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Escape
Posted by mbailey5 on 2012-03-11 17:58:03
Hello, the fact that I am writing this is making me realise that this has been the worst day of my life.
For the past two years I have been in love. A whirlwind romance which gave me a release from my miserable abusive upbringing. I moved in with this beautiful, kind, intelligent girl who I had fallen for. My parents did not approve and they saw her loosen their iron grip on me, she gave me the confidence that I never had to stand up to them.
I had to decide between my parents who had habitually beaten me, put me down, turned me into a shell of a person. or the only person that ever has and probably ever will love me. I chose her, and I haven't seen or heard from my parents since, part of my believes it was a perfect excuse for them to rid me of the son who had only ever disappointed them.
I was in dreamland, I was invited into her home and from day one it felt more like home than the cold loveless one I was brought up in. Everything was great for a few months and then she left a highly flirtatious conversation up on facebook with a man in which she was bragging at how many other men she had slept with in the past year. My life turned on its head. I gave her another chance after weeks of pain, tears and excuses. She convinced me everything was going to change. Three months on to that day I hear through a friend that she with another man in a nightclub the other day.
I am lost, I am trapped. I have no money. My parents do not care about me and the one person that I have ever loved has betrayed me multiple times.
I feel humiliated, i feel physically sick, I am mentally and physically exhausted. I have nowhere to go, i need to escape. If I leave her then I am homeless if I stay with her then I am bound to being abused again, this time not physically as with my parents but mentally. My heart cannot take this torment anymore.
My mouse is hovering above booking a flight to Amsterdam tomorrow. I have chosen there because of the large UK community. I want a new environemnt, i need to meet people for the first time in my life. I want to live and work somewhere else but I just do not have the funds to do it. I have been reliant on people all my life and I just need a chance to completely start fresh and I cannot do this round here or in this country. I need to travel, i need to experience things which I have never experienced. I do not deserve any charity but I am desperate, so very desperate. I am literally begging for any help.
Thank you so much for reading
For the past two years I have been in love. A whirlwind romance which gave me a release from my miserable abusive upbringing. I moved in with this beautiful, kind, intelligent girl who I had fallen for. My parents did not approve and they saw her loosen their iron grip on me, she gave me the confidence that I never had to stand up to them.
I had to decide between my parents who had habitually beaten me, put me down, turned me into a shell of a person. or the only person that ever has and probably ever will love me. I chose her, and I haven't seen or heard from my parents since, part of my believes it was a perfect excuse for them to rid me of the son who had only ever disappointed them.
I was in dreamland, I was invited into her home and from day one it felt more like home than the cold loveless one I was brought up in. Everything was great for a few months and then she left a highly flirtatious conversation up on facebook with a man in which she was bragging at how many other men she had slept with in the past year. My life turned on its head. I gave her another chance after weeks of pain, tears and excuses. She convinced me everything was going to change. Three months on to that day I hear through a friend that she with another man in a nightclub the other day.
I am lost, I am trapped. I have no money. My parents do not care about me and the one person that I have ever loved has betrayed me multiple times.
I feel humiliated, i feel physically sick, I am mentally and physically exhausted. I have nowhere to go, i need to escape. If I leave her then I am homeless if I stay with her then I am bound to being abused again, this time not physically as with my parents but mentally. My heart cannot take this torment anymore.
My mouse is hovering above booking a flight to Amsterdam tomorrow. I have chosen there because of the large UK community. I want a new environemnt, i need to meet people for the first time in my life. I want to live and work somewhere else but I just do not have the funds to do it. I have been reliant on people all my life and I just need a chance to completely start fresh and I cannot do this round here or in this country. I need to travel, i need to experience things which I have never experienced. I do not deserve any charity but I am desperate, so very desperate. I am literally begging for any help.
Thank you so much for reading
Disabled over 3 years seeking help with housing and transportation
Posted by CyberNeedy on 2011-12-27 01:58:03
Thank you for even reading this because if you have then you are seeking to help people in need and you must have a wonderful heart. I have in recent years reached out to orphaned children in both Uganda and Mexico who needed me so I have no problems with asking for some help myself at this time.
After 3 years of back and forth with Social Security, I finally was approved for federal disability. Thankfully, I can move forward with testing and treatments to figure out what is causing the multiple symptoms disabling me. My sole desire is to get well enough to return to work in at least some capacity. Now I have some savings from back disability owed but not quite enough to finally purchase my own home. I am looking to purchase a modest home that is manageable for me in my condition. One that is safe and secure for me and my toy poodle who deserves something nice. Although I have enough for a decent down payment, my credit has suffered due to my inability to work. My medical bills went straight to my credit report as being unpaid while I waited for SSDI approval and Medicare approval. My credit score is below 600 and I cannot get a loan. I have $20,000 I can put toward my very first home ever. My goal is to get my $20,000 matched in order for me to purchase a small home/condo for approximately $40,000. My income is $955/mo and I still need to find suitable transportation also. My last vehicle was basically stolen by a predatory towing service and I was incapacitated at the time due to my disability and later was unable to afford retrieving the vehicle because of outrageous storage fees. Currently family members are taking me everywhere which can sometimes be more difficult than helpful. I A modest reliable vehicle is what I need. My individual goal is to become self sufficient and self reliant once again...get healthy and go back to work. Any help with the above items would be much appreciated. If I were in a better position I believe I too would be searching to help those in similar situations as mine.
After 3 years of back and forth with Social Security, I finally was approved for federal disability. Thankfully, I can move forward with testing and treatments to figure out what is causing the multiple symptoms disabling me. My sole desire is to get well enough to return to work in at least some capacity. Now I have some savings from back disability owed but not quite enough to finally purchase my own home. I am looking to purchase a modest home that is manageable for me in my condition. One that is safe and secure for me and my toy poodle who deserves something nice. Although I have enough for a decent down payment, my credit has suffered due to my inability to work. My medical bills went straight to my credit report as being unpaid while I waited for SSDI approval and Medicare approval. My credit score is below 600 and I cannot get a loan. I have $20,000 I can put toward my very first home ever. My goal is to get my $20,000 matched in order for me to purchase a small home/condo for approximately $40,000. My income is $955/mo and I still need to find suitable transportation also. My last vehicle was basically stolen by a predatory towing service and I was incapacitated at the time due to my disability and later was unable to afford retrieving the vehicle because of outrageous storage fees. Currently family members are taking me everywhere which can sometimes be more difficult than helpful. I A modest reliable vehicle is what I need. My individual goal is to become self sufficient and self reliant once again...get healthy and go back to work. Any help with the above items would be much appreciated. If I were in a better position I believe I too would be searching to help those in similar situations as mine.
Please Help Me!
Posted by lindabaker on 2011-04-04 17:58:35
NW-COLUMBUS, OH
I am a 27 year old woman who has been hopelessly stuck in an unbearably abusive relationship for 6 years now.
I was only 21 when I met my husband. I was a college student struggling to make ends meet on my own. Ive never had much in the way of familial support, my mother is an abusive alcoholic and my father left when I was 8. Therefore I held a full time job the entire time I was in school. It was a big accomplishment for me, but it was rough.
When my husband came along he seemed like the perfect guy. He was wonderful, funny, sweet, generous, smart, kind, he was easy to fall in love with. After only a few months we moved in together and he proposed on our one year anniversary. I put school on hold and quit my job to help him get his business off the ground, thinking, at the time since his earning potential was so much higher than mine, that it just made sense for us as a couple and a team.
It didn't take long though for him to change. He quickly became distant, depressed, violent and moody for no apparent reason. He began drinking in excess and popping pills frequently, lashing out at me over nothing, lying, hiding things and cheating. My happily ever after was now a living hell! Every time Id get fed up enough to leave he'd cry, apologize very sincerely and beg me to stay, promising he would change and admitting how wrong it was for him to treat me that way. When that stopped working he started trying to bully and control me, threatening me, emotionally manipulating me and being physically aggressive & abusive with me. My husband is 7 years my elder so at first I suppose I was naive and easy to manipulate...Because I believed him and loved him I stayed.
But by year three I had, had it with the abuse and no longer believed him when he promised to change, I now knew better. Unfortunately I didnt have a parent or family member I could go to for help. Therefore my options were to either be homeless or to stay with him until I was financially able to be on my own. So I decided to make a plan to leave him. I had worked on and off in the Real Estate industry since my college years and so I went out and got an entry level job in that field and opened up my own bank account so that I could put money aside to pay off my large amount of debts (over $45,000 in student loans, car, credit card, etc) and move out on my own.
It was hard putting money aside without him noticing, I could only use commission and bonus checks that he didnt know about to put in savings. After a year I had only managed to save just over $6000, which barely made a dent in my student loan debts, much less allowing me to pay off the others.
So I began searching for a better job. After about a dozen interviews I finally landed an assistant manager position in a leasing office at a property owned by the city that paid better and was more in line with my capabilities. The position required me to work in a very dangerous part of town. I was dealing with drug dealers, murders, and other various felons on a daily basis, having my life threatened and irate residents screaming in my face wasnt an abnormal occurrence! But I was so determined to get away from my husband that I stuck it out. In just under a year I was promoted to Property Manager after the previous one had quit. I was elated! Finally I would be making enough to get my own place. I worked from 9am to 9pm most days since we were understaffed. I never went home until everything was taken care of. I gave 200%, going above and beyond to make my property the best it could be. I often received compliments from my superiors and the owner of the company on my job performance as well.
However before I was able to move out, things took a terrible turn. About four months into my new position, the company had hired a new person to be my superior. Unfortunately for me this person, now being in a new position of power, decided that they wanted to give all their friends from their previous company jobs. Since there were no openings available they decided to terminate current employees in order to make positions for their friends. I was one of those people! I remember the day so vividly in my head, being told they were letting me go. I just kept asking why? Id never once done anything wrong, I got complimented on my work performance frequently and even the residents who used to hate me, now loved me! My new boss and the companys owner agreed, Id done nothing wrong and offered me severance pay. But I didnt need severance pay, I needed a job! I was devastated. I had come SO close I could taste it, just to have it all ripped away like a cruel joke of fate. I nearly had a nervous breakdown. The thought of having to start over again with a new company from square one, the thought of staying with my husband another day was unbearable. I couldnt understand why this was happening to me, Id worked SO hard and after more than 2 years, gotten no closer to getting away from him.
I tried to find a replacement job with equal pay right away with no luck. By now the economy was very bad and good job offers were few and far between. Employers could afford to be picky, and people with three times my experience were applying for the same jobs. I decided to meet with an employment lawyer to see what options I had about my situation with my previous employer. He agreed my termination was wrongful and thought I had a solid case, to at the very least, get a larger severance. But he also informed me that while I had been wrongfully terminated, in the state of Ohio, employment is at will and therefore employers are allowed to fire you for no reason, as long as they dont discriminate against you! He preceeded with legal action confident that they would agree to work something more reasonalbe out, but things did not go as hoped.
So here I am. Six years into an abusive relationship that Ive been trying to escape for three! Ive now been unemployed for 8 months. Aside from the bad economy, the fact that I have taken legal against an employer and no reference from that employer due to filing a complaint against them, has made me practically un-hirable in my field. Ive tried interviewing for other jobs, but I either dont have the experience or they dont pay even half of what Id need to take care of myself. Ive thought about going back to school, but, again money becomes an issue. Ive done the math and I simply cant afford it. Ive spoken with divorce lawyers and since I have no children and have worked during my marriage, a divorce wont render anything in the way of financial support.
Ive exhausted every option I can think of and need help desperately!!! At this point my life is like walking a tight rope, trying not to do anything or say anything to set him off. Even so, his volitle moods and angry outburst are a daily occurrence. Im terrified and feel very hopeless. Ive had to spend almost everything I was able to save while employed, since being unemployed and am now down to almost nothing. I cant get welfare or go to an abused womens shelter because I have no children. I have nowhere to go and no one who can help me. I dont want to be homeless, but I am afraid if I stay Im going to end up dead.
Ive never in my life asked anyone for a handout. Ive always had to be very independent and self reliant. Im a good person, and am the first to help others when they need it. I am smart, loyal, talented, trustworthy, compassionate and moral. And I dont deserve to be in this situation. Ive never been one to complain about my problems. I always thought, where theres a will, theres a way, and that if I worked hard enough I would get where I wanted to be. But Ive fought tooth and nail trying to get out of this hell Ive been trapped in for years now to no avail.
If anyone out there is in a position to help me, I would be eternally grateful. Unlike most other people, going home to live with mom & dad until I get back on feet just isnt an option for me. I NEED MONEY and I need it NOW. I either need a steady, stable job paying at least $60000 annually or enough money to support myself while I finish my college degree. My current debts (student loans, car, credit card & medical bills) total just under $40000!!! I pay $1800 cumulatively toward these debts alone per month. Add in a VERY modest budget of $2500 for the cost of living (rent, utilities, phone, food, gas, toiletries and other necessities like car maintenance, insurance, dog care expenses, etc) and I absolutely cannot live on less than $60000 annually, and even that will be very tight, considering how much taxes get taken out.
Ideally I would love to work with animals, and given the time and money I would love to go into Veterinary Medicine one day. Im also very interested in holistic health, both for animals and people, specifically, holistic nutrition, herbal medicine and holistic treatment of illness, afflictions and diseases. I dont have any job experience in these fields, but I am very knowledgeable in them through my own experiences and research. And I have a love of animals that would be hard to surpass. Im a very eager and fast learner. I have tons of experience doing just about everything office related; Im good with computers and different types of software and have experience managing a small staff. I have great leadership skills, am very organized and give much attention to details. I am a night person by nature, so early morning jobs can be difficult for me if there is a hard start time. I work best in less rigid environments, with more flexible hours. Please dont get the wrong impression however! I am a very diligent and reliable worker, and will always do my job efficiently. I have so much to offer and could be doing so much more with my life if given the chance.
Any job opportunities or cash donations would be greatly appreciated! Please help me to finally break free of this misery Ive been living in. I could never thank you enough!
Sincerely,
Linda
I am a 27 year old woman who has been hopelessly stuck in an unbearably abusive relationship for 6 years now.
I was only 21 when I met my husband. I was a college student struggling to make ends meet on my own. Ive never had much in the way of familial support, my mother is an abusive alcoholic and my father left when I was 8. Therefore I held a full time job the entire time I was in school. It was a big accomplishment for me, but it was rough.
When my husband came along he seemed like the perfect guy. He was wonderful, funny, sweet, generous, smart, kind, he was easy to fall in love with. After only a few months we moved in together and he proposed on our one year anniversary. I put school on hold and quit my job to help him get his business off the ground, thinking, at the time since his earning potential was so much higher than mine, that it just made sense for us as a couple and a team.
It didn't take long though for him to change. He quickly became distant, depressed, violent and moody for no apparent reason. He began drinking in excess and popping pills frequently, lashing out at me over nothing, lying, hiding things and cheating. My happily ever after was now a living hell! Every time Id get fed up enough to leave he'd cry, apologize very sincerely and beg me to stay, promising he would change and admitting how wrong it was for him to treat me that way. When that stopped working he started trying to bully and control me, threatening me, emotionally manipulating me and being physically aggressive & abusive with me. My husband is 7 years my elder so at first I suppose I was naive and easy to manipulate...Because I believed him and loved him I stayed.
But by year three I had, had it with the abuse and no longer believed him when he promised to change, I now knew better. Unfortunately I didnt have a parent or family member I could go to for help. Therefore my options were to either be homeless or to stay with him until I was financially able to be on my own. So I decided to make a plan to leave him. I had worked on and off in the Real Estate industry since my college years and so I went out and got an entry level job in that field and opened up my own bank account so that I could put money aside to pay off my large amount of debts (over $45,000 in student loans, car, credit card, etc) and move out on my own.
It was hard putting money aside without him noticing, I could only use commission and bonus checks that he didnt know about to put in savings. After a year I had only managed to save just over $6000, which barely made a dent in my student loan debts, much less allowing me to pay off the others.
So I began searching for a better job. After about a dozen interviews I finally landed an assistant manager position in a leasing office at a property owned by the city that paid better and was more in line with my capabilities. The position required me to work in a very dangerous part of town. I was dealing with drug dealers, murders, and other various felons on a daily basis, having my life threatened and irate residents screaming in my face wasnt an abnormal occurrence! But I was so determined to get away from my husband that I stuck it out. In just under a year I was promoted to Property Manager after the previous one had quit. I was elated! Finally I would be making enough to get my own place. I worked from 9am to 9pm most days since we were understaffed. I never went home until everything was taken care of. I gave 200%, going above and beyond to make my property the best it could be. I often received compliments from my superiors and the owner of the company on my job performance as well.
However before I was able to move out, things took a terrible turn. About four months into my new position, the company had hired a new person to be my superior. Unfortunately for me this person, now being in a new position of power, decided that they wanted to give all their friends from their previous company jobs. Since there were no openings available they decided to terminate current employees in order to make positions for their friends. I was one of those people! I remember the day so vividly in my head, being told they were letting me go. I just kept asking why? Id never once done anything wrong, I got complimented on my work performance frequently and even the residents who used to hate me, now loved me! My new boss and the companys owner agreed, Id done nothing wrong and offered me severance pay. But I didnt need severance pay, I needed a job! I was devastated. I had come SO close I could taste it, just to have it all ripped away like a cruel joke of fate. I nearly had a nervous breakdown. The thought of having to start over again with a new company from square one, the thought of staying with my husband another day was unbearable. I couldnt understand why this was happening to me, Id worked SO hard and after more than 2 years, gotten no closer to getting away from him.
I tried to find a replacement job with equal pay right away with no luck. By now the economy was very bad and good job offers were few and far between. Employers could afford to be picky, and people with three times my experience were applying for the same jobs. I decided to meet with an employment lawyer to see what options I had about my situation with my previous employer. He agreed my termination was wrongful and thought I had a solid case, to at the very least, get a larger severance. But he also informed me that while I had been wrongfully terminated, in the state of Ohio, employment is at will and therefore employers are allowed to fire you for no reason, as long as they dont discriminate against you! He preceeded with legal action confident that they would agree to work something more reasonalbe out, but things did not go as hoped.
So here I am. Six years into an abusive relationship that Ive been trying to escape for three! Ive now been unemployed for 8 months. Aside from the bad economy, the fact that I have taken legal against an employer and no reference from that employer due to filing a complaint against them, has made me practically un-hirable in my field. Ive tried interviewing for other jobs, but I either dont have the experience or they dont pay even half of what Id need to take care of myself. Ive thought about going back to school, but, again money becomes an issue. Ive done the math and I simply cant afford it. Ive spoken with divorce lawyers and since I have no children and have worked during my marriage, a divorce wont render anything in the way of financial support.
Ive exhausted every option I can think of and need help desperately!!! At this point my life is like walking a tight rope, trying not to do anything or say anything to set him off. Even so, his volitle moods and angry outburst are a daily occurrence. Im terrified and feel very hopeless. Ive had to spend almost everything I was able to save while employed, since being unemployed and am now down to almost nothing. I cant get welfare or go to an abused womens shelter because I have no children. I have nowhere to go and no one who can help me. I dont want to be homeless, but I am afraid if I stay Im going to end up dead.
Ive never in my life asked anyone for a handout. Ive always had to be very independent and self reliant. Im a good person, and am the first to help others when they need it. I am smart, loyal, talented, trustworthy, compassionate and moral. And I dont deserve to be in this situation. Ive never been one to complain about my problems. I always thought, where theres a will, theres a way, and that if I worked hard enough I would get where I wanted to be. But Ive fought tooth and nail trying to get out of this hell Ive been trapped in for years now to no avail.
If anyone out there is in a position to help me, I would be eternally grateful. Unlike most other people, going home to live with mom & dad until I get back on feet just isnt an option for me. I NEED MONEY and I need it NOW. I either need a steady, stable job paying at least $60000 annually or enough money to support myself while I finish my college degree. My current debts (student loans, car, credit card & medical bills) total just under $40000!!! I pay $1800 cumulatively toward these debts alone per month. Add in a VERY modest budget of $2500 for the cost of living (rent, utilities, phone, food, gas, toiletries and other necessities like car maintenance, insurance, dog care expenses, etc) and I absolutely cannot live on less than $60000 annually, and even that will be very tight, considering how much taxes get taken out.
Ideally I would love to work with animals, and given the time and money I would love to go into Veterinary Medicine one day. Im also very interested in holistic health, both for animals and people, specifically, holistic nutrition, herbal medicine and holistic treatment of illness, afflictions and diseases. I dont have any job experience in these fields, but I am very knowledgeable in them through my own experiences and research. And I have a love of animals that would be hard to surpass. Im a very eager and fast learner. I have tons of experience doing just about everything office related; Im good with computers and different types of software and have experience managing a small staff. I have great leadership skills, am very organized and give much attention to details. I am a night person by nature, so early morning jobs can be difficult for me if there is a hard start time. I work best in less rigid environments, with more flexible hours. Please dont get the wrong impression however! I am a very diligent and reliable worker, and will always do my job efficiently. I have so much to offer and could be doing so much more with my life if given the chance.
Any job opportunities or cash donations would be greatly appreciated! Please help me to finally break free of this misery Ive been living in. I could never thank you enough!
Sincerely,
Linda
Desperate to Escape Abusive Husband!
Posted by jamie-needshelp on 2011-03-19 22:58:19
NW-COLUMBUS, OH
I am a 27 year old woman who has been hopelessly stuck in an unbearably abusive relationship for 6 years now.
I was only 21 when I met my husband. I was a college student struggling to make ends meet on my own. Ive never had much in the way of familial support, my mother is an abusive alcoholic and my father left when I was 8. Therefore I held a full time job the entire time I was in school. It was a big accomplishment for me, but it was rough.
When my husband came along he seemed like the perfect guy. He was wonderful, funny, sweet, generous, smart, kind, he was easy to fall in love with. After only a few months we moved in together and he proposed on our one year anniversary. I put school on hold and quit my job to help him get his business off the ground, thinking, at the time since his earning potential was so much higher than mine, that it just made sense for us as a couple and a team.
It didn't take long though for him to change. He quickly became distant, depressed, violent and moody for no apparent reason. He began drinking in excess and popping pills frequently, lashing out at me over nothing, lying, hiding things and cheating. My happily ever after was now a living hell! Every time Id get fed up enough to leave he'd cry, apologize very sincerely and beg me to stay, promising he would change and admitting how wrong it was for him to treat me that way. When that stopped working he started trying to bully and control me, threatening me, emotionally manipulating me and being physically aggressive & abusive with me. My husband is 7 years my elder so at first I suppose I was naive and easy to manipulate...Because I believed him and loved him I stayed.
But by year three I had, had it with the abuse and no longer believed him when he promised to change, I now knew better. Unfortunately I didnt have a parent or family member I could go to for help. Therefore my options were to either be homeless or to stay with him until I was financially able to be on my own. So I decided to make a plan to leave him. I had worked on and off in the Real Estate industry since my college years and so I went out and got an entry level job in that field and opened up my own bank account so that I could put money aside to pay off my large amount of debts (over $45,000 in student loans, car, credit card, etc) and move out on my own.
It was hard putting money aside without him noticing, I could only use commission and bonus checks that he didnt know about to put in savings. After a year I had only managed to save just over $6000, which barely made a dent in my student loan debts, much less allowing me to pay off the others.
So I began searching for a better job. After about a dozen interviews I finally landed an assistant manager position in a leasing office at a property owned by the city that paid better and was more in line with my capabilities. The position required me to work in a very dangerous part of town. I was dealing with drug dealers, murders, and other various felons on a daily basis, having my life threatened and irate residents screaming in my face wasnt an abnormal occurrence! But I was so determined to get away from my husband that I stuck it out. In just under a year I was promoted to Property Manager after the previous one had quit. I was elated! Finally I would be making enough to get my own place. I worked from 9am to 9pm most days since we were understaffed. I never went home until everything was taken care of. I gave 200%, going above and beyond to make my property the best it could be. I often received compliments from my superiors and the owner of the company on my job performance as well.
However before I was able to move out, things took a terrible turn. About four months into my new position, the company had hired a new person to be my superior. Unfortunately for me this person, now being in a new position of power, decided that they wanted to give all their friends from their previous company jobs. Since there were no openings available they decided to terminate current employees in order to make positions for their friends. I was one of those people! I remember the day so vividly in my head, being told they were letting me go. I just kept asking why? Id never once done anything wrong, I got complimented on my work performance frequently and even the residents who used to hate me, now loved me! My new boss and the companys owner agreed, Id done nothing wrong and offered me severance pay. But I didnt need severance pay, I needed a job! I was devastated. I had come SO close I could taste it, just to have it all ripped away like a cruel joke of fate. I nearly had a nervous breakdown. The thought of having to start over again with a new company from square one, the thought of staying with my husband another day was unbearable. I couldnt understand why this was happening to me, Id worked SO hard and after more than 2 years, gotten no closer to getting away from him.
I tried to find a replacement job with equal pay right away with no luck. By now the economy was very bad and good job offers were few and far between. Employers could afford to be picky, and people with three times my experience were applying for the same jobs. I decided to meet with an employment lawyer to see what options I had about my situation with my previous employer. He agreed my termination was wrongful and thought I had a solid case, to at the very least, get a larger severance. But he also informed me that while I had been wrongfully terminated, in the state of Ohio, employment is at will and therefore employers are allowed to fire you for no reason, as long as they dont discriminate against you! He preceeded with legal action confident that they would agree to work something more reasonalbe out, but things did not go as hoped.
So here I am. Six years into an abusive relationship that Ive been trying to escape for three! Ive now been unemployed for 8 months. Aside from the bad economy, the fact that I have taken legal against an employer and no reference from that employer due to filing a complaint against them, has made me practically un-hirable in my field. Ive tried interviewing for other jobs, but I either dont have the experience or they dont pay even half of what Id need to take care of myself. Ive thought about going back to school, but, again money becomes an issue. Ive done the math and I simply cant afford it. Ive spoken with divorce lawyers and since I have no children and have worked during my marriage, a divorce wont render anything in the way of financial support.
Ive exhausted every option I can think of and need help desperately!!! At this point my life is like walking a tight rope, trying not to do anything or say anything to set him off. Even so, his volitle moods and angry outburst are a daily occurrence. Im terrified and feel very hopeless. Ive had to spend almost everything I was able to save while employed, since being unemployed and am now down to almost nothing. I cant get welfare or go to an abused womens shelter because I have no children. I have nowhere to go and no one who can help me. I dont want to be homeless, but I am afraid if I stay Im going to end up dead.
Ive never in my life asked anyone for a handout. Ive always had to be very independent and self reliant. Im a good person, and am the first to help others when they need it. I am smart, loyal, talented, trustworthy, compassionate and moral. And I dont deserve to be in this situation. Ive never been one to complain about my problems. I always thought, where theres a will, theres a way, and that if I worked hard enough I would get where I wanted to be. But Ive fought tooth and nail trying to get out of this hell Ive been trapped in for years now to no avail.
If anyone out there is in a position to help me, I would be eternally grateful. Unlike most other people, going home to live with mom & dad until I get back on feet just isnt an option for me. I NEED MONEY and I need it NOW. I either need a steady, stable job paying at least $60000 annually or enough money to support myself while I finish my college degree. My current debts (student loans, car, credit card & medical bills) total just under $40000!!! I pay $1800 cumulatively toward these debts alone per month. Add in a VERY modest budget of $2500 for the cost of living (rent, utilities, phone, food, gas, toiletries and other necessities like car maintenance, insurance, dog care expenses, etc) and I absolutely cannot live on less than $60000 annually, and even that will be very tight, considering how much taxes get taken out.
Ideally I would love to work with animals, and given the time and money I would love to go into Veterinary Medicine one day. Im also very interested in holistic health, both for animals and people, specifically, holistic nutrition, herbal medicine and holistic treatment of illness, afflictions and diseases. I dont have any job experience in these fields, but I am very knowledgeable in them through my own experiences and research. And I have a love of animals that would be hard to surpass. Im a very eager and fast learner. I have tons of experience doing just about everything office related; Im good with computers and different types of software and have experience managing a small staff. I have great leadership skills, am very organized and give much attention to details. I am a night person by nature, so early morning jobs can be difficult for me if there is a hard start time. I work best in less rigid environments, with more flexible hours. Please dont get the wrong impression however! I am a very diligent and reliable worker, and will always do my job efficiently. I have so much to offer and could be doing so much more with my life if given the chance.
Any job opportunities or cash donations would be greatly appreciated! Please help me to finally break free of this misery Ive been living in. I could never thank you enough!
Sincerely,
Jamie
I am a 27 year old woman who has been hopelessly stuck in an unbearably abusive relationship for 6 years now.
I was only 21 when I met my husband. I was a college student struggling to make ends meet on my own. Ive never had much in the way of familial support, my mother is an abusive alcoholic and my father left when I was 8. Therefore I held a full time job the entire time I was in school. It was a big accomplishment for me, but it was rough.
When my husband came along he seemed like the perfect guy. He was wonderful, funny, sweet, generous, smart, kind, he was easy to fall in love with. After only a few months we moved in together and he proposed on our one year anniversary. I put school on hold and quit my job to help him get his business off the ground, thinking, at the time since his earning potential was so much higher than mine, that it just made sense for us as a couple and a team.
It didn't take long though for him to change. He quickly became distant, depressed, violent and moody for no apparent reason. He began drinking in excess and popping pills frequently, lashing out at me over nothing, lying, hiding things and cheating. My happily ever after was now a living hell! Every time Id get fed up enough to leave he'd cry, apologize very sincerely and beg me to stay, promising he would change and admitting how wrong it was for him to treat me that way. When that stopped working he started trying to bully and control me, threatening me, emotionally manipulating me and being physically aggressive & abusive with me. My husband is 7 years my elder so at first I suppose I was naive and easy to manipulate...Because I believed him and loved him I stayed.
But by year three I had, had it with the abuse and no longer believed him when he promised to change, I now knew better. Unfortunately I didnt have a parent or family member I could go to for help. Therefore my options were to either be homeless or to stay with him until I was financially able to be on my own. So I decided to make a plan to leave him. I had worked on and off in the Real Estate industry since my college years and so I went out and got an entry level job in that field and opened up my own bank account so that I could put money aside to pay off my large amount of debts (over $45,000 in student loans, car, credit card, etc) and move out on my own.
It was hard putting money aside without him noticing, I could only use commission and bonus checks that he didnt know about to put in savings. After a year I had only managed to save just over $6000, which barely made a dent in my student loan debts, much less allowing me to pay off the others.
So I began searching for a better job. After about a dozen interviews I finally landed an assistant manager position in a leasing office at a property owned by the city that paid better and was more in line with my capabilities. The position required me to work in a very dangerous part of town. I was dealing with drug dealers, murders, and other various felons on a daily basis, having my life threatened and irate residents screaming in my face wasnt an abnormal occurrence! But I was so determined to get away from my husband that I stuck it out. In just under a year I was promoted to Property Manager after the previous one had quit. I was elated! Finally I would be making enough to get my own place. I worked from 9am to 9pm most days since we were understaffed. I never went home until everything was taken care of. I gave 200%, going above and beyond to make my property the best it could be. I often received compliments from my superiors and the owner of the company on my job performance as well.
However before I was able to move out, things took a terrible turn. About four months into my new position, the company had hired a new person to be my superior. Unfortunately for me this person, now being in a new position of power, decided that they wanted to give all their friends from their previous company jobs. Since there were no openings available they decided to terminate current employees in order to make positions for their friends. I was one of those people! I remember the day so vividly in my head, being told they were letting me go. I just kept asking why? Id never once done anything wrong, I got complimented on my work performance frequently and even the residents who used to hate me, now loved me! My new boss and the companys owner agreed, Id done nothing wrong and offered me severance pay. But I didnt need severance pay, I needed a job! I was devastated. I had come SO close I could taste it, just to have it all ripped away like a cruel joke of fate. I nearly had a nervous breakdown. The thought of having to start over again with a new company from square one, the thought of staying with my husband another day was unbearable. I couldnt understand why this was happening to me, Id worked SO hard and after more than 2 years, gotten no closer to getting away from him.
I tried to find a replacement job with equal pay right away with no luck. By now the economy was very bad and good job offers were few and far between. Employers could afford to be picky, and people with three times my experience were applying for the same jobs. I decided to meet with an employment lawyer to see what options I had about my situation with my previous employer. He agreed my termination was wrongful and thought I had a solid case, to at the very least, get a larger severance. But he also informed me that while I had been wrongfully terminated, in the state of Ohio, employment is at will and therefore employers are allowed to fire you for no reason, as long as they dont discriminate against you! He preceeded with legal action confident that they would agree to work something more reasonalbe out, but things did not go as hoped.
So here I am. Six years into an abusive relationship that Ive been trying to escape for three! Ive now been unemployed for 8 months. Aside from the bad economy, the fact that I have taken legal against an employer and no reference from that employer due to filing a complaint against them, has made me practically un-hirable in my field. Ive tried interviewing for other jobs, but I either dont have the experience or they dont pay even half of what Id need to take care of myself. Ive thought about going back to school, but, again money becomes an issue. Ive done the math and I simply cant afford it. Ive spoken with divorce lawyers and since I have no children and have worked during my marriage, a divorce wont render anything in the way of financial support.
Ive exhausted every option I can think of and need help desperately!!! At this point my life is like walking a tight rope, trying not to do anything or say anything to set him off. Even so, his volitle moods and angry outburst are a daily occurrence. Im terrified and feel very hopeless. Ive had to spend almost everything I was able to save while employed, since being unemployed and am now down to almost nothing. I cant get welfare or go to an abused womens shelter because I have no children. I have nowhere to go and no one who can help me. I dont want to be homeless, but I am afraid if I stay Im going to end up dead.
Ive never in my life asked anyone for a handout. Ive always had to be very independent and self reliant. Im a good person, and am the first to help others when they need it. I am smart, loyal, talented, trustworthy, compassionate and moral. And I dont deserve to be in this situation. Ive never been one to complain about my problems. I always thought, where theres a will, theres a way, and that if I worked hard enough I would get where I wanted to be. But Ive fought tooth and nail trying to get out of this hell Ive been trapped in for years now to no avail.
If anyone out there is in a position to help me, I would be eternally grateful. Unlike most other people, going home to live with mom & dad until I get back on feet just isnt an option for me. I NEED MONEY and I need it NOW. I either need a steady, stable job paying at least $60000 annually or enough money to support myself while I finish my college degree. My current debts (student loans, car, credit card & medical bills) total just under $40000!!! I pay $1800 cumulatively toward these debts alone per month. Add in a VERY modest budget of $2500 for the cost of living (rent, utilities, phone, food, gas, toiletries and other necessities like car maintenance, insurance, dog care expenses, etc) and I absolutely cannot live on less than $60000 annually, and even that will be very tight, considering how much taxes get taken out.
Ideally I would love to work with animals, and given the time and money I would love to go into Veterinary Medicine one day. Im also very interested in holistic health, both for animals and people, specifically, holistic nutrition, herbal medicine and holistic treatment of illness, afflictions and diseases. I dont have any job experience in these fields, but I am very knowledgeable in them through my own experiences and research. And I have a love of animals that would be hard to surpass. Im a very eager and fast learner. I have tons of experience doing just about everything office related; Im good with computers and different types of software and have experience managing a small staff. I have great leadership skills, am very organized and give much attention to details. I am a night person by nature, so early morning jobs can be difficult for me if there is a hard start time. I work best in less rigid environments, with more flexible hours. Please dont get the wrong impression however! I am a very diligent and reliable worker, and will always do my job efficiently. I have so much to offer and could be doing so much more with my life if given the chance.
Any job opportunities or cash donations would be greatly appreciated! Please help me to finally break free of this misery Ive been living in. I could never thank you enough!
Sincerely,
Jamie
Desperate to Escape Abusive Husband!
Posted by jamie-needshelp on 2011-03-19 22:58:17
NW-COLUMBUS, OH
I am a 27 year old woman who has been hopelessly stuck in an unbearably abusive relationship for 6 years now.
I was only 21 when I met my husband. I was a college student struggling to make ends meet on my own. Ive never had much in the way of familial support, my mother is an abusive alcoholic and my father left when I was 8. Therefore I held a full time job the entire time I was in school. It was a big accomplishment for me, but it was rough.
When my husband came along he seemed like the perfect guy. He was wonderful, funny, sweet, generous, smart, kind, he was easy to fall in love with. After only a few months we moved in together and he proposed on our one year anniversary. I put school on hold and quit my job to help him get his business off the ground, thinking, at the time since his earning potential was so much higher than mine, that it just made sense for us as a couple and a team.
It didn't take long though for him to change. He quickly became distant, depressed, violent and moody for no apparent reason. He began drinking in excess and popping pills frequently, lashing out at me over nothing, lying, hiding things and cheating. My happily ever after was now a living hell! Every time Id get fed up enough to leave he'd cry, apologize very sincerely and beg me to stay, promising he would change and admitting how wrong it was for him to treat me that way. When that stopped working he started trying to bully and control me, threatening me, emotionally manipulating me and being physically aggressive & abusive with me. My husband is 7 years my elder so at first I suppose I was naive and easy to manipulate...Because I believed him and loved him I stayed.
But by year three I had, had it with the abuse and no longer believed him when he promised to change, I now knew better. Unfortunately I didnt have a parent or family member I could go to for help. Therefore my options were to either be homeless or to stay with him until I was financially able to be on my own. So I decided to make a plan to leave him. I had worked on and off in the Real Estate industry since my college years and so I went out and got an entry level job in that field and opened up my own bank account so that I could put money aside to pay off my large amount of debts (over $45,000 in student loans, car, credit card, etc) and move out on my own.
It was hard putting money aside without him noticing, I could only use commission and bonus checks that he didnt know about to put in savings. After a year I had only managed to save just over $6000, which barely made a dent in my student loan debts, much less allowing me to pay off the others.
So I began searching for a better job. After about a dozen interviews I finally landed an assistant manager position in a leasing office at a property owned by the city that paid better and was more in line with my capabilities. The position required me to work in a very dangerous part of town. I was dealing with drug dealers, murders, and other various felons on a daily basis, having my life threatened and irate residents screaming in my face wasnt an abnormal occurrence! But I was so determined to get away from my husband that I stuck it out. In just under a year I was promoted to Property Manager after the previous one had quit. I was elated! Finally I would be making enough to get my own place. I worked from 9am to 9pm most days since we were understaffed. I never went home until everything was taken care of. I gave 200%, going above and beyond to make my property the best it could be. I often received compliments from my superiors and the owner of the company on my job performance as well.
However before I was able to move out, things took a terrible turn. About four months into my new position, the company had hired a new person to be my superior. Unfortunately for me this person, now being in a new position of power, decided that they wanted to give all their friends from their previous company jobs. Since there were no openings available they decided to terminate current employees in order to make positions for their friends. I was one of those people! I remember the day so vividly in my head, being told they were letting me go. I just kept asking why? Id never once done anything wrong, I got complimented on my work performance frequently and even the residents who used to hate me, now loved me! My new boss and the companys owner agreed, Id done nothing wrong and offered me severance pay. But I didnt need severance pay, I needed a job! I was devastated. I had come SO close I could taste it, just to have it all ripped away like a cruel joke of fate. I nearly had a nervous breakdown. The thought of having to start over again with a new company from square one, the thought of staying with my husband another day was unbearable. I couldnt understand why this was happening to me, Id worked SO hard and after more than 2 years, gotten no closer to getting away from him.
I tried to find a replacement job with equal pay right away with no luck. By now the economy was very bad and good job offers were few and far between. Employers could afford to be picky, and people with three times my experience were applying for the same jobs. I decided to meet with an employment lawyer to see what options I had about my situation with my previous employer. He agreed my termination was wrongful and thought I had a solid case, to at the very least, get a larger severance. But he also informed me that while I had been wrongfully terminated, in the state of Ohio, employment is at will and therefore employers are allowed to fire you for no reason, as long as they dont discriminate against you! He preceeded with legal action confident that they would agree to work something more reasonalbe out, but things did not go as hoped.
So here I am. Six years into an abusive relationship that Ive been trying to escape for three! Ive now been unemployed for 8 months. Aside from the bad economy, the fact that I have taken legal against an employer and no reference from that employer due to filing a complaint against them, has made me practically un-hirable in my field. Ive tried interviewing for other jobs, but I either dont have the experience or they dont pay even half of what Id need to take care of myself. Ive thought about going back to school, but, again money becomes an issue. Ive done the math and I simply cant afford it. Ive spoken with divorce lawyers and since I have no children and have worked during my marriage, a divorce wont render anything in the way of financial support.
Ive exhausted every option I can think of and need help desperately!!! At this point my life is like walking a tight rope, trying not to do anything or say anything to set him off. Even so, his volitle moods and angry outburst are a daily occurrence. Im terrified and feel very hopeless. Ive had to spend almost everything I was able to save while employed, since being unemployed and am now down to almost nothing. I cant get welfare or go to an abused womens shelter because I have no children. I have nowhere to go and no one who can help me. I dont want to be homeless, but I am afraid if I stay Im going to end up dead.
Ive never in my life asked anyone for a handout. Ive always had to be very independent and self reliant. Im a good person, and am the first to help others when they need it. I am smart, loyal, talented, trustworthy, compassionate and moral. And I dont deserve to be in this situation. Ive never been one to complain about my problems. I always thought, where theres a will, theres a way, and that if I worked hard enough I would get where I wanted to be. But Ive fought tooth and nail trying to get out of this hell Ive been trapped in for years now to no avail.
If anyone out there is in a position to help me, I would be eternally grateful. Unlike most other people, going home to live with mom & dad until I get back on feet just isnt an option for me. I NEED MONEY and I need it NOW. I either need a steady, stable job paying at least $60000 annually or enough money to support myself while I finish my college degree. My current debts (student loans, car, credit card & medical bills) total just under $40000!!! I pay $1800 cumulatively toward these debts alone per month. Add in a VERY modest budget of $2500 for the cost of living (rent, utilities, phone, food, gas, toiletries and other necessities like car maintenance, insurance, dog care expenses, etc) and I absolutely cannot live on less than $60000 annually, and even that will be very tight, considering how much taxes get taken out.
Ideally I would love to work with animals, and given the time and money I would love to go into Veterinary Medicine one day. Im also very interested in holistic health, both for animals and people, specifically, holistic nutrition, herbal medicine and holistic treatment of illness, afflictions and diseases. I dont have any job experience in these fields, but I am very knowledgeable in them through my own experiences and research. And I have a love of animals that would be hard to surpass. Im a very eager and fast learner. I have tons of experience doing just about everything office related; Im good with computers and different types of software and have experience managing a small staff. I have great leadership skills, am very organized and give much attention to details. I am a night person by nature, so early morning jobs can be difficult for me if there is a hard start time. I work best in less rigid environments, with more flexible hours. Please dont get the wrong impression however! I am a very diligent and reliable worker, and will always do my job efficiently. I have so much to offer and could be doing so much more with my life if given the chance.
Any job opportunities or cash donations would be greatly appreciated! Please help me to finally break free of this misery Ive been living in. I could never thank you enough!
Sincerely,
Jamie
I am a 27 year old woman who has been hopelessly stuck in an unbearably abusive relationship for 6 years now.
I was only 21 when I met my husband. I was a college student struggling to make ends meet on my own. Ive never had much in the way of familial support, my mother is an abusive alcoholic and my father left when I was 8. Therefore I held a full time job the entire time I was in school. It was a big accomplishment for me, but it was rough.
When my husband came along he seemed like the perfect guy. He was wonderful, funny, sweet, generous, smart, kind, he was easy to fall in love with. After only a few months we moved in together and he proposed on our one year anniversary. I put school on hold and quit my job to help him get his business off the ground, thinking, at the time since his earning potential was so much higher than mine, that it just made sense for us as a couple and a team.
It didn't take long though for him to change. He quickly became distant, depressed, violent and moody for no apparent reason. He began drinking in excess and popping pills frequently, lashing out at me over nothing, lying, hiding things and cheating. My happily ever after was now a living hell! Every time Id get fed up enough to leave he'd cry, apologize very sincerely and beg me to stay, promising he would change and admitting how wrong it was for him to treat me that way. When that stopped working he started trying to bully and control me, threatening me, emotionally manipulating me and being physically aggressive & abusive with me. My husband is 7 years my elder so at first I suppose I was naive and easy to manipulate...Because I believed him and loved him I stayed.
But by year three I had, had it with the abuse and no longer believed him when he promised to change, I now knew better. Unfortunately I didnt have a parent or family member I could go to for help. Therefore my options were to either be homeless or to stay with him until I was financially able to be on my own. So I decided to make a plan to leave him. I had worked on and off in the Real Estate industry since my college years and so I went out and got an entry level job in that field and opened up my own bank account so that I could put money aside to pay off my large amount of debts (over $45,000 in student loans, car, credit card, etc) and move out on my own.
It was hard putting money aside without him noticing, I could only use commission and bonus checks that he didnt know about to put in savings. After a year I had only managed to save just over $6000, which barely made a dent in my student loan debts, much less allowing me to pay off the others.
So I began searching for a better job. After about a dozen interviews I finally landed an assistant manager position in a leasing office at a property owned by the city that paid better and was more in line with my capabilities. The position required me to work in a very dangerous part of town. I was dealing with drug dealers, murders, and other various felons on a daily basis, having my life threatened and irate residents screaming in my face wasnt an abnormal occurrence! But I was so determined to get away from my husband that I stuck it out. In just under a year I was promoted to Property Manager after the previous one had quit. I was elated! Finally I would be making enough to get my own place. I worked from 9am to 9pm most days since we were understaffed. I never went home until everything was taken care of. I gave 200%, going above and beyond to make my property the best it could be. I often received compliments from my superiors and the owner of the company on my job performance as well.
However before I was able to move out, things took a terrible turn. About four months into my new position, the company had hired a new person to be my superior. Unfortunately for me this person, now being in a new position of power, decided that they wanted to give all their friends from their previous company jobs. Since there were no openings available they decided to terminate current employees in order to make positions for their friends. I was one of those people! I remember the day so vividly in my head, being told they were letting me go. I just kept asking why? Id never once done anything wrong, I got complimented on my work performance frequently and even the residents who used to hate me, now loved me! My new boss and the companys owner agreed, Id done nothing wrong and offered me severance pay. But I didnt need severance pay, I needed a job! I was devastated. I had come SO close I could taste it, just to have it all ripped away like a cruel joke of fate. I nearly had a nervous breakdown. The thought of having to start over again with a new company from square one, the thought of staying with my husband another day was unbearable. I couldnt understand why this was happening to me, Id worked SO hard and after more than 2 years, gotten no closer to getting away from him.
I tried to find a replacement job with equal pay right away with no luck. By now the economy was very bad and good job offers were few and far between. Employers could afford to be picky, and people with three times my experience were applying for the same jobs. I decided to meet with an employment lawyer to see what options I had about my situation with my previous employer. He agreed my termination was wrongful and thought I had a solid case, to at the very least, get a larger severance. But he also informed me that while I had been wrongfully terminated, in the state of Ohio, employment is at will and therefore employers are allowed to fire you for no reason, as long as they dont discriminate against you! He preceeded with legal action confident that they would agree to work something more reasonalbe out, but things did not go as hoped.
So here I am. Six years into an abusive relationship that Ive been trying to escape for three! Ive now been unemployed for 8 months. Aside from the bad economy, the fact that I have taken legal against an employer and no reference from that employer due to filing a complaint against them, has made me practically un-hirable in my field. Ive tried interviewing for other jobs, but I either dont have the experience or they dont pay even half of what Id need to take care of myself. Ive thought about going back to school, but, again money becomes an issue. Ive done the math and I simply cant afford it. Ive spoken with divorce lawyers and since I have no children and have worked during my marriage, a divorce wont render anything in the way of financial support.
Ive exhausted every option I can think of and need help desperately!!! At this point my life is like walking a tight rope, trying not to do anything or say anything to set him off. Even so, his volitle moods and angry outburst are a daily occurrence. Im terrified and feel very hopeless. Ive had to spend almost everything I was able to save while employed, since being unemployed and am now down to almost nothing. I cant get welfare or go to an abused womens shelter because I have no children. I have nowhere to go and no one who can help me. I dont want to be homeless, but I am afraid if I stay Im going to end up dead.
Ive never in my life asked anyone for a handout. Ive always had to be very independent and self reliant. Im a good person, and am the first to help others when they need it. I am smart, loyal, talented, trustworthy, compassionate and moral. And I dont deserve to be in this situation. Ive never been one to complain about my problems. I always thought, where theres a will, theres a way, and that if I worked hard enough I would get where I wanted to be. But Ive fought tooth and nail trying to get out of this hell Ive been trapped in for years now to no avail.
If anyone out there is in a position to help me, I would be eternally grateful. Unlike most other people, going home to live with mom & dad until I get back on feet just isnt an option for me. I NEED MONEY and I need it NOW. I either need a steady, stable job paying at least $60000 annually or enough money to support myself while I finish my college degree. My current debts (student loans, car, credit card & medical bills) total just under $40000!!! I pay $1800 cumulatively toward these debts alone per month. Add in a VERY modest budget of $2500 for the cost of living (rent, utilities, phone, food, gas, toiletries and other necessities like car maintenance, insurance, dog care expenses, etc) and I absolutely cannot live on less than $60000 annually, and even that will be very tight, considering how much taxes get taken out.
Ideally I would love to work with animals, and given the time and money I would love to go into Veterinary Medicine one day. Im also very interested in holistic health, both for animals and people, specifically, holistic nutrition, herbal medicine and holistic treatment of illness, afflictions and diseases. I dont have any job experience in these fields, but I am very knowledgeable in them through my own experiences and research. And I have a love of animals that would be hard to surpass. Im a very eager and fast learner. I have tons of experience doing just about everything office related; Im good with computers and different types of software and have experience managing a small staff. I have great leadership skills, am very organized and give much attention to details. I am a night person by nature, so early morning jobs can be difficult for me if there is a hard start time. I work best in less rigid environments, with more flexible hours. Please dont get the wrong impression however! I am a very diligent and reliable worker, and will always do my job efficiently. I have so much to offer and could be doing so much more with my life if given the chance.
Any job opportunities or cash donations would be greatly appreciated! Please help me to finally break free of this misery Ive been living in. I could never thank you enough!
Sincerely,
Jamie
Desperate to Escape Abusive Husband
Posted by jamie-needshelp on 2011-03-19 22:58:16
NW-COLUMBUS, OH
I am a 27 year old woman who has been hopelessly stuck in an unbearably abusive relationship for 6 years now.
I was only 21 when I met my husband. I was a college student struggling to make ends meet on my own. Ive never had much in the way of familial support, my mother is an abusive alcoholic and my father left when I was 8. Therefore I held a full time job the entire time I was in school. It was a big accomplishment for me, but it was rough.
When my husband came along he seemed like the perfect guy. He was wonderful, funny, sweet, generous, smart, kind, he was easy to fall in love with. After only a few months we moved in together and he proposed on our one year anniversary. I put school on hold and quit my job to help him get his business off the ground, thinking, at the time since his earning potential was so much higher than mine, that it just made sense for us as a couple and a team.
It didn't take long though for him to change. He quickly became distant, depressed, violent and moody for no apparent reason. He began drinking in excess and popping pills frequently, lashing out at me over nothing, lying, hiding things and cheating. My happily ever after was now a living hell! Every time Id get fed up enough to leave he'd cry, apologize very sincerely and beg me to stay, promising he would change and admitting how wrong it was for him to treat me that way. When that stopped working he started trying to bully and control me, threatening me, emotionally manipulating me and being physically aggressive & abusive with me. My husband is 7 years my elder so at first I suppose I was naive and easy to manipulate...Because I believed him and loved him I stayed.
But by year three I had, had it with the abuse and no longer believed him when he promised to change, I now knew better. Unfortunately I didnt have a parent or family member I could go to for help. Therefore my options were to either be homeless or to stay with him until I was financially able to be on my own. So I decided to make a plan to leave him. I had worked on and off in the Real Estate industry since my college years and so I went out and got an entry level job in that field and opened up my own bank account so that I could put money aside to pay off my large amount of debts (over $45,000 in student loans, car, credit card, etc) and move out on my own.
It was hard putting money aside without him noticing, I could only use commission and bonus checks that he didnt know about to put in savings. After a year I had only managed to save just over $6000, which barely made a dent in my student loan debts, much less allowing me to pay off the others.
So I began searching for a better job. After about a dozen interviews I finally landed an assistant manager position in a leasing office at a property owned by the city that paid better and was more in line with my capabilities. The position required me to work in a very dangerous part of town. I was dealing with drug dealers, murders, and other various felons on a daily basis, having my life threatened and irate residents screaming in my face wasnt an abnormal occurrence! But I was so determined to get away from my husband that I stuck it out. In just under a year I was promoted to Property Manager after the previous one had quit. I was elated! Finally I would be making enough to get my own place. I worked from 9am to 9pm most days since we were understaffed. I never went home until everything was taken care of. I gave 200%, going above and beyond to make my property the best it could be. I often received compliments from my superiors and the owner of the company on my job performance as well.
However before I was able to move out, things took a terrible turn. About four months into my new position, the company had hired a new person to be my superior. Unfortunately for me this person, now being in a new position of power, decided that they wanted to give all their friends from their previous company jobs. Since there were no openings available they decided to terminate current employees in order to make positions for their friends. I was one of those people! I remember the day so vividly in my head, being told they were letting me go. I just kept asking why? Id never once done anything wrong, I got complimented on my work performance frequently and even the residents who used to hate me, now loved me! My new boss and the companys owner agreed, Id done nothing wrong and offered me severance pay. But I didnt need severance pay, I needed a job! I was devastated. I had come SO close I could taste it, just to have it all ripped away like a cruel joke of fate. I nearly had a nervous breakdown. The thought of having to start over again with a new company from square one, the thought of staying with my husband another day was unbearable. I couldnt understand why this was happening to me, Id worked SO hard and after more than 2 years, gotten no closer to getting away from him.
I tried to find a replacement job with equal pay right away with no luck. By now the economy was very bad and good job offers were few and far between. Employers could afford to be picky, and people with three times my experience were applying for the same jobs. I decided to meet with an employment lawyer to see what options I had about my situation with my previous employer. He agreed my termination was wrongful and thought I had a solid case, to at the very least, get a larger severance. But he also informed me that while I had been wrongfully terminated, in the state of Ohio, employment is at will and therefore employers are allowed to fire you for no reason, as long as they dont discriminate against you! He preceeded with legal action confident that they would agree to work something more reasonalbe out, but things did not go as hoped.
So here I am. Six years into an abusive relationship that Ive been trying to escape for three! Ive now been unemployed for 8 months. Aside from the bad economy, the fact that I have taken legal against an employer and no reference from that employer due to filing a complaint against them, has made me practically un-hirable in my field. Ive tried interviewing for other jobs, but I either dont have the experience or they dont pay even half of what Id need to take care of myself. Ive thought about going back to school, but, again money becomes an issue. Ive done the math and I simply cant afford it. Ive spoken with divorce lawyers and since I have no children and have worked during my marriage, a divorce wont render anything in the way of financial support.
Ive exhausted every option I can think of and need help desperately!!! At this point my life is like walking a tight rope, trying not to do anything or say anything to set him off. Even so, his volitle moods and angry outburst are a daily occurrence. Im terrified and feel very hopeless. Ive had to spend almost everything I was able to save while employed, since being unemployed and am now down to almost nothing. I cant get welfare or go to an abused womens shelter because I have no children. I have nowhere to go and no one who can help me. I dont want to be homeless, but I am afraid if I stay Im going to end up dead.
Ive never in my life asked anyone for a handout. Ive always had to be very independent and self reliant. Im a good person, and am the first to help others when they need it. I am smart, loyal, talented, trustworthy, compassionate and moral. And I dont deserve to be in this situation. Ive never been one to complain about my problems. I always thought, where theres a will, theres a way, and that if I worked hard enough I would get where I wanted to be. But Ive fought tooth and nail trying to get out of this hell Ive been trapped in for years now to no avail.
If anyone out there is in a position to help me, I would be eternally grateful. Unlike most other people, going home to live with mom & dad until I get back on feet just isnt an option for me. I NEED MONEY and I need it NOW. I either need a steady, stable job paying at least $60000 annually or enough money to support myself while I finish my college degree. My current debts (student loans, car, credit card & medical bills) total just under $40000!!! I pay $1800 cumulatively toward these debts alone per month. Add in a VERY modest budget of $2500 for the cost of living (rent, utilities, phone, food, gas, toiletries and other necessities like car maintenance, insurance, dog care expenses, etc) and I absolutely cannot live on less than $60000 annually, and even that will be very tight, considering how much taxes get taken out.
Ideally I would love to work with animals, and given the time and money I would love to go into Veterinary Medicine one day. Im also very interested in holistic health, both for animals and people, specifically, holistic nutrition, herbal medicine and holistic treatment of illness, afflictions and diseases. I dont have any job experience in these fields, but I am very knowledgeable in them through my own experiences and research. And I have a love of animals that would be hard to surpass. Im a very eager and fast learner. I have tons of experience doing just about everything office related; Im good with computers and different types of software and have experience managing a small staff. I have great leadership skills, am very organized and give much attention to details. I am a night person by nature, so early morning jobs can be difficult for me if there is a hard start time. I work best in less rigid environments, with more flexible hours. Please dont get the wrong impression however! I am a very diligent and reliable worker, and will always do my job efficiently. I have so much to offer and could be doing so much more with my life if given the chance.
Any job opportunities or cash donations would be greatly appreciated! Please help me to finally break free of this misery Ive been living in. I could never thank you enough!
Sincerely,
Jamie
I am a 27 year old woman who has been hopelessly stuck in an unbearably abusive relationship for 6 years now.
I was only 21 when I met my husband. I was a college student struggling to make ends meet on my own. Ive never had much in the way of familial support, my mother is an abusive alcoholic and my father left when I was 8. Therefore I held a full time job the entire time I was in school. It was a big accomplishment for me, but it was rough.
When my husband came along he seemed like the perfect guy. He was wonderful, funny, sweet, generous, smart, kind, he was easy to fall in love with. After only a few months we moved in together and he proposed on our one year anniversary. I put school on hold and quit my job to help him get his business off the ground, thinking, at the time since his earning potential was so much higher than mine, that it just made sense for us as a couple and a team.
It didn't take long though for him to change. He quickly became distant, depressed, violent and moody for no apparent reason. He began drinking in excess and popping pills frequently, lashing out at me over nothing, lying, hiding things and cheating. My happily ever after was now a living hell! Every time Id get fed up enough to leave he'd cry, apologize very sincerely and beg me to stay, promising he would change and admitting how wrong it was for him to treat me that way. When that stopped working he started trying to bully and control me, threatening me, emotionally manipulating me and being physically aggressive & abusive with me. My husband is 7 years my elder so at first I suppose I was naive and easy to manipulate...Because I believed him and loved him I stayed.
But by year three I had, had it with the abuse and no longer believed him when he promised to change, I now knew better. Unfortunately I didnt have a parent or family member I could go to for help. Therefore my options were to either be homeless or to stay with him until I was financially able to be on my own. So I decided to make a plan to leave him. I had worked on and off in the Real Estate industry since my college years and so I went out and got an entry level job in that field and opened up my own bank account so that I could put money aside to pay off my large amount of debts (over $45,000 in student loans, car, credit card, etc) and move out on my own.
It was hard putting money aside without him noticing, I could only use commission and bonus checks that he didnt know about to put in savings. After a year I had only managed to save just over $6000, which barely made a dent in my student loan debts, much less allowing me to pay off the others.
So I began searching for a better job. After about a dozen interviews I finally landed an assistant manager position in a leasing office at a property owned by the city that paid better and was more in line with my capabilities. The position required me to work in a very dangerous part of town. I was dealing with drug dealers, murders, and other various felons on a daily basis, having my life threatened and irate residents screaming in my face wasnt an abnormal occurrence! But I was so determined to get away from my husband that I stuck it out. In just under a year I was promoted to Property Manager after the previous one had quit. I was elated! Finally I would be making enough to get my own place. I worked from 9am to 9pm most days since we were understaffed. I never went home until everything was taken care of. I gave 200%, going above and beyond to make my property the best it could be. I often received compliments from my superiors and the owner of the company on my job performance as well.
However before I was able to move out, things took a terrible turn. About four months into my new position, the company had hired a new person to be my superior. Unfortunately for me this person, now being in a new position of power, decided that they wanted to give all their friends from their previous company jobs. Since there were no openings available they decided to terminate current employees in order to make positions for their friends. I was one of those people! I remember the day so vividly in my head, being told they were letting me go. I just kept asking why? Id never once done anything wrong, I got complimented on my work performance frequently and even the residents who used to hate me, now loved me! My new boss and the companys owner agreed, Id done nothing wrong and offered me severance pay. But I didnt need severance pay, I needed a job! I was devastated. I had come SO close I could taste it, just to have it all ripped away like a cruel joke of fate. I nearly had a nervous breakdown. The thought of having to start over again with a new company from square one, the thought of staying with my husband another day was unbearable. I couldnt understand why this was happening to me, Id worked SO hard and after more than 2 years, gotten no closer to getting away from him.
I tried to find a replacement job with equal pay right away with no luck. By now the economy was very bad and good job offers were few and far between. Employers could afford to be picky, and people with three times my experience were applying for the same jobs. I decided to meet with an employment lawyer to see what options I had about my situation with my previous employer. He agreed my termination was wrongful and thought I had a solid case, to at the very least, get a larger severance. But he also informed me that while I had been wrongfully terminated, in the state of Ohio, employment is at will and therefore employers are allowed to fire you for no reason, as long as they dont discriminate against you! He preceeded with legal action confident that they would agree to work something more reasonalbe out, but things did not go as hoped.
So here I am. Six years into an abusive relationship that Ive been trying to escape for three! Ive now been unemployed for 8 months. Aside from the bad economy, the fact that I have taken legal against an employer and no reference from that employer due to filing a complaint against them, has made me practically un-hirable in my field. Ive tried interviewing for other jobs, but I either dont have the experience or they dont pay even half of what Id need to take care of myself. Ive thought about going back to school, but, again money becomes an issue. Ive done the math and I simply cant afford it. Ive spoken with divorce lawyers and since I have no children and have worked during my marriage, a divorce wont render anything in the way of financial support.
Ive exhausted every option I can think of and need help desperately!!! At this point my life is like walking a tight rope, trying not to do anything or say anything to set him off. Even so, his volitle moods and angry outburst are a daily occurrence. Im terrified and feel very hopeless. Ive had to spend almost everything I was able to save while employed, since being unemployed and am now down to almost nothing. I cant get welfare or go to an abused womens shelter because I have no children. I have nowhere to go and no one who can help me. I dont want to be homeless, but I am afraid if I stay Im going to end up dead.
Ive never in my life asked anyone for a handout. Ive always had to be very independent and self reliant. Im a good person, and am the first to help others when they need it. I am smart, loyal, talented, trustworthy, compassionate and moral. And I dont deserve to be in this situation. Ive never been one to complain about my problems. I always thought, where theres a will, theres a way, and that if I worked hard enough I would get where I wanted to be. But Ive fought tooth and nail trying to get out of this hell Ive been trapped in for years now to no avail.
If anyone out there is in a position to help me, I would be eternally grateful. Unlike most other people, going home to live with mom & dad until I get back on feet just isnt an option for me. I NEED MONEY and I need it NOW. I either need a steady, stable job paying at least $60000 annually or enough money to support myself while I finish my college degree. My current debts (student loans, car, credit card & medical bills) total just under $40000!!! I pay $1800 cumulatively toward these debts alone per month. Add in a VERY modest budget of $2500 for the cost of living (rent, utilities, phone, food, gas, toiletries and other necessities like car maintenance, insurance, dog care expenses, etc) and I absolutely cannot live on less than $60000 annually, and even that will be very tight, considering how much taxes get taken out.
Ideally I would love to work with animals, and given the time and money I would love to go into Veterinary Medicine one day. Im also very interested in holistic health, both for animals and people, specifically, holistic nutrition, herbal medicine and holistic treatment of illness, afflictions and diseases. I dont have any job experience in these fields, but I am very knowledgeable in them through my own experiences and research. And I have a love of animals that would be hard to surpass. Im a very eager and fast learner. I have tons of experience doing just about everything office related; Im good with computers and different types of software and have experience managing a small staff. I have great leadership skills, am very organized and give much attention to details. I am a night person by nature, so early morning jobs can be difficult for me if there is a hard start time. I work best in less rigid environments, with more flexible hours. Please dont get the wrong impression however! I am a very diligent and reliable worker, and will always do my job efficiently. I have so much to offer and could be doing so much more with my life if given the chance.
Any job opportunities or cash donations would be greatly appreciated! Please help me to finally break free of this misery Ive been living in. I could never thank you enough!
Sincerely,
Jamie
Desperate to get Away from Abusive Husband!
Posted by jamie-needshelp on 2011-03-19 22:58:13
NW-COLUMBUS, OH
I am a 27 year old woman who has been hopelessly stuck in an unbearably abusive relationship for 6 years now.
I was only 21 when I met my husband. I was a college student struggling to make ends meet on my own. Ive never had much in the way of familial support, my mother is an abusive alcoholic and my father left when I was 8. Therefore I held a full time job the entire time I was in school. It was a big accomplishment for me, but it was rough.
When my husband came along he seemed like the perfect guy. He was wonderful, funny, sweet, generous, smart, kind, he was easy to fall in love with. After only a few months we moved in together and he proposed on our one year anniversary. I put school on hold and quit my job to help him get his business off the ground, thinking, at the time since his earning potential was so much higher than mine, that it just made sense for us as a couple and a team.
It didn't take long though for him to change. He quickly became distant, depressed, violent and moody for no apparent reason. He began drinking in excess and popping pills frequently, lashing out at me over nothing, lying, hiding things and cheating. My happily ever after was now a living hell! Every time Id get fed up enough to leave he'd cry, apologize very sincerely and beg me to stay, promising he would change and admitting how wrong it was for him to treat me that way. When that stopped working he started trying to bully and control me, threatening me, emotionally manipulating me and being physically aggressive & abusive with me. My husband is 7 years my elder so at first I suppose I was naive and easy to manipulate...Because I believed him and loved him I stayed.
But by year three I had, had it with the abuse and no longer believed him when he promised to change, I now knew better. Unfortunately I didnt have a parent or family member I could go to for help. Therefore my options were to either be homeless or to stay with him until I was financially able to be on my own. So I decided to make a plan to leave him. I had worked on and off in the Real Estate industry since my college years and so I went out and got an entry level job in that field and opened up my own bank account so that I could put money aside to pay off my large amount of debts (over $45,000 in student loans, car, credit card, etc) and move out on my own.
It was hard putting money aside without him noticing, I could only use commission and bonus checks that he didnt know about to put in savings. After a year I had only managed to save just over $6000, which barely made a dent in my student loan debts, much less allowing me to pay off the others.
So I began searching for a better job. After about a dozen interviews I finally landed an assistant manager position in a leasing office at a property owned by the city that paid better and was more in line with my capabilities. The position required me to work in a very dangerous part of town. I was dealing with drug dealers, murders, and other various felons on a daily basis, having my life threatened and irate residents screaming in my face wasnt an abnormal occurrence! But I was so determined to get away from my husband that I stuck it out. In just under a year I was promoted to Property Manager after the previous one had quit. I was elated! Finally I would be making enough to get my own place. I worked from 9am to 9pm most days since we were understaffed. I never went home until everything was taken care of. I gave 200%, going above and beyond to make my property the best it could be. I often received compliments from my superiors and the owner of the company on my job performance as well.
However before I was able to move out, things took a terrible turn. About four months into my new position, the company had hired a new person to be my superior. Unfortunately for me this person, now being in a new position of power, decided that they wanted to give all their friends from their previous company jobs. Since there were no openings available they decided to terminate current employees in order to make positions for their friends. I was one of those people! I remember the day so vividly in my head, being told they were letting me go. I just kept asking why? Id never once done anything wrong, I got complimented on my work performance frequently and even the residents who used to hate me, now loved me! My new boss and the companys owner agreed, Id done nothing wrong and offered me severance pay. But I didnt need severance pay, I needed a job! I was devastated. I had come SO close I could taste it, just to have it all ripped away like a cruel joke of fate. I nearly had a nervous breakdown. The thought of having to start over again with a new company from square one, the thought of staying with my husband another day was unbearable. I couldnt understand why this was happening to me, Id worked SO hard and after more than 2 years, gotten no closer to getting away from him.
I tried to find a replacement job with equal pay right away with no luck. By now the economy was very bad and good job offers were few and far between. Employers could afford to be picky, and people with three times my experience were applying for the same jobs. I decided to meet with an employment lawyer to see what options I had about my situation with my previous employer. He agreed my termination was wrongful and thought I had a solid case, to at the very least, get a larger severance. But he also informed me that while I had been wrongfully terminated, in the state of Ohio, employment is at will and therefore employers are allowed to fire you for no reason, as long as they dont discriminate against you! He preceeded with legal action confident that they would agree to work something more reasonalbe out, but things did not go as hoped.
So here I am. Six years into an abusive relationship that Ive been trying to escape for three! Ive now been unemployed for 8 months. Aside from the bad economy, the fact that I have taken legal against an employer and no reference from that employer due to filing a complaint against them, has made me practically un-hirable in my field. Ive tried interviewing for other jobs, but I either dont have the experience or they dont pay even half of what Id need to take care of myself. Ive thought about going back to school, but, again money becomes an issue. Ive done the math and I simply cant afford it. Ive spoken with divorce lawyers and since I have no children and have worked during my marriage, a divorce wont render anything in the way of financial support.
Ive exhausted every option I can think of and need help desperately!!! At this point my life is like walking a tight rope, trying not to do anything or say anything to set him off. Even so, his volitle moods and angry outburst are a daily occurrence. Im terrified and feel very hopeless. Ive had to spend almost everything I was able to save while employed, since being unemployed and am now down to almost nothing. I cant get welfare or go to an abused womens shelter because I have no children. I have nowhere to go and no one who can help me. I dont want to be homeless, but I am afraid if I stay Im going to end up dead.
Ive never in my life asked anyone for a handout. Ive always had to be very independent and self reliant. Im a good person, and am the first to help others when they need it. I am smart, loyal, talented, trustworthy, compassionate and moral. And I dont deserve to be in this situation. Ive never been one to complain about my problems. I always thought, where theres a will, theres a way, and that if I worked hard enough I would get where I wanted to be. But Ive fought tooth and nail trying to get out of this hell Ive been trapped in for years now to no avail.
If anyone out there is in a position to help me, I would be eternally grateful. Unlike most other people, going home to live with mom & dad until I get back on feet just isnt an option for me. I NEED MONEY and I need it NOW. I either need a steady, stable job paying at least $60000 annually or enough money to support myself while I finish my college degree. My current debts (student loans, car, credit card & medical bills) total just under $40000!!! I pay $1800 cumulatively toward these debts alone per month. Add in a VERY modest budget of $2500 for the cost of living (rent, utilities, phone, food, gas, toiletries and other necessities like car maintenance, insurance, dog care expenses, etc) and I absolutely cannot live on less than $60000 annually, and even that will be very tight, considering how much taxes get taken out.
Ideally I would love to work with animals, and given the time and money I would love to go into Veterinary Medicine one day. Im also very interested in holistic health, both for animals and people, specifically, holistic nutrition, herbal medicine and holistic treatment of illness, afflictions and diseases. I dont have any job experience in these fields, but I am very knowledgeable in them through my own experiences and research. And I have a love of animals that would be hard to surpass. Im a very eager and fast learner. I have tons of experience doing just about everything office related; Im good with computers and different types of software and have experience managing a small staff. I have great leadership skills, am very organized and give much attention to details. I am a night person by nature, so early morning jobs can be difficult for me if there is a hard start time. I work best in less rigid environments, with more flexible hours. Please dont get the wrong impression however! I am a very diligent and reliable worker, and will always do my job efficiently. I have so much to offer and could be doing so much more with my life if given the chance.
Any job opportunities or cash donations would be greatly appreciated! Please help me to finally break free of this misery Ive been living in. I could never thank you enough!
Sincerely,
Jamie
I am a 27 year old woman who has been hopelessly stuck in an unbearably abusive relationship for 6 years now.
I was only 21 when I met my husband. I was a college student struggling to make ends meet on my own. Ive never had much in the way of familial support, my mother is an abusive alcoholic and my father left when I was 8. Therefore I held a full time job the entire time I was in school. It was a big accomplishment for me, but it was rough.
When my husband came along he seemed like the perfect guy. He was wonderful, funny, sweet, generous, smart, kind, he was easy to fall in love with. After only a few months we moved in together and he proposed on our one year anniversary. I put school on hold and quit my job to help him get his business off the ground, thinking, at the time since his earning potential was so much higher than mine, that it just made sense for us as a couple and a team.
It didn't take long though for him to change. He quickly became distant, depressed, violent and moody for no apparent reason. He began drinking in excess and popping pills frequently, lashing out at me over nothing, lying, hiding things and cheating. My happily ever after was now a living hell! Every time Id get fed up enough to leave he'd cry, apologize very sincerely and beg me to stay, promising he would change and admitting how wrong it was for him to treat me that way. When that stopped working he started trying to bully and control me, threatening me, emotionally manipulating me and being physically aggressive & abusive with me. My husband is 7 years my elder so at first I suppose I was naive and easy to manipulate...Because I believed him and loved him I stayed.
But by year three I had, had it with the abuse and no longer believed him when he promised to change, I now knew better. Unfortunately I didnt have a parent or family member I could go to for help. Therefore my options were to either be homeless or to stay with him until I was financially able to be on my own. So I decided to make a plan to leave him. I had worked on and off in the Real Estate industry since my college years and so I went out and got an entry level job in that field and opened up my own bank account so that I could put money aside to pay off my large amount of debts (over $45,000 in student loans, car, credit card, etc) and move out on my own.
It was hard putting money aside without him noticing, I could only use commission and bonus checks that he didnt know about to put in savings. After a year I had only managed to save just over $6000, which barely made a dent in my student loan debts, much less allowing me to pay off the others.
So I began searching for a better job. After about a dozen interviews I finally landed an assistant manager position in a leasing office at a property owned by the city that paid better and was more in line with my capabilities. The position required me to work in a very dangerous part of town. I was dealing with drug dealers, murders, and other various felons on a daily basis, having my life threatened and irate residents screaming in my face wasnt an abnormal occurrence! But I was so determined to get away from my husband that I stuck it out. In just under a year I was promoted to Property Manager after the previous one had quit. I was elated! Finally I would be making enough to get my own place. I worked from 9am to 9pm most days since we were understaffed. I never went home until everything was taken care of. I gave 200%, going above and beyond to make my property the best it could be. I often received compliments from my superiors and the owner of the company on my job performance as well.
However before I was able to move out, things took a terrible turn. About four months into my new position, the company had hired a new person to be my superior. Unfortunately for me this person, now being in a new position of power, decided that they wanted to give all their friends from their previous company jobs. Since there were no openings available they decided to terminate current employees in order to make positions for their friends. I was one of those people! I remember the day so vividly in my head, being told they were letting me go. I just kept asking why? Id never once done anything wrong, I got complimented on my work performance frequently and even the residents who used to hate me, now loved me! My new boss and the companys owner agreed, Id done nothing wrong and offered me severance pay. But I didnt need severance pay, I needed a job! I was devastated. I had come SO close I could taste it, just to have it all ripped away like a cruel joke of fate. I nearly had a nervous breakdown. The thought of having to start over again with a new company from square one, the thought of staying with my husband another day was unbearable. I couldnt understand why this was happening to me, Id worked SO hard and after more than 2 years, gotten no closer to getting away from him.
I tried to find a replacement job with equal pay right away with no luck. By now the economy was very bad and good job offers were few and far between. Employers could afford to be picky, and people with three times my experience were applying for the same jobs. I decided to meet with an employment lawyer to see what options I had about my situation with my previous employer. He agreed my termination was wrongful and thought I had a solid case, to at the very least, get a larger severance. But he also informed me that while I had been wrongfully terminated, in the state of Ohio, employment is at will and therefore employers are allowed to fire you for no reason, as long as they dont discriminate against you! He preceeded with legal action confident that they would agree to work something more reasonalbe out, but things did not go as hoped.
So here I am. Six years into an abusive relationship that Ive been trying to escape for three! Ive now been unemployed for 8 months. Aside from the bad economy, the fact that I have taken legal against an employer and no reference from that employer due to filing a complaint against them, has made me practically un-hirable in my field. Ive tried interviewing for other jobs, but I either dont have the experience or they dont pay even half of what Id need to take care of myself. Ive thought about going back to school, but, again money becomes an issue. Ive done the math and I simply cant afford it. Ive spoken with divorce lawyers and since I have no children and have worked during my marriage, a divorce wont render anything in the way of financial support.
Ive exhausted every option I can think of and need help desperately!!! At this point my life is like walking a tight rope, trying not to do anything or say anything to set him off. Even so, his volitle moods and angry outburst are a daily occurrence. Im terrified and feel very hopeless. Ive had to spend almost everything I was able to save while employed, since being unemployed and am now down to almost nothing. I cant get welfare or go to an abused womens shelter because I have no children. I have nowhere to go and no one who can help me. I dont want to be homeless, but I am afraid if I stay Im going to end up dead.
Ive never in my life asked anyone for a handout. Ive always had to be very independent and self reliant. Im a good person, and am the first to help others when they need it. I am smart, loyal, talented, trustworthy, compassionate and moral. And I dont deserve to be in this situation. Ive never been one to complain about my problems. I always thought, where theres a will, theres a way, and that if I worked hard enough I would get where I wanted to be. But Ive fought tooth and nail trying to get out of this hell Ive been trapped in for years now to no avail.
If anyone out there is in a position to help me, I would be eternally grateful. Unlike most other people, going home to live with mom & dad until I get back on feet just isnt an option for me. I NEED MONEY and I need it NOW. I either need a steady, stable job paying at least $60000 annually or enough money to support myself while I finish my college degree. My current debts (student loans, car, credit card & medical bills) total just under $40000!!! I pay $1800 cumulatively toward these debts alone per month. Add in a VERY modest budget of $2500 for the cost of living (rent, utilities, phone, food, gas, toiletries and other necessities like car maintenance, insurance, dog care expenses, etc) and I absolutely cannot live on less than $60000 annually, and even that will be very tight, considering how much taxes get taken out.
Ideally I would love to work with animals, and given the time and money I would love to go into Veterinary Medicine one day. Im also very interested in holistic health, both for animals and people, specifically, holistic nutrition, herbal medicine and holistic treatment of illness, afflictions and diseases. I dont have any job experience in these fields, but I am very knowledgeable in them through my own experiences and research. And I have a love of animals that would be hard to surpass. Im a very eager and fast learner. I have tons of experience doing just about everything office related; Im good with computers and different types of software and have experience managing a small staff. I have great leadership skills, am very organized and give much attention to details. I am a night person by nature, so early morning jobs can be difficult for me if there is a hard start time. I work best in less rigid environments, with more flexible hours. Please dont get the wrong impression however! I am a very diligent and reliable worker, and will always do my job efficiently. I have so much to offer and could be doing so much more with my life if given the chance.
Any job opportunities or cash donations would be greatly appreciated! Please help me to finally break free of this misery Ive been living in. I could never thank you enough!
Sincerely,
Jamie
Desperate to Get Away from my Abusive Husband
Posted by jamie-needshelp on 2011-03-19 22:58:10
NW-COLUMBUS, OH
I am a 27 year old woman who has been hopelessly stuck in an unbearably abusive relationship for 6 years now.
I was only 21 when I met my husband. I was a college student struggling to make ends meet on my own. Ive never had much in the way of familial support, my mother is an abusive alcoholic and my father left when I was 8. Therefore I held a full time job the entire time I was in school. It was a big accomplishment for me, but it was rough.
When my husband came along he seemed like the perfect guy. He was wonderful, funny, sweet, generous, smart, kind, he was easy to fall in love with. After only a few months we moved in together and he proposed on our one year anniversary. I put school on hold and quit my job to help him get his business off the ground, thinking, at the time since his earning potential was so much higher than mine, that it just made sense for us as a couple and a team.
It didn't take long though for him to change. He quickly became distant, depressed, violent and moody for no apparent reason. He began drinking in excess and popping pills frequently, lashing out at me over nothing, lying, hiding things and cheating. My happily ever after was now a living hell! Every time Id get fed up enough to leave he'd cry, apologize very sincerely and beg me to stay, promising he would change and admitting how wrong it was for him to treat me that way. When that stopped working he started trying to bully and control me, threatening me, emotionally manipulating me and being physically aggressive & abusive with me. My husband is 7 years my elder so at first I suppose I was naive and easy to manipulate...Because I believed him and loved him I stayed.
But by year three I had, had it with the abuse and no longer believed him when he promised to change, I now knew better. Unfortunately I didnt have a parent or family member I could go to for help. Therefore my options were to either be homeless or to stay with him until I was financially able to be on my own. So I decided to make a plan to leave him. I had worked on and off in the Real Estate industry since my college years and so I went out and got an entry level job in that field and opened up my own bank account so that I could put money aside to pay off my large amount of debts (over $45,000 in student loans, car, credit card, etc) and move out on my own.
It was hard putting money aside without him noticing, I could only use commission and bonus checks that he didnt know about to put in savings. After a year I had only managed to save just over $6000, which barely made a dent in my student loan debts, much less allowing me to pay off the others.
So I began searching for a better job. After about a dozen interviews I finally landed an assistant manager position in a leasing office at a property owned by the city that paid better and was more in line with my capabilities. The position required me to work in a very dangerous part of town. I was dealing with drug dealers, murders, and other various felons on a daily basis, having my life threatened and irate residents screaming in my face wasnt an abnormal occurrence! But I was so determined to get away from my husband that I stuck it out. In just under a year I was promoted to Property Manager after the previous one had quit. I was elated! Finally I would be making enough to get my own place. I worked from 9am to 9pm most days since we were understaffed. I never went home until everything was taken care of. I gave 200%, going above and beyond to make my property the best it could be. I often received compliments from my superiors and the owner of the company on my job performance as well.
However before I was able to move out, things took a terrible turn. About four months into my new position, the company had hired a new person to be my superior. Unfortunately for me this person, now being in a new position of power, decided that they wanted to give all their friends from their previous company jobs. Since there were no openings available they decided to terminate current employees in order to make positions for their friends. I was one of those people! I remember the day so vividly in my head, being told they were letting me go. I just kept asking why? Id never once done anything wrong, I got complimented on my work performance frequently and even the residents who used to hate me, now loved me! My new boss and the companys owner agreed, Id done nothing wrong and offered me severance pay. But I didnt need severance pay, I needed a job! I was devastated. I had come SO close I could taste it, just to have it all ripped away like a cruel joke of fate. I nearly had a nervous breakdown. The thought of having to start over again with a new company from square one, the thought of staying with my husband another day was unbearable. I couldnt understand why this was happening to me, Id worked SO hard and after more than 2 years, gotten no closer to getting away from him.
I tried to find a replacement job with equal pay right away with no luck. By now the economy was very bad and good job offers were few and far between. Employers could afford to be picky, and people with three times my experience were applying for the same jobs. I decided to meet with an employment lawyer to see what options I had about my situation with my previous employer. He agreed my termination was wrongful and thought I had a solid case, to at the very least, get a larger severance. But he also informed me that while I had been wrongfully terminated, in the state of Ohio, employment is at will and therefore employers are allowed to fire you for no reason, as long as they dont discriminate against you! He preceeded with legal action confident that they would agree to work something more reasonalbe out, but things did not go as hoped.
So here I am. Six years into an abusive relationship that Ive been trying to escape for three! Ive now been unemployed for 8 months. Aside from the bad economy, the fact that I have taken legal against an employer and no reference from that employer due to filing a complaint against them, has made me practically un-hirable in my field. Ive tried interviewing for other jobs, but I either dont have the experience or they dont pay even half of what Id need to take care of myself. Ive thought about going back to school, but, again money becomes an issue. Ive done the math and I simply cant afford it. Ive spoken with divorce lawyers and since I have no children and have worked during my marriage, a divorce wont render anything in the way of financial support.
Ive exhausted every option I can think of and need help desperately!!! At this point my life is like walking a tight rope, trying not to do anything or say anything to set him off. Even so, his volitle moods and angry outburst are a daily occurrence. Im terrified and feel very hopeless. Ive had to spend almost everything I was able to save while employed, since being unemployed and am now down to almost nothing. I cant get welfare or go to an abused womens shelter because I have no children. I have nowhere to go and no one who can help me. I dont want to be homeless, but I am afraid if I stay Im going to end up dead.
Ive never in my life asked anyone for a handout. Ive always had to be very independent and self reliant. Im a good person, and am the first to help others when they need it. I am smart, loyal, talented, trustworthy, compassionate and moral. And I dont deserve to be in this situation. Ive never been one to complain about my problems. I always thought, where theres a will, theres a way, and that if I worked hard enough I would get where I wanted to be. But Ive fought tooth and nail trying to get out of this hell Ive been trapped in for years now to no avail.
If anyone out there is in a position to help me, I would be eternally grateful. Unlike most other people, going home to live with mom & dad until I get back on feet just isnt an option for me. I NEED MONEY and I need it NOW. I either need a steady, stable job paying at least $60000 annually or enough money to support myself while I finish my college degree. My current debts (student loans, car, credit card & medical bills) total just under $40000!!! I pay $1800 cumulatively toward these debts alone per month. Add in a VERY modest budget of $2500 for the cost of living (rent, utilities, phone, food, gas, toiletries and other necessities like car maintenance, insurance, dog care expenses, etc) and I absolutely cannot live on less than $60000 annually, and even that will be very tight, considering how much taxes get taken out.
Ideally I would love to work with animals, and given the time and money I would love to go into Veterinary Medicine one day. Im also very interested in holistic health, both for animals and people, specifically, holistic nutrition, herbal medicine and holistic treatment of illness, afflictions and diseases. I dont have any job experience in these fields, but I am very knowledgeable in them through my own experiences and research. And I have a love of animals that would be hard to surpass. Im a very eager and fast learner. I have tons of experience doing just about everything office related; Im good with computers and different types of software and have experience managing a small staff. I have great leadership skills, am very organized and give much attention to details. I am a night person by nature, so early morning jobs can be difficult for me if there is a hard start time. I work best in less rigid environments, with more flexible hours. Please dont get the wrong impression however! I am a very diligent and reliable worker, and will always do my job efficiently. I have so much to offer and could be doing so much more with my life if given the chance.
Any job opportunities or cash donations would be greatly appreciated! Please help me to finally break free of this misery Ive been living in. I could never thank you enough!
Sincerely,
Jamie
I am a 27 year old woman who has been hopelessly stuck in an unbearably abusive relationship for 6 years now.
I was only 21 when I met my husband. I was a college student struggling to make ends meet on my own. Ive never had much in the way of familial support, my mother is an abusive alcoholic and my father left when I was 8. Therefore I held a full time job the entire time I was in school. It was a big accomplishment for me, but it was rough.
When my husband came along he seemed like the perfect guy. He was wonderful, funny, sweet, generous, smart, kind, he was easy to fall in love with. After only a few months we moved in together and he proposed on our one year anniversary. I put school on hold and quit my job to help him get his business off the ground, thinking, at the time since his earning potential was so much higher than mine, that it just made sense for us as a couple and a team.
It didn't take long though for him to change. He quickly became distant, depressed, violent and moody for no apparent reason. He began drinking in excess and popping pills frequently, lashing out at me over nothing, lying, hiding things and cheating. My happily ever after was now a living hell! Every time Id get fed up enough to leave he'd cry, apologize very sincerely and beg me to stay, promising he would change and admitting how wrong it was for him to treat me that way. When that stopped working he started trying to bully and control me, threatening me, emotionally manipulating me and being physically aggressive & abusive with me. My husband is 7 years my elder so at first I suppose I was naive and easy to manipulate...Because I believed him and loved him I stayed.
But by year three I had, had it with the abuse and no longer believed him when he promised to change, I now knew better. Unfortunately I didnt have a parent or family member I could go to for help. Therefore my options were to either be homeless or to stay with him until I was financially able to be on my own. So I decided to make a plan to leave him. I had worked on and off in the Real Estate industry since my college years and so I went out and got an entry level job in that field and opened up my own bank account so that I could put money aside to pay off my large amount of debts (over $45,000 in student loans, car, credit card, etc) and move out on my own.
It was hard putting money aside without him noticing, I could only use commission and bonus checks that he didnt know about to put in savings. After a year I had only managed to save just over $6000, which barely made a dent in my student loan debts, much less allowing me to pay off the others.
So I began searching for a better job. After about a dozen interviews I finally landed an assistant manager position in a leasing office at a property owned by the city that paid better and was more in line with my capabilities. The position required me to work in a very dangerous part of town. I was dealing with drug dealers, murders, and other various felons on a daily basis, having my life threatened and irate residents screaming in my face wasnt an abnormal occurrence! But I was so determined to get away from my husband that I stuck it out. In just under a year I was promoted to Property Manager after the previous one had quit. I was elated! Finally I would be making enough to get my own place. I worked from 9am to 9pm most days since we were understaffed. I never went home until everything was taken care of. I gave 200%, going above and beyond to make my property the best it could be. I often received compliments from my superiors and the owner of the company on my job performance as well.
However before I was able to move out, things took a terrible turn. About four months into my new position, the company had hired a new person to be my superior. Unfortunately for me this person, now being in a new position of power, decided that they wanted to give all their friends from their previous company jobs. Since there were no openings available they decided to terminate current employees in order to make positions for their friends. I was one of those people! I remember the day so vividly in my head, being told they were letting me go. I just kept asking why? Id never once done anything wrong, I got complimented on my work performance frequently and even the residents who used to hate me, now loved me! My new boss and the companys owner agreed, Id done nothing wrong and offered me severance pay. But I didnt need severance pay, I needed a job! I was devastated. I had come SO close I could taste it, just to have it all ripped away like a cruel joke of fate. I nearly had a nervous breakdown. The thought of having to start over again with a new company from square one, the thought of staying with my husband another day was unbearable. I couldnt understand why this was happening to me, Id worked SO hard and after more than 2 years, gotten no closer to getting away from him.
I tried to find a replacement job with equal pay right away with no luck. By now the economy was very bad and good job offers were few and far between. Employers could afford to be picky, and people with three times my experience were applying for the same jobs. I decided to meet with an employment lawyer to see what options I had about my situation with my previous employer. He agreed my termination was wrongful and thought I had a solid case, to at the very least, get a larger severance. But he also informed me that while I had been wrongfully terminated, in the state of Ohio, employment is at will and therefore employers are allowed to fire you for no reason, as long as they dont discriminate against you! He preceeded with legal action confident that they would agree to work something more reasonalbe out, but things did not go as hoped.
So here I am. Six years into an abusive relationship that Ive been trying to escape for three! Ive now been unemployed for 8 months. Aside from the bad economy, the fact that I have taken legal against an employer and no reference from that employer due to filing a complaint against them, has made me practically un-hirable in my field. Ive tried interviewing for other jobs, but I either dont have the experience or they dont pay even half of what Id need to take care of myself. Ive thought about going back to school, but, again money becomes an issue. Ive done the math and I simply cant afford it. Ive spoken with divorce lawyers and since I have no children and have worked during my marriage, a divorce wont render anything in the way of financial support.
Ive exhausted every option I can think of and need help desperately!!! At this point my life is like walking a tight rope, trying not to do anything or say anything to set him off. Even so, his volitle moods and angry outburst are a daily occurrence. Im terrified and feel very hopeless. Ive had to spend almost everything I was able to save while employed, since being unemployed and am now down to almost nothing. I cant get welfare or go to an abused womens shelter because I have no children. I have nowhere to go and no one who can help me. I dont want to be homeless, but I am afraid if I stay Im going to end up dead.
Ive never in my life asked anyone for a handout. Ive always had to be very independent and self reliant. Im a good person, and am the first to help others when they need it. I am smart, loyal, talented, trustworthy, compassionate and moral. And I dont deserve to be in this situation. Ive never been one to complain about my problems. I always thought, where theres a will, theres a way, and that if I worked hard enough I would get where I wanted to be. But Ive fought tooth and nail trying to get out of this hell Ive been trapped in for years now to no avail.
If anyone out there is in a position to help me, I would be eternally grateful. Unlike most other people, going home to live with mom & dad until I get back on feet just isnt an option for me. I NEED MONEY and I need it NOW. I either need a steady, stable job paying at least $60000 annually or enough money to support myself while I finish my college degree. My current debts (student loans, car, credit card & medical bills) total just under $40000!!! I pay $1800 cumulatively toward these debts alone per month. Add in a VERY modest budget of $2500 for the cost of living (rent, utilities, phone, food, gas, toiletries and other necessities like car maintenance, insurance, dog care expenses, etc) and I absolutely cannot live on less than $60000 annually, and even that will be very tight, considering how much taxes get taken out.
Ideally I would love to work with animals, and given the time and money I would love to go into Veterinary Medicine one day. Im also very interested in holistic health, both for animals and people, specifically, holistic nutrition, herbal medicine and holistic treatment of illness, afflictions and diseases. I dont have any job experience in these fields, but I am very knowledgeable in them through my own experiences and research. And I have a love of animals that would be hard to surpass. Im a very eager and fast learner. I have tons of experience doing just about everything office related; Im good with computers and different types of software and have experience managing a small staff. I have great leadership skills, am very organized and give much attention to details. I am a night person by nature, so early morning jobs can be difficult for me if there is a hard start time. I work best in less rigid environments, with more flexible hours. Please dont get the wrong impression however! I am a very diligent and reliable worker, and will always do my job efficiently. I have so much to offer and could be doing so much more with my life if given the chance.
Any job opportunities or cash donations would be greatly appreciated! Please help me to finally break free of this misery Ive been living in. I could never thank you enough!
Sincerely,
Jamie
Quadriplegic vs. Taxman
Posted by bucks_stop_here on 2010-09-30 05:58:58
I need $700 to settle an unpaid income tax bill.
I have a severe physical disability but am able to do freelance work from home. I make enough money to barely scrape by in a decent year (though this has been a rotten, recession-plagued year), but it both (1) IS enough to disqualify me from public assistance and (2) ISN'T enough to keep me, year after year, from facing an unfair 13% self-employment tax that I can't pay. Disabled people who try to be self-reliant but are working poor are caught in a game that's impossible to win, and I'm sick of it! If you have a few dollars to spare, please either click the PayPal button below or fold some cash inside a piece of paper, put it in an envelope, and mail to Boxholder, POB 195, Arcata, CA 95518.
I have a severe physical disability but am able to do freelance work from home. I make enough money to barely scrape by in a decent year (though this has been a rotten, recession-plagued year), but it both (1) IS enough to disqualify me from public assistance and (2) ISN'T enough to keep me, year after year, from facing an unfair 13% self-employment tax that I can't pay. Disabled people who try to be self-reliant but are working poor are caught in a game that's impossible to win, and I'm sick of it! If you have a few dollars to spare, please either click the PayPal button below or fold some cash inside a piece of paper, put it in an envelope, and mail to Boxholder, POB 195, Arcata, CA 95518.
Quadriplegic vs. Taxman
Posted by bucks_stop_here on 2010-09-27 07:58:58
I need $700 to settle an unpaid income tax bill.
I have a severe physical disability but am able to do freelance work from home. I make enough money to barely scrape by in a decent year (though this has been a rotten, recession-plagued year), but it both (1) IS enough to disqualify me from public assistance and (2) ISN'T enough to keep me, year after year, from facing an unfair 13% self-employment tax that I can't pay. Disabled people who try to be self-reliant but are working poor are caught in a game that's impossible to win, and I'm sick of it! If you have a few dollars to spare, please either click the PayPal button below or fold some cash inside a piece of paper, put it in an envelope, and mail to Boxholder, POB 195, Arcata, CA 95518.
I have a severe physical disability but am able to do freelance work from home. I make enough money to barely scrape by in a decent year (though this has been a rotten, recession-plagued year), but it both (1) IS enough to disqualify me from public assistance and (2) ISN'T enough to keep me, year after year, from facing an unfair 13% self-employment tax that I can't pay. Disabled people who try to be self-reliant but are working poor are caught in a game that's impossible to win, and I'm sick of it! If you have a few dollars to spare, please either click the PayPal button below or fold some cash inside a piece of paper, put it in an envelope, and mail to Boxholder, POB 195, Arcata, CA 95518.
