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Help me keep my special needs children safe from their abusive father

Posted by psychmomof3 on 2012-02-20 18:58:32

I'm a 33 year old mother of three boys. I grew up in an abusive home and proceeded on to an abusive marriage that lasted 13 years. From that marriage I have 2 sons, ages 13 and 11. My 13 year old was diagnosed with Asperger's syndrome at age 9; my 11 year old has conduct disorder and has a tentative diagnosis of bipolar disorder. About 4 years ago, I finally had the courage to walk out of my abusive marriage and try to build a safe and normal life for my sons. Fast forward a year, and I found the love of my life and soulmate and remarried.I moved 5 hours away from my ex husband, thinking we would be safer. My ex husband remarried as well. Unfortunately, he married an attorney. Over the course of the last 3 years, we have been kept in court with custody battles and such, while my ex used his new wife's knowledge of the law to find every possible way to avoid paying child support. WE had to pay for an attorney, while his wife represented him for free. Not to mention, the court where we had to go for these cases was less than a mile from his home, while we had to travel 5 hours each way. My current husband and I have a son together now who is almost 2 years old. For 6 months of the last year my ex had finally been paying child support. My husband works to provide for us, while also having to support his son from a previous marriage. That's supporting 6 people on one income! So, having the child support really helped. (I am currently unemployed as we have no means of transportation and live in a rural area with no public transportation, and also have 2 children who are too old for daycare, yet cannot be left unattended due to their disorders.) We werent wealthy by any means, but we managed to make it from week to week and keep our bills paid. However, in October, my husband's employer went out of business with no notice. In the same week, my ex ceased making child support payments and the transmission went out in our vehicle. My husband, out of desperation, found a friend two towns away who would allow him to stay with him so my husband would be in an area with public transportation so he could look for work ( the friend has a one bedroom home that would not house us all, so the kids and I stayed here). All he has managed to find so far is a part time fast food job that barely covers his child support payments. This morning I was delivered the court eviction papers that will render my children and I homeless. If this happens, I have no doubt that my abusive ex will do everything he can to take my children away from me. At this point, I do not even have a way to get to the grocery store, let alone to another state to fight for custody of my children, and I certainly cannot afford legal representation. Our current situation is this: my husband and I must live in two different towns because of lack of transportation and income; I am stranded in the middle of nowhere with two special needs children and a toddler; we are on the verge of eviction with no place to go (neither my husband nor I have any family who can help); all of our utilities will be turned off within a week (no water or heat, we already do not have a phone); and my vindictive, abusive ex husband who does not even bother to financially support his children could potentially regain custody if we find ourselves homeless. I am living in a nightmare right now, and am at the end of my rope! I have no other place to turn and I am really praying that this option can help me find a light at the end of this long, dark tunnel. My h usband and I are both abuse survivors who have children with special needs. We are currently full time college students, studying psychology and social work (3.88 GPA's for both of us) because we have been through just about everything imaginable and want to use our past negative experiences to help others who are suffering or surviving and trying to cope. Our only goals in life are to give our children a decent life and help others who need it when we are able. All we need is a little help getting to the point where we are able.

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