Teenagers Tags

I have tried and tried I no longer know what to do. I received sun burns on both arms and had tried to protect us. I am going through major heat stroke and trying to care for my family. Please help! This is a broken down list of what we need help with.

$140.00 Rent
$ 67.67 Power
$ 61.50 Cell phone
$75.00 for laundry
$ 120.00 for my brother’s dialysis medications
$400.00 Personal care for 5 people (my son, my brother, 2 of my daughters, and my-self) /Can accept things in care package email for a list of things.
$150.00 for fans
$200.00 for food would be awesome / can be sent in a care package or gift cards
$300.00 for my brothers food (renal diet)/ Can be sent in a care package (email for list of foods that are OK)

Even care packages sent by mail would be greatly appreciated.

I have 8 children biologically all together and can admit that with pride.
2 from my first marriage, both boys teenagers 15-16.
5 from my late boyfriend, 3 girls 2 boys ages 12-6. Their dad died on May 23, 2007
1 from a friend, a small male child 21 months now.

I love all my kids but not all currently live with me due to finances right now. And yes I am going to pay the price for the emotional part that will affect them due to this economy and my having to send them away.
I try my hardest but I cannot support them the way I used to and it breaks my heart.
Please help as I am now physically exhausted and spiritually drained.

E-mail for any questions you may have. angelswings2@yahoo.com
This is what my kid brother has:
Polycystic kidney disease (PKD) is a genetic disorder characterized by the growth of numerous cysts in the kidneys. The kidneys are two organs, each about the size of a fist, located in the upper part of a person's abdomen, toward the back. The kidneys filter wastes and extra fluid from the blood to form urine. They also regulate amounts of certain vital substances in the body. When cysts form in the kidneys, they are filled with fluid. PKD cysts can profoundly enlarge the kidneys while replacing much of the normal structure, resulting in reduced kidney function and leading to kidney failure.
When PKD causes kidneys to fail-which usually happens after many years-the patient requires dialysis or kidney transplantation. About one-half of people with the most common type of PKD progress to kidney failure, also called end-stage renal disease (ESRD).
PKD can also cause cysts in the liver and problems in other organs, such as blood vessels in the brain and heart. The number of cysts as well as the complications they cause help doctors distinguish PKD from the usually harmless "simple" cysts that often form in the kidneys in later years of life.


Thank you and God Bless!

I have tried and tried I no longer know what to do. I received sun burns on both arms and had tried to protect us. I am going through major heat stroke and trying to care for my family. Please help! This is a broken down list of what we need help with.

$140.00 Rent
$ 67.67 Power
$ 61.50 Cell phone
$75.00 for laundry
$ 120.00 for my brother’s dialysis medications
$400.00 Personal care for 5 people (my son, my brother, 2 of my daughters, and my-self) /Can accept things in care package email for a list of things.
$150.00 for fans
$200.00 for food would be awesome / can be sent in a care package or gift cards
$300.00 for my brothers food (renal diet)/ Can be sent in a care package (email for list of foods that are OK)

Even care packages sent by mail would be greatly appreciated.

I have 8 children biologically all together and can admit that with pride.
2 from my first marriage, both boys teenagers 15-16.
5 from my late boyfriend, 3 girls 2 boys ages 12-6. Their dad died on May 23, 2007
1 from a friend, a small male child 21 months now.

I love all my kids but not all currently live with me due to finances right now. And yes I am going to pay the price for the emotional part that will affect them due to this economy and my having to send them away.
I try my hardest but I cannot support them the way I used to and it breaks my heart.
Please help as I am now physically exhausted and spiritually drained.

E-mail for any questions you may have. angelswings2@yahoo.com
This is what my kid brother has:
Polycystic kidney disease (PKD) is a genetic disorder characterized by the growth of numerous cysts in the kidneys. The kidneys are two organs, each about the size of a fist, located in the upper part of a person's abdomen, toward the back. The kidneys filter wastes and extra fluid from the blood to form urine. They also regulate amounts of certain vital substances in the body. When cysts form in the kidneys, they are filled with fluid. PKD cysts can profoundly enlarge the kidneys while replacing much of the normal structure, resulting in reduced kidney function and leading to kidney failure.
When PKD causes kidneys to fail-which usually happens after many years-the patient requires dialysis or kidney transplantation. About one-half of people with the most common type of PKD progress to kidney failure, also called end-stage renal disease (ESRD).
PKD can also cause cysts in the liver and problems in other organs, such as blood vessels in the brain and heart. The number of cysts as well as the complications they cause help doctors distinguish PKD from the usually harmless "simple" cysts that often form in the kidneys in later years of life.


Thank you and God Bless!

I have tried and tried I no longer know what to do. I received sun burns on both arms and had tried to protect us. I am going through major heat stroke and trying to care for my family. Please help! This is a broken down list of what we need help with.

$140.00 Rent
$ 67.67 Power
$ 61.50 Cell phone
$75.00 for laundry
$ 120.00 for my brother’s dialysis medications
$400.00 Personal care for 5 people (my son, my brother, 2 of my daughters, and my-self) /Can accept things in care package email for a list of things.
$150.00 for fans
$200.00 for food would be awesome / can be sent in a care package or gift cards
$300.00 for my brothers food (renal diet)/ Can be sent in a care package (email for list of foods that are OK)

Even care packages sent by mail would be greatly appreciated.

I have 8 children biologically all together and can admit that with pride.
2 from my first marriage, both boys teenagers 15-16.
5 from my late boyfriend, 3 girls 2 boys ages 12-6. Their dad died on May 23, 2007
1 from a friend, a small male child 21 months now.

I love all my kids but not all currently live with me due to finances right now. And yes I am going to pay the price for the emotional part that will affect them due to this economy and my having to send them away.
I try my hardest but I cannot support them the way I used to and it breaks my heart.
Please help as I am now physically exhausted and spiritually drained.

E-mail for any questions you may have. angelswings2@yahoo.com
This is what my kid brother has:
Polycystic kidney disease (PKD) is a genetic disorder characterized by the growth of numerous cysts in the kidneys. The kidneys are two organs, each about the size of a fist, located in the upper part of a person's abdomen, toward the back. The kidneys filter wastes and extra fluid from the blood to form urine. They also regulate amounts of certain vital substances in the body. When cysts form in the kidneys, they are filled with fluid. PKD cysts can profoundly enlarge the kidneys while replacing much of the normal structure, resulting in reduced kidney function and leading to kidney failure.
When PKD causes kidneys to fail-which usually happens after many years-the patient requires dialysis or kidney transplantation. About one-half of people with the most common type of PKD progress to kidney failure, also called end-stage renal disease (ESRD).
PKD can also cause cysts in the liver and problems in other organs, such as blood vessels in the brain and heart. The number of cysts as well as the complications they cause help doctors distinguish PKD from the usually harmless "simple" cysts that often form in the kidneys in later years of life.


Thank you and God Bless!

I have tried and tried I no longer know what to do. I received sun burns on both arms and had tried to protect us. I am going through major heat stroke and trying to care for my family. Please help! This is a broken down list of what we need help with.

$140.00 Rent
$ 67.67 Power
$ 61.50 Cell phone
$75.00 for laundry
$ 120.00 for my brother’s dialysis medications
$400.00 Personal care for 5 people (my son, my brother, 2 of my daughters, and my-self) /Can accept things in care package email for a list of things.
$150.00 for fans
$200.00 for food would be awesome / can be sent in a care package or gift cards
$300.00 for my brothers food (renal diet)/ Can be sent in a care package (email for list of foods that are OK)

Even care packages sent by mail would be greatly appreciated.

I have 8 children biologically all together and can admit that with pride.
2 from my first marriage, both boys teenagers 15-16.
5 from my late boyfriend, 3 girls 2 boys ages 12-6. Their dad died on May 23, 2007
1 from a friend, a small male child 21 months now.

I love all my kids but not all currently live with me due to finances right now. And yes I am going to pay the price for the emotional part that will affect them due to this economy and my having to send them away.
I try my hardest but I cannot support them the way I used to and it breaks my heart.
Please help as I am now physically exhausted and spiritually drained.

E-mail for any questions you may have. angelswings2@yahoo.com
This is what my kid brother has:
Polycystic kidney disease (PKD) is a genetic disorder characterized by the growth of numerous cysts in the kidneys. The kidneys are two organs, each about the size of a fist, located in the upper part of a person's abdomen, toward the back. The kidneys filter wastes and extra fluid from the blood to form urine. They also regulate amounts of certain vital substances in the body. When cysts form in the kidneys, they are filled with fluid. PKD cysts can profoundly enlarge the kidneys while replacing much of the normal structure, resulting in reduced kidney function and leading to kidney failure.
When PKD causes kidneys to fail-which usually happens after many years-the patient requires dialysis or kidney transplantation. About one-half of people with the most common type of PKD progress to kidney failure, also called end-stage renal disease (ESRD).
PKD can also cause cysts in the liver and problems in other organs, such as blood vessels in the brain and heart. The number of cysts as well as the complications they cause help doctors distinguish PKD from the usually harmless "simple" cysts that often form in the kidneys in later years of life.


Thank you and God Bless!

I have tried and tried I no longer know what to do. I received sun burns on both arms and had tried to protect us. I am going through major heat stroke and trying to care for my family. Please help! This is a broken down list of what we need help with.

$140.00 Rent
$ 67.67 Power
$ 61.50 Cell phone
$75.00 for laundry
$ 120.00 for my brother’s dialysis medications
$400.00 Personal care for 5 people (my son, my brother, 2 of my daughters, and my-self) /Can accept things in care package email for a list of things.
$150.00 for fans
$200.00 for food would be awesome / can be sent in a care package or gift cards
$300.00 for my brothers food (renal diet)/ Can be sent in a care package (email for list of foods that are OK)

Even care packages sent by mail would be greatly appreciated.

I have 8 children biologically all together and can admit that with pride.
2 from my first marriage, both boys teenagers 15-16.
5 from my late boyfriend, 3 girls 2 boys ages 12-6. Their dad died on May 23, 2007
1 from a friend, a small male child 21 months now.

I love all my kids but not all currently live with me due to finances right now. And yes I am going to pay the price for the emotional part that will affect them due to this economy and my having to send them away.
I try my hardest but I cannot support them the way I used to and it breaks my heart.
Please help as I am now physically exhausted and spiritually drained.

E-mail for any questions you may have. angelswings2@yahoo.com
This is what my kid brother has:
Polycystic kidney disease (PKD) is a genetic disorder characterized by the growth of numerous cysts in the kidneys. The kidneys are two organs, each about the size of a fist, located in the upper part of a person's abdomen, toward the back. The kidneys filter wastes and extra fluid from the blood to form urine. They also regulate amounts of certain vital substances in the body. When cysts form in the kidneys, they are filled with fluid. PKD cysts can profoundly enlarge the kidneys while replacing much of the normal structure, resulting in reduced kidney function and leading to kidney failure.
When PKD causes kidneys to fail-which usually happens after many years-the patient requires dialysis or kidney transplantation. About one-half of people with the most common type of PKD progress to kidney failure, also called end-stage renal disease (ESRD).
PKD can also cause cysts in the liver and problems in other organs, such as blood vessels in the brain and heart. The number of cysts as well as the complications they cause help doctors distinguish PKD from the usually harmless "simple" cysts that often form in the kidneys in later years of life.


Thank you and God Bless!

I have tried and tried I no longer know what to do. I received sun burns on both arms and had tried to protect us. I am going through major heat stroke and trying to care for my family. Please help! This is a broken down list of what I need help with.

$140.00 Rent
$ 67.67 Power
$ 61.50 Cell phone
$100.00 for laundry
$400.00 Personal care for 5 people/Can accept things in care package email for a list of things.
$150.00-$200.00 for fans
$200.00 for food would be awesome
$300.00 for my brothers food(renal diet)/ Can be sent in a care package (email for list of foods that are OK)

Even care packages sent by mail would be appreciated. I have a child who is turning 6 in a week and He knows I am trying my best but have nothing for him, I would like to change that with help.

I have 8 children all together and can admit that with pride.
2 from my first marriage, both boys teenagers 15-16.
5 from my late boyfriend, 3 girls 2 boys 12-6. Their dad died on May 23, 2007
1 from a friend, small male child 20 months.

I love all my kids but not all currently live with me due to finances right now. And yes I am going to pay the price for the emotional part that will effect them due to this economy and my having to send them away.
I try my hardest but I can not support them the way I used to and it breaks my heart.
I would have been out pan handling today but with heat stroke they want me to stay home and rest.

Please help as I am now physically exhausted and spiritually drained.

email for any questions you may have. angelswings2@yahoo.com
Melissa

I have tried and tried I no longer know what to do. I received sun burns on both arms and had tried to protect us. I am going through major heat stroke and trying to care for my family. Please help! This is a broken down list of what I need help with.

$140.00 Rent
$ 67.67 Power
$ 61.50 Cell phone
$100.00 for laundry
$400.00 Personal care for 5 people/Can accept things in care package email for a list of things.
$150.00-$200.00 for fans
$200.00 for food would be awesome
$300.00 for my brothers food(renal diet)/ Can be sent in a care package (email for list of foods that are OK)

Even care packages sent by mail would be appreciated. I have a child who is turning 6 in a week and He knows I am trying my best but have nothing for him, I would like to change that with help.

I have 8 children all together and can admit that with pride.
2 from my first marriage, both boys teenagers 15-16.
5 from my late boyfriend, 3 girls 2 boys 12-6. Their dad died on May 23, 2007
1 from a friend, small male child 20 months.

I love all my kids but not all currently live with me due to finances right now. And yes I am going to pay the price for the emotional part that will effect them due to this economy and my having to send them away.
I try my hardest but I can not support them the way I used to and it breaks my heart.
I would have been out pan handling today but with heat stroke they want me to stay home and rest.

Please help as I am now physically exhausted and spiritually drained.

email for any questions you may have. angelswings2@yahoo.com
Melissa

I have tried and tried I no longer know what to do. I received sun burns on both arms and had tried to protect us. I am going through major heat stroke and trying to care for my family. Please help! This is a broken down list of what I need help with.

$140.00 Rent
$ 67.67 Power
$ 61.50 Cell phone
$100.00 for laundry
$400.00 Personal care for 5 people/Can accept things in care package email for a list of things.
$150.00-$200.00 for fans
$200.00 for food would be awesome
$300.00 for my brothers food(renal diet)/ Can be sent in a care package (email for list of foods that are OK)

Even care packages sent by mail would be appreciated. I have a child who is turning 6 in a week and He knows I am trying my best but have nothing for him, I would like to change that with help.

I have 8 children all together and can admit that with pride.
2 from my first marriage, both boys teenagers 15-16.
5 from my late boyfriend, 3 girls 2 boys 12-6. Their dad died on May 23, 2007
1 from a friend, small male child 20 months.

I love all my kids but not all currently live with me due to finances right now. And yes I am going to pay the price for the emotional part that will effect them due to this economy and my having to send them away.
I try my hardest but I can not support them the way I used to and it breaks my heart.
I would have been out pan handling today but with heat stroke they want me to stay home and rest.

Please help as I am now physically exhausted and spiritually drained.

email for any questions you may have. angelswings2@yahoo.com
Melissa

I have tried and tried I no longer know what to do. I received sun burns on both arms and had tried to protect us. I am going through major heat stroke and trying to care for my family. Please help! This is a broken down list of what I need help with.

$140.00 Rent
$ 67.67 Power
$ 61.50 Cell phone
$100.00 for laundry
$400.00 Personal care for 5 people/Can accept things in care package email for a list of things.
$150.00-$200.00 for fans
$200.00 for food would be awesome
$300.00 for my brothers food(renal diet)/ Can be sent in a care package (email for list of foods that are OK)

Even care packages sent by mail would be appreciated. I have a child who is turning 6 in a week and He knows I am trying my best but have nothing for him, I would like to change that with help.

I have 8 children all together and can admit that with pride.
2 from my first marriage, both boys teenagers 15-16.
5 from my late boyfriend, 3 girls 2 boys 12-6. Their dad died on May 23, 2007
1 from a friend, small male child 20 months.

I love all my kids but not all currently live with me due to finances right now. And yes I am going to pay the price for the emotional part that will effect them due to this economy and my having to send them away.
I try my hardest but I can not support them the way I used to and it breaks my heart.
I would have been out pan handling today but with heat stroke they want me to stay home and rest.

Please help as I am now physically exhausted and spiritually drained.

email for any questions you may have. angelswings2@yahoo.com
Melissa

I have tried and tried I no longer know what to do. I received sun burns on both arms and had tried to protect us. I am going through major heat stroke and trying to care for my family. Please help! This is a broken down list of what I need help with.

$140.00 Rent
$ 67.67 Power
$ 61.50 Cell phone
$100.00 for laundry
$400.00 Personal care for 5 people/Can accept things in care package email for a list of things.
$150.00-$200.00 for fans
$200.00 for food would be awesome
$300.00 for my brothers food(renal diet)/ Can be sent in a care package (email for list of foods that are OK)

Even care packages sent by mail would be appreciated. I have a child who is turning 6 in a week and He knows I am trying my best but have nothing for him, I would like to change that with help.

I have 8 children all together and can admit that with pride.
2 from my first marriage, both boys teenagers 15-16.
5 from my late boyfriend, 3 girls 2 boys 12-6. Their dad died on May 23, 2007
1 from a friend, small male child 20 months.

I love all my kids but not all currently live with me due to finances right now. And yes I am going to pay the price for the emotional part that will effect them due to this economy and my having to send them away.
I try my hardest but I can not support them the way I used to and it breaks my heart.
I would have been out pan handling today but with heat stroke they want me to stay home and rest.

Please help as I am now physically exhausted and spiritually drained.

email for any questions you may have. angelswings2@yahoo.com
Melissa

I have tried and tried I no longer know what to do. I received sun burns on both arms and had tried to protect us. I am going through major heat stroke and trying to care for my family. Please help! This is a broken down list of what I need help with.

$140.00 Rent
$ 67.67 Power
$ 61.50 Cell phone
$100.00 for laundry
$400.00 Personal care for 5 people/Can accept things in care package email for a list of things.
$150.00-$200.00 for fans
$200.00 for food would be awesome
$300.00 for my brothers food(renal diet)/ Can be sent in a care package (email for list of foods that are OK)

Even care packages sent by mail would be appreciated. I have a child who is turning 6 in a week and He knows I am trying my best but have nothing for him, I would like to change that with help.

I have 8 children all together and can admit that with pride.
2 from my first marriage, both boys teenagers 15-16.
5 from my late boyfriend, 3 girls 2 boys 12-6. Their dad died on May 23, 2007
1 from a friend, small male child 20 months.

I love all my kids but not all currently live with me due to finances right now. And yes I am going to pay the price for the emotional part that will effect them due to this economy and my having to send them away.
I try my hardest but I can not support them the way I used to and it breaks my heart.
I would have been out pan handling today but with heat stroke they want me to stay home and rest.

Please help as I am now physically exhausted and spiritually drained.

email for any questions you may have. angelswings2@yahoo.com
Melissa

I have tried and tried I no longer know what to do. I received sun burns on both arms and had tried to protect us. I am going through major heat stroke and trying to care for my family. Please help! This is a broken down list of what I need help with.

$140.00 Rent
$ 67.67 Power
$ 61.50 Cell phone
$100.00 for laundry
$400.00 Personal care for 5 people/Can accept things in care package email for a list of things.
$150.00-$200.00 for fans
$200.00 for food would be awesome
$300.00 for my brothers food(renal diet)/ Can be sent in a care package (email for list of foods that are OK)

Even care packages sent by mail would be appreciated. I have a child who is turning 6 in a week and He knows I am trying my best but have nothing for him, I would like to change that with help.

I have 8 children all together and can admit that with pride.
2 from my first marriage, both boys teenagers 15-16.
5 from my late boyfriend, 3 girls 2 boys 12-6. Their dad died on May 23, 2007
1 from a friend, small male child 20 months.

I love all my kids but not all currently live with me due to finances right now. And yes I am going to pay the price for the emotional part that will effect them due to this economy and my having to send them away.
I try my hardest but I can not support them the way I used to and it breaks my heart.
I would have been out pan handling today but with heat stroke they want me to stay home and rest.

Please help as I am now physically exhausted and spiritually drained.

email for any questions you may have. angelswings2@yahoo.com
Melissa

I have tried and tried I no longer know what to do. I received sun burns on both arms and had tried to protect us. I am going through major heat stroke and trying to care for my family. Please help! This is a broken down list of what I need help with.

$140.00 Rent
$ 67.67 Power
$ 61.50 Cell phone
$100.00 for laundry
$400.00 Personal care for 5 people/Can accept things in care package email for a list of things.
$150.00-$200.00 for fans
$200.00 for food would be awesome
$300.00 for my brothers food(renal diet)/ Can be sent in a care package (email for list of foods that are OK)

Even care packages sent by mail would be appreciated. I have a child who is turning 6 in a week and He knows I am trying my best but have nothing for him, I would like to change that with help.

I have 8 children all together and can admit that with pride.
2 from my first marriage, both boys teenagers 15-16.
5 from my late boyfriend, 3 girls 2 boys 12-6. Their dad died on May 23, 2007
1 from a friend, small male child 20 months.

I love all my kids but not all currently live with me due to finances right now. And yes I am going to pay the price for the emotional part that will effect them due to this economy and my having to send them away.
I try my hardest but I can not support them the way I used to and it breaks my heart.
I would have been out pan handling today but with heat stroke they want me to stay home and rest.

Please help as I am now physically exhausted and spiritually drained.

email for any questions you may have. angelswings2@yahoo.com
Melissa

I am a 36 year old single mother of two awesome teenagers and I'm trying to fulfill a life long dream by going back to school.

For as long as I can remember I have always wanted to be an archaeologist and history professor as well as wanting to move to Norway since first reading the Prose Edda at the age of 11. Unfortunately those dreams got put on hold when I had my first child at the age of 19 and my second at 21. My children are now 15 and 17 and about to go off to university and begin their own lives and so it is time for me to revisit my dreams. This is going to consist of 3 steps each of wish I need help funding as I do not qualify for student loans/grants and cannot afford to quit my job to be elligible.

As the first step in this process I have been accepted to the University of Leicester to begin work on my BA in Ancient History and Classical Archaeology and am scheduled to begin classes on June 4th 2012 via distance education. In total the 3 year course will cost £10,350 with £1150 installments due every January, May and September 1st. Along with this one module requires me to go to England in year 2 for field school at Borrough Hill as well as a second trip over in year 3 for lab work. There is also an option to make a third trip for the graduation ceremony if funding allows. Each of these trips will cost roughly $2500 - $3000.

The second step in this plan is to complete a Master's degree in Nordic Viking and Medievil Studies at the University of Oslo in Norway. At this time UiO does not have tuition fees however they do require that international students have NOK 80,000 (roughly $13,500) per year of study. And Norwegian law prevents international students outside the EU from working while persuing their studies.

Finally the third step in the process much like the second involves doing further studies at UiO in the form of persuing a PhD in a topic related to Viking Metallurgy.

I have already taken steps to start covering costs on my own by working as much overtime as I can get (though this option is going to be limited once school starts as I will need to focus on school work) as well as moving from the house I was renting to a smaller, cheaper apartment with a roomate to cut costs. Unfortunately these measures alone aren't going to be enough to get me there. Any help you could give would be very much appreciated.

To my babies,

1) You will always be safe.
2 There is no such thing as a Boogie Man.
3) You can always come home.
4) I will always be here for you.
5) There will always be laughter and singing and dancing.
6) The sun always comes up,even on cloudy days.
7) You will never have to worry, I can fix it.
8) Study hard and you will go somewhere in life.
9) Be good to yourself and others.
10) When you're wrong, say your sorry.

16 years that flew by...

To my teenagers,

1) Danger may find you, be stronger, faster, and smarter.
2) You will sometimes be afraid, but I will comfort you.
3) Home is where your heart is, no matter where, no matter the circumstances that seperate you.
4) I will always be where you are when you need me.
5) There may be days of quiet and the dancing subdued, but sometimes you see a rainbow on the rainiest days.
6) Sometimes the sun stays hidden behind the clouds, but its warmth is still felt down here on the ground.
7) Sometimes you have to fix it yourself, but I will stand beside your while you try.
8) Study hard anyway, even if your dreams are not what you wished for, the journey there is the just a small twist in the road.
9) Love with integrity and honor, even when it's difficult, even when it's not returned. Believe in love.
10) Forgive yourself when you ask others to forgive you. You are worth it.

I hope you will not see the struggles we face, the house we are in danger of losing, or the tears on my pillow late at night. I hope you never see my quiet desperation and uncertainty. I hope you never know that I’ve lost my job to budget cuts 5 times, just like I have now. I hope you cannot see the moments of hopelessness in my heart and how much I have aged in such a short time. I hope you remember how strong your Mama is and how I would do anything for you both. There is no SuperMom, just an ordinary Mom in extraordinary circumstances. And one last thing…..when you are given to, it is always with a promise that you will in some way give back.

Love, Love, Love,

The Third Musketeer

Please help us. Thank you

To my babies,

1) You will always be safe.
2 There is no such thing as a Boogie Man.
3) You can always come home.
4) I will always be here for you.
5) There will always be laughter and singing and dancing.
6) The sun always comes up,even on cloudy days.
7) You will never have to worry, I can fix it.
8) Study hard and you will go somewhere in life.
9) Be good to yourself and others.
10) When you're wrong, say your sorry.

16 years that flew by...

To my teenagers,

1) Danger may find you, be stronger, faster, and smarter.
2) You will sometimes be afraid, but I will comfort you.
3) Home is where your heart is, no matter where, no matter the circumstances that seperate you.
4) I will always be where you are when you need me.
5) There may be days of quiet and the dancing subdued, but sometimes you see a rainbow on the rainiest days.
6) Sometimes the sun stays hidden behind the clouds, but its warmth is still felt down here on the ground.
7) Sometimes you have to fix it yourself, but I will stand beside your while you try.
8) Study hard anyway, even if your dreams are not what you wished for, the journey there is the just a small twist in the road.
9) Love with integrity and honor, even when it's difficult, even when it's not returned. Believe in love.
10) Forgive yourself when you ask others to forgive you. You are worth it.

I hope you will not see the struggles we face, the house we are in danger of losing, or the tears on my pillow late at night. I hope you never see my quiet desperation and uncertainty. I hope you never know that I’ve lost my job to budget cuts 5 times, just like I have now. I hope you cannot see the moments of hopelessness in my heart and how much I have aged in such a short time. I hope you remember how strong your Mama is and how I would do anything for you both. There is no SuperMom, just an ordinary Mom in extraordinary circumstances. And one last thing…..when you are given to, it is always with a promise that you will in some way give back.

Love, Love, Love,

The Third Musketeer

Please help us. Thank you

To my babies,

1) You will always be safe.
2 There is no such thing as a Boogie Man.
3) You can always come home.
4) I will always be here for you.
5) There will always be laughter and singing and dancing.
6) The sun always comes up,even on cloudy days.
7) You will never have to worry, I can fix it.
8) Study hard and you will go somewhere in life.
9) Be good to yourself and others.
10) When you're wrong, say your sorry.

16 years that flew by...

To my teenagers,

1) Danger may find you, be stronger, faster, and smarter.
2) You will sometimes be afraid, but I will comfort you.
3) Home is where your heart is, no matter where, no matter the circumstances that seperate you.
4) I will always be where you are when you need me.
5) There may be days of quiet and the dancing subdued, but sometimes you see a rainbow on the rainiest days.
6) Sometimes the sun stays hidden behind the clouds, but its warmth is still felt down here on the ground.
7) Sometimes you have to fix it yourself, but I will stand beside your while you try.
8) Study hard anyway, even if your dreams are not what you wished for, the journey there is the just a small twist in the road.
9) Love with integrity and honor, even when it's difficult, even when it's not returned. Believe in love.
10) Forgive yourself when you ask others to forgive you. You are worth it.

I hope you will not see the struggles we face, the house we are in danger of losing, or the tears on my pillow late at night. I hope you never see my quiet desperation and uncertainty. I hope you never know that I’ve lost my job to budget cuts 5 times, just like I have now. I hope you cannot see the moments of hopelessness in my heart and how much I have aged in such a short time. I hope you remember how strong your Mama is and how I would do anything for you both. There is no SuperMom, just an ordinary Mom in extraordinary circumstances. And one last thing…..when you are given to, it is always with a promise that you will in some way give back.

Love, Love, Love,

The Third Musketeer

Please help us. Thank you

Please help! My daughter and I are tryin to open a daycare for teenagers and low income parents who can't afford regular tuition. Please help us with any amount of donation to make someone dream come true. I will let you how the progress is goin through every donation. Thanks for your help.

When I purchased this home back in 2004 after finally getting away from an extremely abusive marriage, all I could see was that the price was right and that I would finally be safe - hundreds of miles away from my now ex-husband. As a single mother of 3 children on a limited income, I saw how I would be able to live completely mortgage and rent free. I didn't however see the major repairs that this house required - nor did I have the money to make such repairs. Over time, of course things got worse - and it brings me up to the point of where I am today.

The roof on this house is so badly deteriorated that it is leaking very badly in the downstairs bathroom, dining room, kitchen and front door areas. It has leaked so badly that now mold has started to form in the bathroom ceiling and the drywall has slowly been falling away on the one wall. The slightest wind and you will find shingles blown off and laying on the ground. The roof is so bad that I am fearful that even the boards underneath the shingles may need to be replaced.

Realize that this is my last resort in trying to come up with the funds required to get this new roof. I have tried applying to government grants for home improvement but unfortunately I do not qualify because 1. my property taxes are not paid up to date (I owe approximately $2000 just in property taxes), and 2. the size of the house is larger than the specified guideline parameters. Nor do I qualify for a loan of any sort as 1. I make a mere $200 a month working and 2. have bad past credit (being a single mom has taken some serious tolls on me - including financially!).

So the goal here is to get a new roof installed - and as soon as possible so that any further damage to the house is avoided. I also worry about the mold forming in the bathroom especially and one day the roof caving in in there. While my children have grown to teenagers now, I still have to worry about their health.

I have uploaded pictures and this story at Chip-In to show you the extent of the damage done especially in the bathroom area - and a view of the shingles as they are right now on the roof. Admittedly I realize that my house also needs some repair on the stucco, windows and such but right now my main concern is the roof. I'm surprised it hasn't caved in on me by now.

I thank everyone in advance for helping me with this. I do not normally like asking for help from anyone but at this point I am finding that I have no other alternative.

Please view photos of the damage, etc at my Chip-In page at http://escapetofreedom.chipin.com/imperative-home-repairs

I am a recent Volunteer At saint Joseph Hospice in Rawalpindi,Pakistan and a member of Pakistan Red Crescent Society.I am Regular Blood Donor For The last 1 year.The hospice is located in the heart of Westridge but my home is somewhat around 35 km away ,i admit that i belong to a middle class family but due to some family health problems i am now being told that we cannot afford your travel expenses which is 5000-6000 Pkr plus i have to got PCRS on several times a week.

There are only 3 three volunteers excluding me and we have to attend couple of depressed people (suicidal s) , handicapped and bed sores patients and at the play with some orphans as well ,total beds are about 60.Sisters are highly corporative and there staff as well but still being a 18 years old teenagers the fun is still better then the aged ones.
Please Please Please help (donate) me to be a better person and a great friend. donation of any number will be helpful but still if you have some questions regarding my activities please call me at 923085555940 .Paypal doesn't work in Pakistan but Western union or money gram are available in Pakistan.
You may also email me at Hamzaqaseem92@yahoo.com

I am a recent Volunteer At saint Joseph Hospice in Rawalpindi,Pakistan and a member of Pakistan Red Crescent Society.I am Regular Blood Donor For The last 1 year.The hospice is located in the heart of Westridge but my home is somewhat around 35 km away ,i admit that i belong to a middle class family but due to some family health problems i am now being told that we cannot afford your travel expenses which is 5000-6000 Pkr plus i have to got PCRS on several times a week.

There are only 3 three volunteers excluding me and we have to attend couple of depressed people (suicidal s) , handicapped and bed sores patients and at the play with some orphans as well ,total beds are about 60.Sisters are highly corporative and there staff as well but still being a 18 years old teenagers the fun is still better then the aged ones.
Please Please Please help (donate) me to be a better person and a great friend. donation of any number will be helpful but still if you have some questions regarding my activities please call me at 923085555940 .Paypal doesn't work in Pakistan but Western union or money gram are available in Pakistan.
You may also email me at Hamzaqaseem92@yahoo.com

I have been on disability for several years now, primarily for bipolar disorder, but also from back and neck injuries sustained from being hit by a drunk driver on new year's eve several years ago. I barely make enough to cover my bills and to buy food to eat, and there is never anything left over, and often there isn't enough, leaving me having to beg for money from friends or family members, who often don't have it and can't give anything. I have been stuck at home for years because I cannot even afford gas to go out in town unless I have to go to the doctor, grocery store, drug store, etc. I do not even want to think about trying to meet a person for a relationship because I feel like I have nothing to offer someone when I can barely take care of myself. Sometimes the despair makes me just want to lie in bed and never get up or swallow a bottle of pills so it will all be over. Living a lonely solitary life is killing me. I have a college degree in psychology and have worked my entire adult life trying to help adults, teenagers, and children to have better lives for themselves, and now I am stuck in the boat where many of them have been, where I feel like there's no hope. I had a lot of problems working also because I live in the southern US where not only racism is rampant (though I'm white), but they also treat people like me the same as they do blacks, and by that I mean people who are bisexual, or open-minded, or who people assume to be gay. I have been fired from jobs, harassed, threatened, passed over for jobs, etc., to the point that years ago I got sick of even trying to work in such a hostile environment when all I ever did was accept everyone and try to help anyone in need. I could never fathom why everybody hated me so much just from general assumptions that I "might" be gay, having never told anyone anything, though I have had relationships with men and women. People here are so anti-gay that it is downright dangerous to make yourself known. They will create vicious lies and rumors to try to destroy your life, will not hire you for jobs, will fire you, threaten and harass you. Further, ever since I was a young boy, I have also been physically abused because of this. White trash rednecks love to do this, and it has been done to me many times-they will kidnap you, drag you off into the woods, tie you to a tree or down in the back of a truck or string you up between two trees, or even act like they're going to hang you, and then they gang rape you, and then they threaten to kill you and your family if you ever tell on them. And you can't go to the police because they're usually there raping you too. I've had to call in the FBI on them several times, and the National Guard has even had to show its presence in our town before because these vigilante KKK rednecks are so threatening towards anybody who isn't a redneck. They think there's only 2 kinds of people, rednecks and queers. Or whites and blacks. I'm white but they label me a queer, and to them, that's just as bad as being black. So therefore, they beat me and rape me. My mother taught me at a young age to play dead, and I had to do it several times growing up. I also had to play like Brer Rabbit and tell them to please not leave me in the woods or I might die, but it's what I wanted because I was a boy scout and I knew I could survive if they'd just leave me alone and let me live. They even had a hand in killing my mother many years ago, and they also kill anyone who gets close to trying to expose them. You learn to stay away from them and to keep your mouth shut and maybe they'll let you live and find somebody else to rape and abuse. By the way, I'm in southern Alabama, in Washington County, and in surrounding counties it's the same. Besides wanting to be able to have a decent life, I want to get out of this area and be free for the first time in my life. Even while in college and working as an adult, I've encountered more redneck KKK vigilantes, both male and female, always hellbent on killing queers, as they say it. I want to be able to afford to move somewhere else, preferably to Florida or to California, to a place where nobody knows me and maybe I can hide out and start over, and also where people are more accepting of people who choose to not be a redneck. I am tired of being hated for being a perfectly normal human being. I know from college that we are all bisexual creatures and that there is nothing wrong with me. Hell, these rednecks are raping young boys, so they're the queers and child molesters, so why the hell would they be threatening me? The answer is because they want to be free to rape and molest whoever they want and they always get away with it, because this area is full of corrupt police and sheriffs and politicians and wealthy townfolk who can get away with murder repeatedly. I just want out, so please help me to be able to move to a safer environment so that I might live a decent and normal life one day, and so I might also can bring myself out of depression and learn to walk in the sun again and hopefully also find love like I want and not be afraid to feel and express my emotions. I cannot believe that in 2012 they have such control over everyone in the redneck south to the point that people are afraid to live normal lives. And yes, every single word of this is true, so please help. At the rate I'm going, I'll never be able to afford to move elsewhere and to get away from this hellhole called southern Alabama. Even in the last several years, I was near our local river at the boat landing parking lot talking to a friend when the police showed up and started to harass us and called us queers for being two men talking in a parking lot. He then made us stay there and called two friends of his to come there, and while the policeman held a gun on us, they raped me and made me give the two redneck men blow jobs and kept slamming the truck door on my head and punching and kicking me. I did successfully get that policeman moved to another town after I went to the hospital after I was raped, but he wasn't fired. The other two men were never tried for their crimes, but someone did end up murdering one of them. This place is awful, you just have no idea. Another incident I'll tell you about before I end this is one weekend I was working a new part time job on top of my full time job at a maximum security mental hospital. My boss at work, a nurse, had a brother who owned a lake, and he needed someone to take care of general maintenance and help out guests and such. Well to try to me out, they had me stay there one weekend, in my own cabin, with just one guest on the lake, and he was in a cabin down the hill. Well, I found out during the course of this weekend that the nurse and her brother were in the KKK and this man staying at the lake had paid them to be able to hunt him a real life queer at the lake. So he kept harassing me and threatening me and coming to my cabin at night with his guns and even one time chased me down the pier and I had to jump into the lake fully clothed, wallet, shoes, jeans, and all, swimming as deep as I could and moving side to side and spinning underwater because this psycho man was shooting bullets at me! I felt like I was in a movie, and I thankfully didn't get hit but several bullets whizzed by me underwater, and I held my breath and swam clear across the lake underwater and only came up when I had to because I had no breath left, and I had to spend the entire night hiding among the lilypads with my head barely sticking out of the water, for fear that he might see me, even though I was across the lake and there wasn't enough moonlight for him to see me from that far away. I was freezing and sick by the next morning, not to mention having a nervous breakdown after being hunted. My brother and his fiance' got me a lawyer and we were advised by him not to pursue it or they would murder us all. The nurse even admitted to the setup at work the next week, and was surprised that I had shown back up, because she figured I'd have been bagged by the hunter.

I have been on disability for several years now, primarily for bipolar disorder, but also from back and neck injuries sustained from being hit by a drunk driver on new year's eve several years ago. I barely make enough to cover my bills and to buy food to eat, and there is never anything left over, and often there isn't enough, leaving me having to beg for money from friends or family members, who often don't have it and can't give anything. I have been stuck at home for years because I cannot even afford gas to go out in town unless I have to go to the doctor, grocery store, drug store, etc. I do not even want to think about trying to meet a person for a relationship because I feel like I have nothing to offer someone when I can barely take care of myself. Sometimes the despair makes me just want to lie in bed and never get up or swallow a bottle of pills so it will all be over. Living a lonely solitary life is killing me. I have a college degree in psychology and have worked my entire adult life trying to help adults, teenagers, and children to have better lives for themselves, and now I am stuck in the boat where many of them have been, where I feel like there's no hope. I had a lot of problems working also because I live in the southern US where not only racism is rampant (though I'm white), but they also treat people like me the same as they do blacks, and by that I mean people who are bisexual, or open-minded, or who people assume to be gay. I have been fired from jobs, harassed, threatened, passed over for jobs, etc., to the point that years ago I got sick of even trying to work in such a hostile environment when all I ever did was accept everyone and try to help anyone in need. I could never fathom why everybody hated me so much just from general assumptions that I "might" be gay, having never told anyone anything, though I have had relationships with men and women. People here are so anti-gay that it is downright dangerous to make yourself known. They will create vicious lies and rumors to try to destroy your life, will not hire you for jobs, will fire you, threaten and harass you. Further, ever since I was a young boy, I have also been physically abused because of this. White trash rednecks love to do this, and it has been done to me many times-they will kidnap you, drag you off into the woods, tie you to a tree or down in the back of a truck or string you up between two trees, or even act like they're going to hang you, and then they gang rape you, and then they threaten to kill you and your family if you ever tell on them. And you can't go to the police because they're usually there raping you too. I've had to call in the FBI on them several times, and the National Guard has even had to show its presence in our town before because these vigilante KKK rednecks are so threatening towards anybody who isn't a redneck. They think there's only 2 kinds of people, rednecks and queers. Or whites and blacks. I'm white but they label me a queer, and to them, that's just as bad as being black. So therefore, they beat me and rape me. My mother taught me at a young age to play dead, and I had to do it several times growing up. I also had to play like Brer Rabbit and tell them to please not leave me in the woods or I might die, but it's what I wanted because I was a boy scout and I knew I could survive if they'd just leave me alone and let me live. They even had a hand in killing my mother many years ago, and they also kill anyone who gets close to trying to expose them. You learn to stay away from them and to keep your mouth shut and maybe they'll let you live and find somebody else to rape and abuse. By the way, I'm in southern Alabama, in Washington County, and in surrounding counties it's the same. Besides wanting to be able to have a decent life, I want to get out of this area and be free for the first time in my life. Even while in college and working as an adult, I've encountered more redneck KKK vigilantes, both male and female, always hellbent on killing queers, as they say it. I want to be able to afford to move somewhere else, preferably to Florida or to California, to a place where nobody knows me and maybe I can hide out and start over, and also where people are more accepting of people who choose to not be a redneck. I am tired of being hated for being a perfectly normal human being. I know from college that we are all bisexual creatures and that there is nothing wrong with me. Hell, these rednecks are raping young boys, so they're the queers and child molesters, so why the hell would they be threatening me? The answer is because they want to be free to rape and molest whoever they want and they always get away with it, because this area is full of corrupt police and sheriffs and politicians and wealthy townfolk who can get away with murder repeatedly. I just want out, so please help me to be able to move to a safer environment so that I might live a decent and normal life one day, and so I might also can bring myself out of depression and learn to walk in the sun again and hopefully also find love like I want and not be afraid to feel and express my emotions. I cannot believe that in 2012 they have such control over everyone in the redneck south to the point that people are afraid to live normal lives. And yes, every single word of this is true, so please help. At the rate I'm going, I'll never be able to afford to move elsewhere and to get away from this hellhole called southern Alabama. Even in the last several years, I was near our local river at the boat landing parking lot talking to a friend when the police showed up and started to harass us and called us queers for being two men talking in a parking lot. He then made us stay there and called two friends of his to come there, and while the policeman held a gun on us, they raped me and made me give the two redneck men blow jobs and kept slamming the truck door on my head and punching and kicking me. I did successfully get that policeman moved to another town after I went to the hospital after I was raped, but he wasn't fired. The other two men were never tried for their crimes, but someone did end up murdering one of them. This place is awful, you just have no idea. Another incident I'll tell you about before I end this is one weekend I was working a new part time job on top of my full time job at a maximum security mental hospital. My boss at work, a nurse, had a brother who owned a lake, and he needed someone to take care of general maintenance and help out guests and such. Well to try to me out, they had me stay there one weekend, in my own cabin, with just one guest on the lake, and he was in a cabin down the hill. Well, I found out during the course of this weekend that the nurse and her brother were in the KKK and this man staying at the lake had paid them to be able to hunt him a real life queer at the lake. So he kept harassing me and threatening me and coming to my cabin at night with his guns and even one time chased me down the pier and I had to jump into the lake fully clothed, wallet, shoes, jeans, and all, swimming as deep as I could and moving side to side and spinning underwater because this psycho man was shooting bullets at me! I felt like I was in a movie, and I thankfully didn't get hit but several bullets whizzed by me underwater, and I held my breath and swam clear across the lake underwater and only came up when I had to because I had no breath left, and I had to spend the entire night hiding among the lilypads with my head barely sticking out of the water, for fear that he might see me, even though I was across the lake and there wasn't enough moonlight for him to see me from that far away. I was freezing and sick by the next morning, not to mention having a nervous breakdown after being hunted. My brother and his fiance' got me a lawyer and we were advised by him not to pursue it or they would murder us all. The nurse even admitted to the setup at work the next week, and was surprised that I had shown back up, because she figured I'd have been bagged by the hunter.

I have been on disability for several years now, primarily for bipolar disorder, but also from back and neck injuries sustained from being hit by a drunk driver on new year's eve several years ago. I barely make enough to cover my bills and to buy food to eat, and there is never anything left over, and often there isn't enough, leaving me having to beg for money from friends or family members, who often don't have it and can't give anything. I have been stuck at home for years because I cannot even afford gas to go out in town unless I have to go to the doctor, grocery store, drug store, etc. I do not even want to think about trying to meet a person for a relationship because I feel like I have nothing to offer someone when I can barely take care of myself. Sometimes the despair makes me just want to lie in bed and never get up or swallow a bottle of pills so it will all be over. Living a lonely solitary life is killing me. I have a college degree in psychology and have worked my entire adult life trying to help adults, teenagers, and children to have better lives for themselves, and now I am stuck in the boat where many of them have been, where I feel like there's no hope. I had a lot of problems working also because I live in the southern US where not only racism is rampant (though I'm white), but they also treat people like me the same as they do blacks, and by that I mean people who are bisexual, or open-minded, or who people assume to be gay. I have been fired from jobs, harassed, threatened, passed over for jobs, etc., to the point that years ago I got sick of even trying to work in such a hostile environment when all I ever did was accept everyone and try to help anyone in need. I could never fathom why everybody hated me so much just from general assumptions that I "might" be gay, having never told anyone anything, though I have had relationships with men and women. People here are so anti-gay that it is downright dangerous to make yourself known. They will create vicious lies and rumors to try to destroy your life, will not hire you for jobs, will fire you, threaten and harass you. Further, ever since I was a young boy, I have also been physically abused because of this. White trash rednecks love to do this, and it has been done to me many times-they will kidnap you, drag you off into the woods, tie you to a tree or down in the back of a truck or string you up between two trees, or even act like they're going to hang you, and then they gang rape you, and then they threaten to kill you and your family if you ever tell on them. And you can't go to the police because they're usually there raping you too. I've had to call in the FBI on them several times, and the National Guard has even had to show its presence in our town before because these vigilante KKK rednecks are so threatening towards anybody who isn't a redneck. They think there's only 2 kinds of people, rednecks and queers. Or whites and blacks. I'm white but they label me a queer, and to them, that's just as bad as being black. So therefore, they beat me and rape me. My mother taught me at a young age to play dead, and I had to do it several times growing up. I also had to play like Brer Rabbit and tell them to please not leave me in the woods or I might die, but it's what I wanted because I was a boy scout and I knew I could survive if they'd just leave me alone and let me live. They even had a hand in killing my mother many years ago, and they also kill anyone who gets close to trying to expose them. You learn to stay away from them and to keep your mouth shut and maybe they'll let you live and find somebody else to rape and abuse. By the way, I'm in southern Alabama, in Washington County, and in surrounding counties it's the same. Besides wanting to be able to have a decent life, I want to get out of this area and be free for the first time in my life. Even while in college and working as an adult, I've encountered more redneck KKK vigilantes, both male and female, always hellbent on killing queers, as they say it. I want to be able to afford to move somewhere else, preferably to Florida or to California, to a place where nobody knows me and maybe I can hide out and start over, and also where people are more accepting of people who choose to not be a redneck. I am tired of being hated for being a perfectly normal human being. I know from college that we are all bisexual creatures and that there is nothing wrong with me. Hell, these rednecks are raping young boys, so they're the queers and child molesters, so why the hell would they be threatening me? The answer is because they want to be free to rape and molest whoever they want and they always get away with it, because this area is full of corrupt police and sheriffs and politicians and wealthy townfolk who can get away with murder repeatedly. I just want out, so please help me to be able to move to a safer environment so that I might live a decent and normal life one day, and so I might also can bring myself out of depression and learn to walk in the sun again and hopefully also find love like I want and not be afraid to feel and express my emotions. I cannot believe that in 2012 they have such control over everyone in the redneck south to the point that people are afraid to live normal lives. And yes, every single word of this is true, so please help. At the rate I'm going, I'll never be able to afford to move elsewhere and to get away from this hellhole called southern Alabama. Even in the last several years, I was near our local river at the boat landing parking lot talking to a friend when the police showed up and started to harass us and called us queers for being two men talking in a parking lot. He then made us stay there and called two friends of his to come there, and while the policeman held a gun on us, they raped me and made me give the two redneck men blow jobs and kept slamming the truck door on my head and punching and kicking me. I did successfully get that policeman moved to another town after I went to the hospital after I was raped, but he wasn't fired. The other two men were never tried for their crimes, but someone did end up murdering one of them. This place is awful, you just have no idea. Another incident I'll tell you about before I end this is one weekend I was working a new part time job on top of my full time job at a maximum security mental hospital. My boss at work, a nurse, had a brother who owned a lake, and he needed someone to take care of general maintenance and help out guests and such. Well to try to me out, they had me stay there one weekend, in my own cabin, with just one guest on the lake, and he was in a cabin down the hill. Well, I found out during the course of this weekend that the nurse and her brother were in the KKK and this man staying at the lake had paid them to be able to hunt him a real life queer at the lake. So he kept harassing me and threatening me and coming to my cabin at night with his guns and even one time chased me down the pier and I had to jump into the lake fully clothed, wallet, shoes, jeans, and all, swimming as deep as I could and moving side to side and spinning underwater because this psycho man was shooting bullets at me! I felt like I was in a movie, and I thankfully didn't get hit but several bullets whizzed by me underwater, and I held my breath and swam clear across the lake underwater and only came up when I had to because I had no breath left, and I had to spend the entire night hiding among the lilypads with my head barely sticking out of the water, for fear that he might see me, even though I was across the lake and there wasn't enough moonlight for him to see me from that far away. I was freezing and sick by the next morning, not to mention having a nervous breakdown after being hunted. My brother and his fiance' got me a lawyer and we were advised by him not to pursue it or they would murder us all. The nurse even admitted to the setup at work the next week, and was surprised that I had shown back up, because she figured I'd have been bagged by the hunter.

I have been on disability for several years now, primarily for bipolar disorder, but also from back and neck injuries sustained from being hit by a drunk driver on new year's eve several years ago. I barely make enough to cover my bills and to buy food to eat, and there is never anything left over, and often there isn't enough, leaving me having to beg for money from friends or family members, who often don't have it and can't give anything. I have been stuck at home for years because I cannot even afford gas to go out in town unless I have to go to the doctor, grocery store, drug store, etc. I do not even want to think about trying to meet a person for a relationship because I feel like I have nothing to offer someone when I can barely take care of myself. Sometimes the despair makes me just want to lie in bed and never get up or swallow a bottle of pills so it will all be over. Living a lonely solitary life is killing me. I have a college degree in psychology and have worked my entire adult life trying to help adults, teenagers, and children to have better lives for themselves, and now I am stuck in the boat where many of them have been, where I feel like there's no hope. I had a lot of problems working also because I live in the southern US where not only racism is rampant (though I'm white), but they also treat people like me the same as they do blacks, and by that I mean people who are bisexual, or open-minded, or who people assume to be gay. I have been fired from jobs, harassed, threatened, passed over for jobs, etc., to the point that years ago I got sick of even trying to work in such a hostile environment when all I ever did was accept everyone and try to help anyone in need. I could never fathom why everybody hated me so much just from general assumptions that I "might" be gay, having never told anyone anything, though I have had relationships with men and women. People here are so anti-gay that it is downright dangerous to make yourself known. They will create vicious lies and rumors to try to destroy your life, will not hire you for jobs, will fire you, threaten and harass you. Further, ever since I was a young boy, I have also been physically abused because of this. White trash rednecks love to do this, and it has been done to me many times-they will kidnap you, drag you off into the woods, tie you to a tree or down in the back of a truck or string you up between two trees, or even act like they're going to hang you, and then they gang rape you, and then they threaten to kill you and your family if you ever tell on them. And you can't go to the police because they're usually there raping you too. I've had to call in the FBI on them several times, and the National Guard has even had to show its presence in our town before because these vigilante KKK rednecks are so threatening towards anybody who isn't a redneck. They think there's only 2 kinds of people, rednecks and queers. Or whites and blacks. I'm white but they label me a queer, and to them, that's just as bad as being black. So therefore, they beat me and rape me. My mother taught me at a young age to play dead, and I had to do it several times growing up. I also had to play like Brer Rabbit and tell them to please not leave me in the woods or I might die, but it's what I wanted because I was a boy scout and I knew I could survive if they'd just leave me alone and let me live. They even had a hand in killing my mother many years ago, and they also kill anyone who gets close to trying to expose them. You learn to stay away from them and to keep your mouth shut and maybe they'll let you live and find somebody else to rape and abuse. By the way, I'm in southern Alabama, in Washington County, and in surrounding counties it's the same. Besides wanting to be able to have a decent life, I want to get out of this area and be free for the first time in my life. Even while in college and working as an adult, I've encountered more redneck KKK vigilantes, both male and female, always hellbent on killing queers, as they say it. I want to be able to afford to move somewhere else, preferably to Florida or to California, to a place where nobody knows me and maybe I can hide out and start over, and also where people are more accepting of people who choose to not be a redneck. I am tired of being hated for being a perfectly normal human being. I know from college that we are all bisexual creatures and that there is nothing wrong with me. Hell, these rednecks are raping young boys, so they're the queers and child molesters, so why the hell would they be threatening me? The answer is because they want to be free to rape and molest whoever they want and they always get away with it, because this area is full of corrupt police and sheriffs and politicians and wealthy townfolk who can get away with murder repeatedly. I just want out, so please help me to be able to move to a safer environment so that I might live a decent and normal life one day, and so I might also can bring myself out of depression and learn to walk in the sun again and hopefully also find love like I want and not be afraid to feel and express my emotions. I cannot believe that in 2012 they have such control over everyone in the redneck south to the point that people are afraid to live normal lives. And yes, every single word of this is true, so please help. At the rate I'm going, I'll never be able to afford to move elsewhere and to get away from this hellhole called southern Alabama. Even in the last several years, I was near our local river at the boat landing parking lot talking to a friend when the police showed up and started to harass us and called us queers for being two men talking in a parking lot. He then made us stay there and called two friends of his to come there, and while the policeman held a gun on us, they raped me and made me give the two redneck men blow jobs and kept slamming the truck door on my head and punching and kicking me. I did successfully get that policeman moved to another town after I went to the hospital after I was raped, but he wasn't fired. The other two men were never tried for their crimes, but someone did end up murdering one of them. This place is awful, you just have no idea. Another incident I'll tell you about before I end this is one weekend I was working a new part time job on top of my full time job at a maximum security mental hospital. My boss at work, a nurse, had a brother who owned a lake, and he needed someone to take care of general maintenance and help out guests and such. Well to try to me out, they had me stay there one weekend, in my own cabin, with just one guest on the lake, and he was in a cabin down the hill. Well, I found out during the course of this weekend that the nurse and her brother were in the KKK and this man staying at the lake had paid them to be able to hunt him a real life queer at the lake. So he kept harassing me and threatening me and coming to my cabin at night with his guns and even one time chased me down the pier and I had to jump into the lake fully clothed, wallet, shoes, jeans, and all, swimming as deep as I could and moving side to side and spinning underwater because this psycho man was shooting bullets at me! I felt like I was in a movie, and I thankfully didn't get hit but several bullets whizzed by me underwater, and I held my breath and swam clear across the lake underwater and only came up when I had to because I had no breath left, and I had to spend the entire night hiding among the lilypads with my head barely sticking out of the water, for fear that he might see me, even though I was across the lake and there wasn't enough moonlight for him to see me from that far away. I was freezing and sick by the next morning, not to mention having a nervous breakdown after being hunted. My brother and his fiance' got me a lawyer and we were advised by him not to pursue it or they would murder us all. The nurse even admitted to the setup at work the next week, and was surprised that I had shown back up, because she figured I'd have been bagged by the hunter.