and so many others. Her favorite game shows were The price is right, deal or no deal, let's make a deal, the newlywed game, match game and who wants to be a millionaire. I loved spending time with my mom, she was someone I could always talk to and she would never judge me, she would tell me how much she loved me and how proud she was of me. She taught me how to carry myself as a lady and she taught me how to stand up for myself and I owe her so much. I felt like I let her down that night she was in the hospital and I told her she would be okay and that I would be waiting for her when she woke up but she never woke up. I felt that made me a liar. I had been taking care of my mom for months and I was preparing her meals, giving her medications on schedule and was taking her to her appointments and running errands for her. My mom had been weak for so long because before she found out she had cancer she was bleeding perfusely having vaginal bleeding and they made her very anemic. Before surgery she had 4 transfusions and then after surgery she had 2 more. She never got all her strength back and after she had the first surgery, she was too weak that they sent her to Ballard Rehabilitation and they were working on getting her strength back and getting her up and walking. She did so much better when she was in there and when she came home, they sent out a home health nurse, a physcialy therapist and an occupational therapist. They began doing exercises with her and the physical therapist thought it would benefit my mom to have some help with getting around. So she ordered her an walker , the kind that had a seat on it, she ordered her a wheel chair, a raised toilet seat with the rails and a shower chair and shower bench. So when my mom started walking more better she was using her walker all the time, it was helping her because she had the support to keep her from falling and when she got tired , she could just sit down. I did all I could to take care of her, on a daily basis. She was not strong enough to shower herself, so I bought the shower hose and I began to shower her daily, dress her and do everything for her but I loved her so much and I didn't care what I had to do, she was my mom. There were days when she thought she was a burden to me and she would tell me, that I work to hard and that she was sorry she was not able to do things for herself and i would immediately tell her to stop talking like that. I would tell her, she was my mom, I loved her and wanted to look after her and that she wasn't a burden on me. That she took care of me when I was little and over the years and now it was my turn to take care of her. She told me a couple weeks before she passed away , you said, you really stood by your mom, when all the others went on their way. you stood by your mom. She said, I don't know what I would have done with out you. She said I don't know how I would have made it and she said god is really going to bless you and he will remember everything you did for your mother. She told me how special I was and now that she is gone , I remember everything she ever told me. It has been so hard, going through all her things and seeing all the cards and letters she gave me over the years. Everybody keeps telling me it will get better but I don't see that happening. I can't go one day without crying for missing her so much. I am grateful because she is not in any more pain but I am hurting so badly without her. I have a big sister but we have never been that close, she seems to want to spend more time with me now but nobody could ever feel that empty space inside my heart for my mother. I recently moved in with my brother and I want so desperately for me and my daughter to be able to get a place of our own. It costs so much to pay for first and last months rent and I have this old 1994 car that has been giving me so much trouble and I am barely scraping along , just trying to make it. I would appreciate any help I am given. If anyone can find it in their heart to help me and my daughter move out and get our own place or simply help us with the day to day necessities, it would be greatly appreciated.

I was born with a rare syndrome called Dan-
dy-Walker syndrome. It is being born with-
out a cerebellum. This snydrome caused me
to involuntarily tilt my head from side-to-
side all my life. I am 40 years old and it
is still there,but not nearly as bad, in
fact,all during school,my nickname was"tilt
". My entire childhood was full of ridicule
embarrasement, friendless,and dateless. It
was like this for the first 20 years of my
life.I have lived my life one close to the
poverty level. I have not even started to
live life. I finally have a chance to own
a house and be among the normal person,but
I need the $15,000 for the down payment.I
will never have a normal life,but owning a
house would be huge in my miserable life.
PLEASE,PLEASE HELP!!

I am a single mother in need of help I am still recovering from the loss of everything I owned due to a personal tragedy .My mama and other other family members also could use some help .I am in bad health but am willing to work for any donations as much as I am physically able to.It would sure be a blessing to get some of the things we need to get ahead to the point where we could have a better quality of life.My child is about to have a birthday coming up and I would love to be able to give him something .I am also about to move into a new place cause I am staying with family and they are no longer going to be able to help me for they are very poor themselves ,so I will to move out and will need beds ,houshold items ,and many other things when I move . I will list below .I am first and foremost in need of food my ID expired and I have had difficuly getting up to the DMV to renew it so I am not going to be able to apply for food stamps until I can get up there and renew it problem is I dont have the money to renew it .I worked my whole life until now and hate to ask for help but my health and personal problems with being a victim of domestic violence and failing health has been a real set back .I know some will judge me and think I am a bad person for placing this ad but that is on them not me ,I am just simply trying to get some help for my family ,I am not asking for cash ,or anything elaborate just things my family needs .
Here are some things that would help us out alot ,I have listed things for other family members as well that are in need due to disability ,loss of employment ,a fire etc .
I appreciate any help ,we will pickup in all areas .May God Bless you
Things that would greatly help are in no certain order are the ones listed below..Please scroll down to bottom of ad for complete list.God Bless .



blinds
Childrens beds ,bed frames etc
Dressers all sizes including Children's dressers
A boys robe size 7,9,8,10
Childrens toys or other things to be used as entertainment
Information on where I can get an expensive childrens haircut
Volunteers to help with needs of family
Winter gloves all sizes
Winter hats all sizes
Childrens books
Mattress cover
Pet supplies food etc
A camper or RV we could live in real cheap or for free or even a trailor
Information on where I could get reduced cost dental work
Info . on a room to rent with a private enterance
info a Church that would give a family temporary shelter
information on local food banks that could help with food
Information on any local clothing closests
Information on anywhere in the area I could sleep for a few nights for very cheap
Information on a room that I can play a flat rate per month that alo
A inexpensive motel room I can rent by the week
white pain
rugs
something to treat rotted wood
glass frames for man extra large
Mens hats Extra large
small kitchen table
something that you can hang clothes on
photo frames
a vegetable tray
a hand-held vaccum cleaner
cups or glasess
ear mittens for kids
gloves for kids or adults










Food items
Girls sizes baby(all sizes)
BABy boys clothing (all sizes
, Girls clothing ,,2t,3t 4t,5,6,7,8
Boys clothing all sizes
Teen boys clothing all sizes
Teen girls clothing all sizes
Clothing the boys wear sizes //four,five,six,seven,eight ,nine ,
Boys winter coats in sizes 6,7 ,8,9 ,10
Kids shoes boys and girls
Kids socks
Childrens toys
Any baby or Childrens items
Household items
Beds of any size
Towels
Silverware
bathroom caddys or shelfing
Curtains
A microwave
any furniture
clothing womens sizes Large ,XLarge ,and all sizes larger than those some of the women in my family wear very large sizes ,we really need 3x and 4x very badly
Vaccum cleaner
toilitries ,cleaning supplies ,baby wipes ,diapers etc,soaps ,shampoos etc
A TV
someone to give my uncle a good discount on repairing his floor
helmet
shoulder pads .knee,pads elbow pads for a boy to ensure safety when he rides his bike
A trey to eat on
Childrens beds ,bed frames etc
Dressers all sizes including Children's dressers
Childrens sunglasess
anything I can use to give the children as an Easter Basket or for Easter
Glass Frames for a man with a bigger head
any discounts on motel rooms








moving supplies
Birthday party supplies
Childs bookbag
Car seat for child under 50 pounds
prepaid cell phone
recliner
mini fridge
can opener
a Women's winter coat in size XL or larger
blankets
sleeping bag in case we cant find beds
futon
Womens ,mens ,and childrens socks,
plastic tubs in case we do not get a dresser
A room divider
Clothes hangers
over the counter medicines
Men's clothing XL,2xl,3xl,4xlt,5xlt,5xl,any pants over the size 50
Mens shoes sizes 12 e,12ee,12eee
Womens bras all sizes D cup and on up to much larger sizes
Anything that can be used for a birthday party as gifts ,decorations ,party favors entertainment etc
Bookbags
School supplies
coffee table
stroller
childrens cups or plates
envelopes
womens shoes size 8.5 /9
Many Many things one would need when moving into new place
Clothes hanger
Any big tall mens items
recliner
tuppaware containers
teddy bear net
any organizers or storage containers


cover ,sheets ,throws ,blankets
disability items walker ,wheelchair ,arthritus supplies ,diabetic supplies
Anything an elderly person could use








Childrens beds ,bed frames etc
Dressers all sizes including Children's dressers

September 2011: Had a nearly fatal motorcycle accident on Lucent Blvd. in Denver. The events leading up to the accident I am unclear of, all I remember is waking up underneith a car and couldnt move. I remember the ambulance showing up to extricate me. Apparently I had a shattered pelvis and a broken humorus. I also sustained another concussion. I never was a big fan of the helmet, in fact very rarely did I wear one. I just happened by chance to decide to wear one that day, if I hadnt I'd be dead. It used to be that I struggled to survive, now I struggle to exist. This account is by my wife:

On September 28th, 2011
My husband Trevan had an accident on is his way to an Interview and he was going on Lucent to get on to the highway on C470 and was not able to see with the dew on the street and sun glare. He didn’t see the car at the stoplights, going on to C470. Didn’t know or see that it was stopped at the light. The sun was so bad that he slammed right into the person in front of him and went over the handlebars of the motorcycle and over the person’s car and was found underneath the car. The Paramedics found him under the person’s car and had to pull him out from under it.

I got a call about 8:15 am from the fire department letting me know that my husband was in an accident. I was so scared I was trying to get my son ready for school and get my daughter ready to so I could take him. I was told that he was taken to Littleton Hospital and that I can call over there and get info on how he is doing. Instead of me calling the ER the ER nurse called me and gave me some info about what they are doing and what ER room they are taking him to. They took some x-rays and he couldn’t be moved because they were not sure about his back. So they did the x-rays in the ER. That is what the nurse told me that they were doing and that he was stable. The nurse also said if I could get to the hospital as soon as I could, it would be a good idea to come since the police and fire department was still there. I told her I would try. I called my mother in law to let her that her son was in an accident and I called my mom. There were other people that I called too. When I got there and I had to park so far in the back of the hospital that I had to ask for directions to get to the ER from the outpatient so I could be there with my husband. When I got there it was very hard to see what he looked like. He had a neck brace on and his left arm was all wrapped up like a present. He had a big gash on the inside of his right leg that was pretty wide and you could see the fat and it kept on bleeding. They would not take off the brace from his neck because they didn’t know what else was going on with him. I met the ER doctors and they told me that he is in quite bit of pain, and that he was starting to not know what happened off and on. I tried to see if he could tell me himself but could not remember. One of the ER doctors was very concerned about the blood in his urine so they took him to another place in the hospital to do some more tests on him. My mom in the mean time called me and told me that she was on her way to be at the hospital with me for support, I told her that I really need some comfort and to keep it together. When she got here Trevan was not yet taken to get tested yet so my mom said hi to him and ask him questions. Then with the ER nurses came in to take him for the tests my mom ask the nurse what kind of test that they were going to do on him and they said it is to check for internal bleeding. When Trevan was taken back we went to sit in the waiting room in the ER. My mom kept asking me questions but I could not answer any of them, because I have not been told about any thing besides what the nurse told me on the phone before I got there. I ask the nurses that were still around they’re about where his belonging were because I needed to know if his wallet and other things like ring and glasses was there. They handed me the beg that had his wallet and other things that they took off of him. I took the beg with me so I could go through it and see if every thing was still with him. His wedding band was in there his wallet was in there and socks and helmet was there too so I took it with me out to the waiting room. There was also a ticket that the police left in it too. My mom took a look at it to find out what all happened. It just said it was his fault but we didn’t think it was his fault, but later on we did fine out it was his fault but we took care of it for him while he was in the hospital. While we were waiting Trevan’s mom came with my daughter to see him but he was still not back in the Trauma room. After a while they finally moved him to a room so we all went there. They took him to the ICU and we had to keep our hands clean at all times coming and going. Trevan was put on many powerful pain medicines for the pain. He was put on dilaudid and he was on that for a while but then he was inching so bad that they took him off of that and put him on morphine he was a little better but still was itching like crazy.

Doug and Jan drove out here on Wednesday night they didn’t stop except for brakes and gas but they drove all the way through so could see Trevan. They arrived at the hospital at 3:30 am. Trevan didn’t remember that his dad and step mom came to see him the first night. I told him twice that they were here and he just didn’t remember it. Every one came to see Trevan everyday Doug and J, Karen and John Hager, Kehli, his mom Beverly. Doug and Jan were here for four days and they were here also for the surgery. We had a lot of people in the waiting room Beverly and our kids, me, and Doug and Jan. I was happy that I had that many people there with me because I was very upset.

October 1st 2011
Trevan had his surgery on both the pelvis and the humerus bone. The doctor started with his pelvis first he said it was the quick one and that Trevan didn’t loose much blood with that one. Then the doctor moved Trevan to another table to do the other part of the surgery. He lost a little bit of blood when they did his surgery on the arm they had to give him two pints of blood. The doctor did come out to tell us the update as he did them and how everything was going. He showed us before and after x-rays. The doctor did a great job of fixing Trevan up. Then after the surgery was done he was in recovery room for about an hour and a half. They moved Trevan to his room afterwards and he still was not doing hot. He kept saying that the room was moving and it made him sick. He tried to keep his eyes closed but it made him even feel worse. He also kept asking for ice chips which I feed to him as much as I could. He was better by the evening, he didn’t feel dizzy any more. Family kept coming to see him and tell him that they love him and pray that he will heal quickly. I stayed with him every night after the surgery to keep an eye on how he was doing. He didn’t remember a lot of things, which in some ways it is good but in some ways it is bad. I think a lot of it had to do with the pain medicine that the doctors was giving him. A nurse told me that it could happen with the medicine could make you forgetful depending on what kind of pain medicine.

October 4th 2011
While Trevan was at the hospital he did fall. He hit his head agents the closet that was in his room. The nurses found him on the floor. They did say that when he fell he landed on his right side and that they don’t think he hurt him self, but he did hit his head when he went down. I asked them if they were going to see if he did any damage, and they said that he didn’t and couldn’t do that much damage because the way he fell. I asked them if he hurt any thing else and the nurse they checked him over and asked him questions and didn’t see any evidence that he had any more damage to what he already had. I asked to if they did any test to see. They said they didn’t do any other tests on him because they didn’t want him to be exposed to any more radiation from the x-ray machine. He was getting out of bed by his self with out any help, which he was not supposed to do that. That is why when he fell they put a bed alarm on his bed so they would know at all times that he gets up, for his safety.

October 5th 2011
During that time while he was a Littleton hospital they were trying to find a rehab place for him so he can start getting back on his feet. They did find one and they had him transferred from Littleton to Porter hospital. Before he left I told him that I would see him later that evening and so will his mom and kids. He said ok and they he was gone. That evening Beverly and the rest of us call daddy from his mom’s phone to let him know that we are coming to see him but we were going to stop and get something to eat on the way up to the hospital. Then while we were eating at Wendy’s he calls me on my cell phone and asks if we were still coming I told him yes. I asked him did you even remember that we called you before and told you that we were coming he said no he didn’t remember. While he was on the phone with me still we asked him if he wanted us to bring something for him. He said yes. We brought him a hamburger and a frosty. When we got to the Porter hospital and got to his room we noticed it was very small and odd shaped. He had a window but in the wrong place or the room was just in the worst place. It looked like a bad shaped L and had no flow to it. I asked Trevan on how he was doing and he said tired and in pain. I said you just been through a lot and it will take a while to heal. Then we gave him is food and let him eat while we also talked to the nurses that were taking care of him there. We also ask that if there was a way for a cot to be put in there so I could stay with him some of the times. They said yes that they will get one in the room the next time I come up to see him. I said thanks. They also had a bed alarm on his bed and his wheel chair that he was using. I am happy that they had that on there but the moment that he got up to use the urinal that the alarm went off. And he didn’t feel comfortable with them always coming in and him not able to potty when he wanted too. When he is in the bed but keep it on when he is in the wheel chair because he could not remember to lock his brakes before he transferred form the wheel >chair to bed or just getting up to stand.

October 6th 2011
Trevan calls him mom to get my number to be able to call me. He talked to her for a while and he also asked if we were coming to see him, and also asked if we knew where he was. His mom said yes she knew and asked him if he remembered that we were the other night. He said no and also said that we weren’t there to see him. Which we were there but he just didn’t remember that we were all there his son and daughter me and his mom. He forgot the entire evening and event that we even were there to see him the night before. His mom said to him that we were all coming to see you again tonight so we will see you later. The same day I went to take our van to get the oil changed in it and found out that there was a clucking sound and they told me that it was not safe for me to keep driving it. They said about a week or two would be all I should drive it. I called my dad and asked if he knew any one that I could take my van to get an idea on how much it would cast to get it fixed. This was all the same day that I was going to see Trevan at the hospital. They didn’t want me to drive it anymore until it was fixed. So Beverly had to take me back and forth to and from the hospital for a while. After Beverly got off work we all got in to the car and drove up to the hospital. We asked the nurses if there was any way for Trevan to watch movies other than watching TV all the time. They said yes and told us there is a TV, VCR that is on a cart that can go into their room to watch movies and only VHS tapes only no DVD’S. So mom went into the lunchroom and looked at all the movies and wrote down all the ones that Trevan would be interested in watching. After she was done she brought the list to Trevan to see and to know that he had choices. Then we went home and told Trevan that we will see him later the next day. Then said our good-byes.

October 7th 2011
There was a lot of thing going on this day that I don’t want to go through again. I had to take my van to a place that my sister in law told me about. I made my appointment with them the day before and they wanted me to bring it back today and get it fixed. They even said that it was not safe at all. I left it with them to fix it in the morning. Then I came back home and had more things to do. I had to run around back and forth using my mother in laws car which was ok she was taking care of my daughter and my niece so I got thing done and I was able to relax a little bit. We all went to see Trevan that evening. We had to go and pick up my van after we picked up dinner. Then we left to see Trevan. When we got there into Trevan’s room he looked really tired and in a bit of pain. We got an extra hamburger so we gave it to him so he could eat it. Of course he at it all up. I changed the channel and found shreck the movie and we all watched that with Trevan. The nurse cam in to see how he was doing. He said that he needed more pain medicine, also needed to have his depends changed. The kids and grandma left outside the room while he was getting changed. After he got settled again the kids came back in and they were getting rowdy so I ask Beverly to take the kids home. They gave their daddy a kiss and left. That night I stayed with him and he kept on asking if the nurse had given him his pain medicine. I told him yes that they did give you your medicine. I asked him if even remembered it and he said no. He asked me 4 other times to while I was there. When it was time for him to have another dose of medicine I said to use the call button that is what it is there for instead of me always running in and out of his room to let the nurses know that he needed more medicine. I stayed with him all night it was very hard for me to hear. When Trevan would fall to sleep he would start dreaming and breathing heavy then wake up crying and then fell back to sleep. It would go on about 5 times at night. I think it was nightmares and when he wakes up he would not remember any of it.

October 8th 2011
The nurses were coming into see how Trevan was doing. He had his breakfast and pain medicine. After breakfast the therapist came in to take him to do some therapy stuff. He worked on the ramp with wheel chair going up and down with keeping control with his feet. The first round was 35 minutes. Then comes back and rests for a half-hour and goes again for 30 minutes. Then he came back and rested and had lunch. Then he went with another therapist and goes and has a shower, but after a while he came back. The nurses told me when they came back with Trevan that the cut on the inside of the right leg came open while they were helping him with his shower. He lost a little bit of blood but it hurt him quite a bit. So two nurses came back. One was pushing him and the other on putting pressure on the wound. When he was back in the room he looked like a ghost, and looked very tired. Then his nurse came in to put a different kind of bandage on his leg. By the end of the day he had color back in his face and was doing better. That day and evening he didn’t know that I was staying with him. I was with him at the hospital since Friday night, to Sunday evening. I will be going home on Sunday night.

October 9th 2011
The nurses and doctors decided not to have therapy because Trevan gave them a scare. So they just let him rest and let the wound heal some more before he did any more. I watched him sleep and he has the bad dreams again all day, and all night. I woke up every time he had the dreams. I counted how many times he would wake up and go to sleep again. It was hard to hear too. When he did wake up I would ask if he remembered any of it. He would say No. I did let the nurses know what was going on with Trevan and also asked him to keep an eye out and check on him. I also asked them to keep a record of it too. I left the evening so I could take care of my kids the next day. My mother in law had to work and had to keep Sarah with me. I said my good-byes. I asked the nurses to keep me in formed on how he did through the night.

October 10th 2011
Trevan told me that he had therapy and that he was in some pain. He was up in the wheel chair and bed. He was learning how to put socks and underwear, shorts and shirt on by him self with out help and doing it all by with one hand. He did OK is what he said. It is hard for him to remember which arm to do in first. The nurses said try to remember left first than over the head than right arm. Then put your glasses on so you can see. He said he would try to remember. Then I went home. He also saw the doctor and asked for Ibuprofen.

October 11th 2011
I got to the hospital to see Trevan about 7ish. He looked tire but also happy to see me. He said to me when I can in “I was wondering when you were going to be here” I said I had to take care of the kids first. In the morning he did therapy then he has lunch and after he had lunch he did some more activities he had u ride outside and played scrabble to get his mind working on thinking. That is what he did during the day when I was not there to see him during the day Trevan had therapy and looked somewhat tired when I got there, he was also in his wheel chair. He ate all the tacos that his mom got for him. After we got done eating he was in a lot of pain. He asked for more pain medicine and he could not get any more ibuprofen. So they gave him percocet for the pain. All we did while I was there with him we talked and watched TV together. Was late when I left to go home and care for my kids.

October 12th 2011
I went to see Trevan about 7ish again. He did a lot of thing in the morning it was all written down so I knew what he did. Which he was to do every day for his memory issues that he has. He had breakfast then he had PT. He did exercises with his legs. ST. tested him it scored 20 out of 25 on the cognitive tests. Then he did some transferring using one leg, 2-½ lbs. on the other leg (right leg all weight and partial weight on the left.) After lunch he did the walker, wheel chair, shower, teeth and hair. All of this info that I keep getting is what he writes down for his memory reminder. I took a look at him and asked him how he is doing, He said he is in a bit of pain. A lot of pain was mainly in the arm. He asked for some pain medicine and he started to fall to sleep. So I told him that I would head home and take care of the kids. He said to tell them that he loves them. I said ok.

October 13th 2011
Just reading his report that he wrote. He did getting in to his wheel chair to go to the toilet, Independence Square and weight. That was his activities during the day and he also had another stitch pop and his leg started bleeding again. That is what he told me. It is covered with gaze. I was happy that they did put that on there to protect it better. He has been sleeping better. They aren’t using the walker with the plate form because of his bad left arm. He is balancing so much better on his right leg which I am very proud of him. I noticed while I was there he didn’t remember that he had his pain medicine which they did give it to him. But they could not give him any more until 9:15 PM. And it was about 8:20 PM when he asked for more pain medicine.

October 14th 2011
Trevan woke up around 5:45 am having pain in his arm and needed to be changed. Found out that Dr. Bess has not released him from putting more weight on his left leg. It will be 30% weight for a while. At a little bit after 9 this morning went for a wheel chair walk. He sat in the wheel chair and used his right foot to move him forward and his right hand also help him to move forward in the direction that he needs to go. He went around the hallway twice. Then after he did that he came back to his room, so after that another person came in and took him down to the shower. Both of us were in the shower room with the nurse getting him ready and helping him stand only on one leg. He could not put much weight on the left leg. After every thing was off the therapist helped him sit on the shower/ tub chair. We both helped him get cleaned up, but we made sure he did most of the cleaning up. He did well at listening to me and stayed seated until we needed him to stand to pull up his pants. He only used his right leg to stand on and his right arm to pull up. I told him if he comes home he is going to have to listen and wait until I can come and help him. I didn’t want him to fall again and end up in the hospital again. After the shower we went back to his room to rest for a few minutes. Then he went to do more moving therapy. He did hopping on the right leg and using the parallel bars with the right arm to and from the wheel chair. Then he did some bumping up and down on the stairs. They would not do any more of them for a while because it tired him out so much. We did not know when he would be able to come home yet. We were going to have someone come by to take a look at the house and see if he can come home. Right now it is set for wed. But it is not set in stone. I am planning to stay the night again and leave about 8:15 am to watch my daughter. Then I will be back to stay with him again that evening.

October 15th 2011
This is what Trevan did for the day, leg/ hip exercises, control wheelchair up and down ramp. ST- did memory strategies, put a picture with info, and writing down notes. OT- watched him do his brushing his teeth, getting dressed, independence square (cashier, shop, and sandwich) memory. That is what he did and also found out he has a urine infection. He slept a little bit, was up having to go to the potty all night, had to remind him mot to put any weight on his left leg. He said that he was not but I doubt it. I was watching him. After he was done he was always putting weight on the left leg every time he pushed his butt back in the bed. I am very worried about that. I did tell the nurses to keep an eye on him that he was having issues with him having to pee all the time. Since he had the infection. They said that they would keep watch and see how he does through the night.

October 16th 2011
Trevan had a bad day at remembering this day. I just don’t remember what he forgot because I was also very tired this day also.

October 17th 2011
We brought Trevan home to do the home inspection so we could find out what we all needed to do and what to get for the house, so Trevan can come home. We didn’t want him to get injured any more than what he is now. When we got to the house the two nurses had to lift him and the wheel chair up the stairs since we didn’t have the ramp up quite yet. We did tell them it would be up once we know what day we could get help. While Trevan was still sitting in the wheel chair he had to use the restroom. He did try to get in the restroom which he did do just fine, but when he was ready to get back out and into the wheel chair he almost fell in to the wheel. So they deiced not to have him use the small bathroom.

Thanks for taking the time to read this. I've never done anything like this before, so I am just going to speak from the heart. I am a 23 year old, gay, white male. I grew up on Disney. I believe that anything is possible, if you believe it to be. I have always tried to be a source of inspiration and strength for my friends. But my life keeps taking very negative turns.

My friends know a lot about the "adventures" I have been through in my life, but not all of it. They know that I have been homeless before, but they all assumed that I was staying at a different friend's house every night. They didn't know that I was sleeping in an abandoned apartment, a bus stop, a laundromat, and even under a bridge at one point. Being homeless is nothing new for me, but I am trying very hard to get back on my feet and take control of my life.

In an attempt to find a relationship and a home, I moved across the country to be (quite literally) a live-in sex slave for a couple whom I met on the internet. It seemed to go well for a short while, but they don't realize that they don't really want a third in their relationship. I have been the target of emotional and mental abuse for the past 6 months.

In November, I had a major operation on my ankle. I broke my ankle in 2006, and last year it began to deteriorate. Because of my ankle, I can't work a regular (read physical) job at this time. I have been searching for something I can do, even though I am not cleared for work yet. I am doing everything I can do, but the people I have been living with have decided I have to leave. I am doing everything I can to get together enough money to get back across half of the country to stay with some friends.

I don't have any money for food. The northern winter is killing me, as my clothes aren't really built for this weather. I still owe for the walking boot, cane, walker, and other equipment that I need for my physical recovery. I have to find a way to get somewhere where I'll be safe.

Everything that I have learned from Disney tells me to push forward and try to stay positive. I have done everything for my friends and family but they can't or won't help me now. I am asking for help, because I need to do whatever I can do to make sure that I will survive this winter. Thank you for your consideration. I appreciate any help I can get.

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I Like to get some magic tricks to perform street magic for the children i also, want to get a mechanical Flea Circus I don't have a car and its cold and I hav to beg on street corners and in front of stores and get kicked out and I go to get food handouts and i am on my walker because i am handicapped if you know me you ed seen me begging in front of the 99 cent store but theres a drunk there who beats me up and steals my pkace and the cops come and take him to jail but he comes back to the parking lot and intemindates the customers and pounds on me at the front to get out I am sick and tried of being poor and sick of begging

I hav to beg on street corners and in front of stores and get kicked out and I go to get food handouts and i am on my walker because i am handicapped if you know me you ed seen me begging in front of the 99 cent store but theres a drunk there who beats me up and steals my pkace and the cops come and take him to jail but he comes back to the parking lot and intemindates the customers and pounds on me at the front to get out I am sick and tried of being poor and sick of begging

I hav to beg on street corners and in front of stores and get kicked out and I go to get food handouts and i am on my walker because i am handicapped if you know me you ed seen me begging in front of the 99 cent store but theres a drunk there who beats me up and steals my pkace and the cops come and take him to jail but he comes back to the parking lot and intemindates the customers and pounds on me at the front to get out I am sick and tried of being poor and sick of begging

I hav to beg on street corners and in front of stores and get kicked out and I go to get food handouts and i am on my walker because i am handicapped if you know me you ed seen me begging in front of the 99 cent store but theres a drunk there who beats me up and steals my pkace and the cops come and take him to jail but he comes back to the parking lot and intemindates the customers and pounds on me at the front to get out I am sick and tried of being poor and sick of begging

I hav to beg on street corners and in front of stores and get kicked out and I go to get food handouts and i am on my walker because i am handicapped if you know me you ed seen me begging in front of the 99 cent store but theres a drunk there who beats me up and steals my pkace and the cops come and take him to jail but he comes back to the parking lot and intemindates the customers and pounds on me at the front to get out I am sick and tried of being poor and sick of begging

I hav to beg on street corners and in front of stores and get kicked out and I go to get food handouts and i am on my walker because i am handicapped if you know me you ed seen me begging in front of the 99 cent store but theres a drunk there who beats me up and steals my pkace and the cops come and take him to jail but he comes back to the parking lot and intemindates the customers and pounds on me at the front to get out I am sick and tried of being poor and sick of begging

I hav to beg on street corners and in front of stores and get kicked out and I go to get food handouts and i am on my walker because i am handicapped if you know me you ed seen me begging in front of the 99 cent store but theres a drunk there who beats me up and steals my pkace and the cops come and take him to jail but he comes back to the parking lot and intemindates the customers and pounds on me at the front to get out I am sick and tried of being poor and sick of begging

I hav to beg on street corners and in front of stores and get kicked out and I go to get food handouts and i am on my walker because i am handicapped if you know me you ed seen me begging in front of the 99 cent store but theres a drunk there who beats me up and steals my pkace and the cops come and take him to jail but he comes back to the parking lot and intemindates the customers and pounds on me at the front to get out I am sick and tried of being poor and sick of begging

I hav to beg on street corners and in front of stores and get kicked out and I go to get food handouts and i am on my walker because i am handicapped if you know me you ed seen me begging in front of the 99 cent store but theres a drunk there who beats me up and steals my pkace and the cops come and take him to jail but he comes back to the parking lot and intemindates the customers and pounds on me at the front to get out I am sick and tried of being poor and sick of begging

I hav to beg on street corners and in front of stores and get kicked out and I go to get food handouts and i am on my walker because i am handicapped if you know me you ed seen me begging in front of the 99 cent store but theres a drunk there who beats me up and steals my pkace and the cops come and take him to jail but he comes back to the parking lot and intemindates the customers and pounds on me at the front to get out I am sick and tried of being poor and sick of begging

I hav to beg on street corners and in front of stores and get kicked out and I go to get food handouts and i am on my walker because i am handicapped if you know me you ed seen me begging in front of the 99 cent store but theres a drunk there who beats me up and steals my pkace and the cops come and take him to jail but he comes back to the parking lot and intemindates the customers and pounds on me at the front to get out I am sick and tried of being poor and sick of begging

I hav to beg on street corners and in front of stores and get kicked out and I go to get food handouts and i am on my walker because i am handicapped if you know me you ed seen me begging in front of the 99 cent store but theres a drunk there who beats me up and steals my pkace and the cops come and take him to jail but he comes back to the parking lot and intemindates the customers and pounds on me at the front to get out I am sick and tried of being poor and sick of begging

I hav to beg on street corners and in front of stores and get kicked out and I go to get food handouts and i am on my walker because i am handicapped if you know me you ed seen me begging in front of the 99 cent store but theres a drunk there who beats me up and steals my pkace and the cops come and take him to jail but he comes back to the parking lot and intemindates the customers and pounds on me at the front to get out I am sick and tried of being poor and sick of begging

I hav to beg on street corners and in front of stores and get kicked out and I go to get food handouts and i am on my walker because i am handicapped if you know me you ed seen me begging in front of the 99 cent store but theres a drunk there who beats me up and steals my pkace and the cops come and take him to jail but he comes back to the parking lot and intemindates the customers and pounds on me at the front to get out I am sick and tried of being poor and sick of begging

I hav to beg on street corners and in front of stores and get kicked out and I go to get food handouts and i am on my walker because i am handicapped if you know me you ed seen me begging in front of the 99 cent store but theres a drunk there who beats me up and steals my pkace and the cops come and take him to jail but he comes back to the parking lot and intemindates the customers and pounds on me at the front to get out I am sick and tried of being poor and sick of begging