Preferably Tags

Hi.

Thanks for taking the time to read my request. I'm 30 years old, still in college and living with my parents. I've made a lot of great accomplishments in my life with far less support than most people who make it this far. Of course, with that said I've also made plenty of mistakes.

I grew up with a single parent, and another parent who visited annually just to stir up emotions and make my life miserable. When I was 18, I decided to work really hard to lose weight so that I could join the US Air Force. I had a strict plan that I was going to follow to succeed in life.

Unfortunately my superiors in the USAF would not accommodate that plan to independence as they forced me to find my own way from the barracks to work (a 40 mi drive), so I had to immediately struggle to get my drivers licence and I had to buy a car on an Airman's paygrade.

My income wasn't enough to afford the car and gas and other living needs that I was expected to pay, so eventually I had to leave the Air Force before my term was up (under honorable conditions). I tried to work as a civilian. The transfer was tough and I was vastly uninformed about what to do and what my options were. I'm the first first generation college student of my extended family.

After some petty jobs that would each take more than 10 years to be able to earn enough to live independently, I finally found a nice nighttime custodian job that was at least simple enough for that kind of pay. I was the night time custodian, but I was also a guy to have on call at this retirement home where I worked. If people's toilets flooded or a nearly deaf resident left their tv on past quiet hours (once I could hear one through 3 floors!) I was the guy to send up to fix it.

Having my first satisfying job as a civilian, I was able to investigate community college during the day, so eventually I enrolled and tried taking a few classes while working full-time. College was my saving grace. I never felt like I belonged anywhere until I first started to take college courses in math, science, and philosophy. I found the tutoring lounge on campus, made a lot of friends there, and I spent many hours cramming and helping those in need.

This soon led to me finding financial aid, making arrangements with my parents (my mom and my stepfather) to let me go to school full-time while I lived with them, and putting in my 2 weeks notice at work to focus exclusively on school.

My counselors advised that I pick where I want to transfer to and then figure out the details of how to get there after I got accepted. I think this was bad advice. While I ended up choosing to transfer to a university that had my desired major, Biophysics, it was 60 miles away from where my parents lived. My car that I had bought when I was in the Air Force also eventually broke down from not being able to afford maintenance while I worked, and was towed away for being in the public street for too long.

Finally, I got accepted to UC San Diego to work towards a degree in Physics with a specialty in Biophysics. When it came time to transfer, I got as involved as I could on how and when I was supposed to receive the financial aid so that I could go get an apartment and everything, and my school kept telling me, "you should get it tomorrow" until about 2 weeks into my first quarter when I finally got the support.

Despite this rocky start, I managed to get into a good shape for myself, making my way slowly but surely through school. Learning a great deal. Eventually when I felt the struggle was too difficult, I changed my major to Neuroscience before I began my upper division coursework.

So, as I settled into my schooling and struggled with maintaining financial independence on financial aid, I managed to get myself into maintaining a great aquarium hobby, owned two great little kittens from a street cat program, led as president of a student organization for one year, and eventually I got married. I also carefully learned about the stock market and managed to make some great gains with money that I had invested from financial aid savings.

In 2010, my gains were over 100%. That amounted to $2000 doubling itself, but still, that says a lot about me as a trader. However, 6 months into my marriage, she said she wanted out, grabbed the car that we both paid into (most of the money was mine from stocks; $5500 worth), and refused to pay her share of 2 months rent. That happened in December of the year of 2010.

2011 was a difficult year for me. I fought hard to maintain things, especially my head, but it was tough. I lost 45 lbs from exercising regularly, made lots of new friends, and I got some volunteer work experience in a Neuroscience lab. But I just couldn't focus well enough to maintain my finances and my grades, so I had to drop out and live back with my parents.

Despite how tough it's been, not finding work, struggling with the ins and outs of the VA, and just needing a professional therapist to talk to and help me keep my head straight but never being able to get one, I've managed to recuperate well enough and learn a lot more about this bottom floor of society that I've been so desperately trying to escape my whole life.

I've gone looking for opportunity in every direction. I've tried changing my career goals, collecting recyclables, writing online, trying any online scheme that didn't include me forking out money to get it, imagining what I could write as a novel, tried to make money through playing video games, making goal after goal after goal for myself, but still just not being able to get just the right amount of money to put me back on my feet.

I'll be going back to school in April at the risk of having to do it as a homeless person if the VA doesn't pull through for me. They recently approved my 10% service connected disability status and now I need to jump over a few more hurdles to get my more significant service connected disabilities recognized. I'm also seeing what the vocational rehab people can do for me despite the bureaucratic issues that are stopping them from helping me all the way.

BTW, this whole time that I've gone through life with common lower class difficulties, I've been disabled with a number of small conditions that all add up to a hard time. I have lower back issues that the military has yet to own up to. Community college found also that I have a learning disability which makes some intellectual tasks show up as lower than average ability for me while the rest of my intellect is high enough to expect that I could easily get a Masters Degree or a PhD. My biggest difficulty in school is that they don't give me enough time to show them what I know or what I'm capable of.

From working with special needs students as a tutor, I have proven to myself that there is a major problem in the education system. Most teachers never simplify the material into a clear picture of what they want to teach. If you want someone to learn something, the last thing you should be fuzzy on is what it is exactly that you want them to learn. We can't all work like intuitive Jedi or sophisticated parrots.

If you help me out, here is a list of the priorities of what your money will go towards, in order of their priority If you would like to request that I spend your donation on a specific cause, please let me know:

1. A working cheap economic vehicle.
I need something that I can sleep in and that will take me wherever I need to go. Preferably something that can stow quite a few recyclables as well to pay for gas, but not an SUV or truck or van (Unless that's all that is cheap of course. Not likely but you never know.).
I'll aim for great gas mileage, but I'm thinking that I should attend some police car auctions to see what the cheapest deal I can find is. This car would make a great shelter for me while I return to my far away school.

2. Investing on the stock market.
Trust me, I know how to fish. If you want to send me a request for proof I'd be glad to compose some evidence of my finest moments as well as my worst to show you that I can do well for myself on the stock market, even during the recession. What I could really use right now, is a little bait. Trading is good money for me, but to make enough to make gains worth more than the commission cost (about $10), you need about $300-1000 per investment. $300 is more for the high risk lottery plays on the market. I even made a blog about it if you would like to see:
http://www.squidoo.com/TheYoungidealistEconomyBlog
If you are willing, we can arrange something personal so that you wont need to worry about me putting the money you offer at high risk and blow it all. Might even be able to arrange something where I could make money for you to prove myself before accepting your donation. Whatever the case, I know we'd have to make it a personal arrangement to satisfy the current laws.

3. Working towards paying my debts to my friends.
My friends have been really supportive through these hard times, though they are starving students themselves. To keep up my morale they've bought me food, given me a place to crash when they could, and even paid to have me join them at fun local events. I have some money that I've promised them back, and I plan on making due on those promises as soon as possible.

4. Paying off my debts with companies.
I've had times where I couldn't afford to pay for rent and had to leave, like when my wife left me to live with her parents. These issues follow me on my credit score and I would like to work towards removing them so that I can turn my life around.

5. Getting a good start towards paying off my student loans.
I know I won't be able to pay them off before I find a good career with my degree. I would just like to have something to start making some automatic payments with and put that part of my bad credit score behind me as well.

6. Buying a home.
My mom never owned a home. No offense meant to land lords out there, but I really think the rental system is way out of line. My mom was always a hard worker. Way better than me, yet she could never own a home because she didn't have the money. Meanwhile, people with money could live in great big houses for less than she even had to pay.
I want a house to own. Probably start with a condo and seek ways to improve it and flip a profit out of it. Then I want to keep building up money from housing until I can manage to build an apartment building.
If I could, I'd like to make an apartment building near a university that offers cheap housing using the Japanese capsule model or something even more economic and more comfortable.

7. Making an online tutoring site meant to offer free tutoring and tutoring for tips. Imagine a site (I have yet to know of one) where people can collect their resources on a class, much like they collect info on ratemyprofessor.com, but also seek help from others who are taking the class or who have taken the class. Donors like you can offer money to tutors who post their notes and stories on the site, alongside ratings from other students that they helped.
Some tutors can offer their rates for help, sell their notes online for cheap, or just offer their help whenever they can and ask to be tipped through paypal if someone likes their work. My hope is that such a site could help to put an end to sophistry in the college system once and for all, making education easy and affordable for everyone.

8. After I have everything I'm hoping for above, the sky is the limit. But I would prefer to put the extra money that I don't need to good uses. I would spread a little philanthropy around, give to others in need on this site and through other resources.
I'd also look to teach others how to fish. I think a great way for the economy to be fixed would be if philanthropists made some really good employee owned companies. Make the place pay for itself, skim a little off the top, and walk away knowing that you really were a job creator.
I think that everyone who is capable of work and who chooses to work deserves to have their own independent living situation. I know that we are a long way from that, but I tend to be an optimist. I would like to try and make the world a better place, if nothing else.

Aside form financial help, I'm interested in anything else that I could get that's useful. Advice, Neuroscience Career connections, work, hobby or volunteer work that can easily become lucrative, I'm really all ears. Thanks again for taking the time to read my request. I hope you find it in you to help me out, even get to know me if you'd like. Bet you $5000 I can make you laugh. Did I win? >;) it was worth a try anyway.

I have been on disability for several years now, primarily for bipolar disorder, but also from back and neck injuries sustained from being hit by a drunk driver on new year's eve several years ago. I barely make enough to cover my bills and to buy food to eat, and there is never anything left over, and often there isn't enough, leaving me having to beg for money from friends or family members, who often don't have it and can't give anything. I have been stuck at home for years because I cannot even afford gas to go out in town unless I have to go to the doctor, grocery store, drug store, etc. I do not even want to think about trying to meet a person for a relationship because I feel like I have nothing to offer someone when I can barely take care of myself. Sometimes the despair makes me just want to lie in bed and never get up or swallow a bottle of pills so it will all be over. Living a lonely solitary life is killing me. I have a college degree in psychology and have worked my entire adult life trying to help adults, teenagers, and children to have better lives for themselves, and now I am stuck in the boat where many of them have been, where I feel like there's no hope. I had a lot of problems working also because I live in the southern US where not only racism is rampant (though I'm white), but they also treat people like me the same as they do blacks, and by that I mean people who are bisexual, or open-minded, or who people assume to be gay. I have been fired from jobs, harassed, threatened, passed over for jobs, etc., to the point that years ago I got sick of even trying to work in such a hostile environment when all I ever did was accept everyone and try to help anyone in need. I could never fathom why everybody hated me so much just from general assumptions that I "might" be gay, having never told anyone anything, though I have had relationships with men and women. People here are so anti-gay that it is downright dangerous to make yourself known. They will create vicious lies and rumors to try to destroy your life, will not hire you for jobs, will fire you, threaten and harass you. Further, ever since I was a young boy, I have also been physically abused because of this. White trash rednecks love to do this, and it has been done to me many times-they will kidnap you, drag you off into the woods, tie you to a tree or down in the back of a truck or string you up between two trees, or even act like they're going to hang you, and then they gang rape you, and then they threaten to kill you and your family if you ever tell on them. And you can't go to the police because they're usually there raping you too. I've had to call in the FBI on them several times, and the National Guard has even had to show its presence in our town before because these vigilante KKK rednecks are so threatening towards anybody who isn't a redneck. They think there's only 2 kinds of people, rednecks and queers. Or whites and blacks. I'm white but they label me a queer, and to them, that's just as bad as being black. So therefore, they beat me and rape me. My mother taught me at a young age to play dead, and I had to do it several times growing up. I also had to play like Brer Rabbit and tell them to please not leave me in the woods or I might die, but it's what I wanted because I was a boy scout and I knew I could survive if they'd just leave me alone and let me live. They even had a hand in killing my mother many years ago, and they also kill anyone who gets close to trying to expose them. You learn to stay away from them and to keep your mouth shut and maybe they'll let you live and find somebody else to rape and abuse. By the way, I'm in southern Alabama, in Washington County, and in surrounding counties it's the same. Besides wanting to be able to have a decent life, I want to get out of this area and be free for the first time in my life. Even while in college and working as an adult, I've encountered more redneck KKK vigilantes, both male and female, always hellbent on killing queers, as they say it. I want to be able to afford to move somewhere else, preferably to Florida or to California, to a place where nobody knows me and maybe I can hide out and start over, and also where people are more accepting of people who choose to not be a redneck. I am tired of being hated for being a perfectly normal human being. I know from college that we are all bisexual creatures and that there is nothing wrong with me. Hell, these rednecks are raping young boys, so they're the queers and child molesters, so why the hell would they be threatening me? The answer is because they want to be free to rape and molest whoever they want and they always get away with it, because this area is full of corrupt police and sheriffs and politicians and wealthy townfolk who can get away with murder repeatedly. I just want out, so please help me to be able to move to a safer environment so that I might live a decent and normal life one day, and so I might also can bring myself out of depression and learn to walk in the sun again and hopefully also find love like I want and not be afraid to feel and express my emotions. I cannot believe that in 2012 they have such control over everyone in the redneck south to the point that people are afraid to live normal lives. And yes, every single word of this is true, so please help. At the rate I'm going, I'll never be able to afford to move elsewhere and to get away from this hellhole called southern Alabama. Even in the last several years, I was near our local river at the boat landing parking lot talking to a friend when the police showed up and started to harass us and called us queers for being two men talking in a parking lot. He then made us stay there and called two friends of his to come there, and while the policeman held a gun on us, they raped me and made me give the two redneck men blow jobs and kept slamming the truck door on my head and punching and kicking me. I did successfully get that policeman moved to another town after I went to the hospital after I was raped, but he wasn't fired. The other two men were never tried for their crimes, but someone did end up murdering one of them. This place is awful, you just have no idea. Another incident I'll tell you about before I end this is one weekend I was working a new part time job on top of my full time job at a maximum security mental hospital. My boss at work, a nurse, had a brother who owned a lake, and he needed someone to take care of general maintenance and help out guests and such. Well to try to me out, they had me stay there one weekend, in my own cabin, with just one guest on the lake, and he was in a cabin down the hill. Well, I found out during the course of this weekend that the nurse and her brother were in the KKK and this man staying at the lake had paid them to be able to hunt him a real life queer at the lake. So he kept harassing me and threatening me and coming to my cabin at night with his guns and even one time chased me down the pier and I had to jump into the lake fully clothed, wallet, shoes, jeans, and all, swimming as deep as I could and moving side to side and spinning underwater because this psycho man was shooting bullets at me! I felt like I was in a movie, and I thankfully didn't get hit but several bullets whizzed by me underwater, and I held my breath and swam clear across the lake underwater and only came up when I had to because I had no breath left, and I had to spend the entire night hiding among the lilypads with my head barely sticking out of the water, for fear that he might see me, even though I was across the lake and there wasn't enough moonlight for him to see me from that far away. I was freezing and sick by the next morning, not to mention having a nervous breakdown after being hunted. My brother and his fiance' got me a lawyer and we were advised by him not to pursue it or they would murder us all. The nurse even admitted to the setup at work the next week, and was surprised that I had shown back up, because she figured I'd have been bagged by the hunter.

I have been on disability for several years now, primarily for bipolar disorder, but also from back and neck injuries sustained from being hit by a drunk driver on new year's eve several years ago. I barely make enough to cover my bills and to buy food to eat, and there is never anything left over, and often there isn't enough, leaving me having to beg for money from friends or family members, who often don't have it and can't give anything. I have been stuck at home for years because I cannot even afford gas to go out in town unless I have to go to the doctor, grocery store, drug store, etc. I do not even want to think about trying to meet a person for a relationship because I feel like I have nothing to offer someone when I can barely take care of myself. Sometimes the despair makes me just want to lie in bed and never get up or swallow a bottle of pills so it will all be over. Living a lonely solitary life is killing me. I have a college degree in psychology and have worked my entire adult life trying to help adults, teenagers, and children to have better lives for themselves, and now I am stuck in the boat where many of them have been, where I feel like there's no hope. I had a lot of problems working also because I live in the southern US where not only racism is rampant (though I'm white), but they also treat people like me the same as they do blacks, and by that I mean people who are bisexual, or open-minded, or who people assume to be gay. I have been fired from jobs, harassed, threatened, passed over for jobs, etc., to the point that years ago I got sick of even trying to work in such a hostile environment when all I ever did was accept everyone and try to help anyone in need. I could never fathom why everybody hated me so much just from general assumptions that I "might" be gay, having never told anyone anything, though I have had relationships with men and women. People here are so anti-gay that it is downright dangerous to make yourself known. They will create vicious lies and rumors to try to destroy your life, will not hire you for jobs, will fire you, threaten and harass you. Further, ever since I was a young boy, I have also been physically abused because of this. White trash rednecks love to do this, and it has been done to me many times-they will kidnap you, drag you off into the woods, tie you to a tree or down in the back of a truck or string you up between two trees, or even act like they're going to hang you, and then they gang rape you, and then they threaten to kill you and your family if you ever tell on them. And you can't go to the police because they're usually there raping you too. I've had to call in the FBI on them several times, and the National Guard has even had to show its presence in our town before because these vigilante KKK rednecks are so threatening towards anybody who isn't a redneck. They think there's only 2 kinds of people, rednecks and queers. Or whites and blacks. I'm white but they label me a queer, and to them, that's just as bad as being black. So therefore, they beat me and rape me. My mother taught me at a young age to play dead, and I had to do it several times growing up. I also had to play like Brer Rabbit and tell them to please not leave me in the woods or I might die, but it's what I wanted because I was a boy scout and I knew I could survive if they'd just leave me alone and let me live. They even had a hand in killing my mother many years ago, and they also kill anyone who gets close to trying to expose them. You learn to stay away from them and to keep your mouth shut and maybe they'll let you live and find somebody else to rape and abuse. By the way, I'm in southern Alabama, in Washington County, and in surrounding counties it's the same. Besides wanting to be able to have a decent life, I want to get out of this area and be free for the first time in my life. Even while in college and working as an adult, I've encountered more redneck KKK vigilantes, both male and female, always hellbent on killing queers, as they say it. I want to be able to afford to move somewhere else, preferably to Florida or to California, to a place where nobody knows me and maybe I can hide out and start over, and also where people are more accepting of people who choose to not be a redneck. I am tired of being hated for being a perfectly normal human being. I know from college that we are all bisexual creatures and that there is nothing wrong with me. Hell, these rednecks are raping young boys, so they're the queers and child molesters, so why the hell would they be threatening me? The answer is because they want to be free to rape and molest whoever they want and they always get away with it, because this area is full of corrupt police and sheriffs and politicians and wealthy townfolk who can get away with murder repeatedly. I just want out, so please help me to be able to move to a safer environment so that I might live a decent and normal life one day, and so I might also can bring myself out of depression and learn to walk in the sun again and hopefully also find love like I want and not be afraid to feel and express my emotions. I cannot believe that in 2012 they have such control over everyone in the redneck south to the point that people are afraid to live normal lives. And yes, every single word of this is true, so please help. At the rate I'm going, I'll never be able to afford to move elsewhere and to get away from this hellhole called southern Alabama. Even in the last several years, I was near our local river at the boat landing parking lot talking to a friend when the police showed up and started to harass us and called us queers for being two men talking in a parking lot. He then made us stay there and called two friends of his to come there, and while the policeman held a gun on us, they raped me and made me give the two redneck men blow jobs and kept slamming the truck door on my head and punching and kicking me. I did successfully get that policeman moved to another town after I went to the hospital after I was raped, but he wasn't fired. The other two men were never tried for their crimes, but someone did end up murdering one of them. This place is awful, you just have no idea. Another incident I'll tell you about before I end this is one weekend I was working a new part time job on top of my full time job at a maximum security mental hospital. My boss at work, a nurse, had a brother who owned a lake, and he needed someone to take care of general maintenance and help out guests and such. Well to try to me out, they had me stay there one weekend, in my own cabin, with just one guest on the lake, and he was in a cabin down the hill. Well, I found out during the course of this weekend that the nurse and her brother were in the KKK and this man staying at the lake had paid them to be able to hunt him a real life queer at the lake. So he kept harassing me and threatening me and coming to my cabin at night with his guns and even one time chased me down the pier and I had to jump into the lake fully clothed, wallet, shoes, jeans, and all, swimming as deep as I could and moving side to side and spinning underwater because this psycho man was shooting bullets at me! I felt like I was in a movie, and I thankfully didn't get hit but several bullets whizzed by me underwater, and I held my breath and swam clear across the lake underwater and only came up when I had to because I had no breath left, and I had to spend the entire night hiding among the lilypads with my head barely sticking out of the water, for fear that he might see me, even though I was across the lake and there wasn't enough moonlight for him to see me from that far away. I was freezing and sick by the next morning, not to mention having a nervous breakdown after being hunted. My brother and his fiance' got me a lawyer and we were advised by him not to pursue it or they would murder us all. The nurse even admitted to the setup at work the next week, and was surprised that I had shown back up, because she figured I'd have been bagged by the hunter.

I have been on disability for several years now, primarily for bipolar disorder, but also from back and neck injuries sustained from being hit by a drunk driver on new year's eve several years ago. I barely make enough to cover my bills and to buy food to eat, and there is never anything left over, and often there isn't enough, leaving me having to beg for money from friends or family members, who often don't have it and can't give anything. I have been stuck at home for years because I cannot even afford gas to go out in town unless I have to go to the doctor, grocery store, drug store, etc. I do not even want to think about trying to meet a person for a relationship because I feel like I have nothing to offer someone when I can barely take care of myself. Sometimes the despair makes me just want to lie in bed and never get up or swallow a bottle of pills so it will all be over. Living a lonely solitary life is killing me. I have a college degree in psychology and have worked my entire adult life trying to help adults, teenagers, and children to have better lives for themselves, and now I am stuck in the boat where many of them have been, where I feel like there's no hope. I had a lot of problems working also because I live in the southern US where not only racism is rampant (though I'm white), but they also treat people like me the same as they do blacks, and by that I mean people who are bisexual, or open-minded, or who people assume to be gay. I have been fired from jobs, harassed, threatened, passed over for jobs, etc., to the point that years ago I got sick of even trying to work in such a hostile environment when all I ever did was accept everyone and try to help anyone in need. I could never fathom why everybody hated me so much just from general assumptions that I "might" be gay, having never told anyone anything, though I have had relationships with men and women. People here are so anti-gay that it is downright dangerous to make yourself known. They will create vicious lies and rumors to try to destroy your life, will not hire you for jobs, will fire you, threaten and harass you. Further, ever since I was a young boy, I have also been physically abused because of this. White trash rednecks love to do this, and it has been done to me many times-they will kidnap you, drag you off into the woods, tie you to a tree or down in the back of a truck or string you up between two trees, or even act like they're going to hang you, and then they gang rape you, and then they threaten to kill you and your family if you ever tell on them. And you can't go to the police because they're usually there raping you too. I've had to call in the FBI on them several times, and the National Guard has even had to show its presence in our town before because these vigilante KKK rednecks are so threatening towards anybody who isn't a redneck. They think there's only 2 kinds of people, rednecks and queers. Or whites and blacks. I'm white but they label me a queer, and to them, that's just as bad as being black. So therefore, they beat me and rape me. My mother taught me at a young age to play dead, and I had to do it several times growing up. I also had to play like Brer Rabbit and tell them to please not leave me in the woods or I might die, but it's what I wanted because I was a boy scout and I knew I could survive if they'd just leave me alone and let me live. They even had a hand in killing my mother many years ago, and they also kill anyone who gets close to trying to expose them. You learn to stay away from them and to keep your mouth shut and maybe they'll let you live and find somebody else to rape and abuse. By the way, I'm in southern Alabama, in Washington County, and in surrounding counties it's the same. Besides wanting to be able to have a decent life, I want to get out of this area and be free for the first time in my life. Even while in college and working as an adult, I've encountered more redneck KKK vigilantes, both male and female, always hellbent on killing queers, as they say it. I want to be able to afford to move somewhere else, preferably to Florida or to California, to a place where nobody knows me and maybe I can hide out and start over, and also where people are more accepting of people who choose to not be a redneck. I am tired of being hated for being a perfectly normal human being. I know from college that we are all bisexual creatures and that there is nothing wrong with me. Hell, these rednecks are raping young boys, so they're the queers and child molesters, so why the hell would they be threatening me? The answer is because they want to be free to rape and molest whoever they want and they always get away with it, because this area is full of corrupt police and sheriffs and politicians and wealthy townfolk who can get away with murder repeatedly. I just want out, so please help me to be able to move to a safer environment so that I might live a decent and normal life one day, and so I might also can bring myself out of depression and learn to walk in the sun again and hopefully also find love like I want and not be afraid to feel and express my emotions. I cannot believe that in 2012 they have such control over everyone in the redneck south to the point that people are afraid to live normal lives. And yes, every single word of this is true, so please help. At the rate I'm going, I'll never be able to afford to move elsewhere and to get away from this hellhole called southern Alabama. Even in the last several years, I was near our local river at the boat landing parking lot talking to a friend when the police showed up and started to harass us and called us queers for being two men talking in a parking lot. He then made us stay there and called two friends of his to come there, and while the policeman held a gun on us, they raped me and made me give the two redneck men blow jobs and kept slamming the truck door on my head and punching and kicking me. I did successfully get that policeman moved to another town after I went to the hospital after I was raped, but he wasn't fired. The other two men were never tried for their crimes, but someone did end up murdering one of them. This place is awful, you just have no idea. Another incident I'll tell you about before I end this is one weekend I was working a new part time job on top of my full time job at a maximum security mental hospital. My boss at work, a nurse, had a brother who owned a lake, and he needed someone to take care of general maintenance and help out guests and such. Well to try to me out, they had me stay there one weekend, in my own cabin, with just one guest on the lake, and he was in a cabin down the hill. Well, I found out during the course of this weekend that the nurse and her brother were in the KKK and this man staying at the lake had paid them to be able to hunt him a real life queer at the lake. So he kept harassing me and threatening me and coming to my cabin at night with his guns and even one time chased me down the pier and I had to jump into the lake fully clothed, wallet, shoes, jeans, and all, swimming as deep as I could and moving side to side and spinning underwater because this psycho man was shooting bullets at me! I felt like I was in a movie, and I thankfully didn't get hit but several bullets whizzed by me underwater, and I held my breath and swam clear across the lake underwater and only came up when I had to because I had no breath left, and I had to spend the entire night hiding among the lilypads with my head barely sticking out of the water, for fear that he might see me, even though I was across the lake and there wasn't enough moonlight for him to see me from that far away. I was freezing and sick by the next morning, not to mention having a nervous breakdown after being hunted. My brother and his fiance' got me a lawyer and we were advised by him not to pursue it or they would murder us all. The nurse even admitted to the setup at work the next week, and was surprised that I had shown back up, because she figured I'd have been bagged by the hunter.

I have been on disability for several years now, primarily for bipolar disorder, but also from back and neck injuries sustained from being hit by a drunk driver on new year's eve several years ago. I barely make enough to cover my bills and to buy food to eat, and there is never anything left over, and often there isn't enough, leaving me having to beg for money from friends or family members, who often don't have it and can't give anything. I have been stuck at home for years because I cannot even afford gas to go out in town unless I have to go to the doctor, grocery store, drug store, etc. I do not even want to think about trying to meet a person for a relationship because I feel like I have nothing to offer someone when I can barely take care of myself. Sometimes the despair makes me just want to lie in bed and never get up or swallow a bottle of pills so it will all be over. Living a lonely solitary life is killing me. I have a college degree in psychology and have worked my entire adult life trying to help adults, teenagers, and children to have better lives for themselves, and now I am stuck in the boat where many of them have been, where I feel like there's no hope. I had a lot of problems working also because I live in the southern US where not only racism is rampant (though I'm white), but they also treat people like me the same as they do blacks, and by that I mean people who are bisexual, or open-minded, or who people assume to be gay. I have been fired from jobs, harassed, threatened, passed over for jobs, etc., to the point that years ago I got sick of even trying to work in such a hostile environment when all I ever did was accept everyone and try to help anyone in need. I could never fathom why everybody hated me so much just from general assumptions that I "might" be gay, having never told anyone anything, though I have had relationships with men and women. People here are so anti-gay that it is downright dangerous to make yourself known. They will create vicious lies and rumors to try to destroy your life, will not hire you for jobs, will fire you, threaten and harass you. Further, ever since I was a young boy, I have also been physically abused because of this. White trash rednecks love to do this, and it has been done to me many times-they will kidnap you, drag you off into the woods, tie you to a tree or down in the back of a truck or string you up between two trees, or even act like they're going to hang you, and then they gang rape you, and then they threaten to kill you and your family if you ever tell on them. And you can't go to the police because they're usually there raping you too. I've had to call in the FBI on them several times, and the National Guard has even had to show its presence in our town before because these vigilante KKK rednecks are so threatening towards anybody who isn't a redneck. They think there's only 2 kinds of people, rednecks and queers. Or whites and blacks. I'm white but they label me a queer, and to them, that's just as bad as being black. So therefore, they beat me and rape me. My mother taught me at a young age to play dead, and I had to do it several times growing up. I also had to play like Brer Rabbit and tell them to please not leave me in the woods or I might die, but it's what I wanted because I was a boy scout and I knew I could survive if they'd just leave me alone and let me live. They even had a hand in killing my mother many years ago, and they also kill anyone who gets close to trying to expose them. You learn to stay away from them and to keep your mouth shut and maybe they'll let you live and find somebody else to rape and abuse. By the way, I'm in southern Alabama, in Washington County, and in surrounding counties it's the same. Besides wanting to be able to have a decent life, I want to get out of this area and be free for the first time in my life. Even while in college and working as an adult, I've encountered more redneck KKK vigilantes, both male and female, always hellbent on killing queers, as they say it. I want to be able to afford to move somewhere else, preferably to Florida or to California, to a place where nobody knows me and maybe I can hide out and start over, and also where people are more accepting of people who choose to not be a redneck. I am tired of being hated for being a perfectly normal human being. I know from college that we are all bisexual creatures and that there is nothing wrong with me. Hell, these rednecks are raping young boys, so they're the queers and child molesters, so why the hell would they be threatening me? The answer is because they want to be free to rape and molest whoever they want and they always get away with it, because this area is full of corrupt police and sheriffs and politicians and wealthy townfolk who can get away with murder repeatedly. I just want out, so please help me to be able to move to a safer environment so that I might live a decent and normal life one day, and so I might also can bring myself out of depression and learn to walk in the sun again and hopefully also find love like I want and not be afraid to feel and express my emotions. I cannot believe that in 2012 they have such control over everyone in the redneck south to the point that people are afraid to live normal lives. And yes, every single word of this is true, so please help. At the rate I'm going, I'll never be able to afford to move elsewhere and to get away from this hellhole called southern Alabama. Even in the last several years, I was near our local river at the boat landing parking lot talking to a friend when the police showed up and started to harass us and called us queers for being two men talking in a parking lot. He then made us stay there and called two friends of his to come there, and while the policeman held a gun on us, they raped me and made me give the two redneck men blow jobs and kept slamming the truck door on my head and punching and kicking me. I did successfully get that policeman moved to another town after I went to the hospital after I was raped, but he wasn't fired. The other two men were never tried for their crimes, but someone did end up murdering one of them. This place is awful, you just have no idea. Another incident I'll tell you about before I end this is one weekend I was working a new part time job on top of my full time job at a maximum security mental hospital. My boss at work, a nurse, had a brother who owned a lake, and he needed someone to take care of general maintenance and help out guests and such. Well to try to me out, they had me stay there one weekend, in my own cabin, with just one guest on the lake, and he was in a cabin down the hill. Well, I found out during the course of this weekend that the nurse and her brother were in the KKK and this man staying at the lake had paid them to be able to hunt him a real life queer at the lake. So he kept harassing me and threatening me and coming to my cabin at night with his guns and even one time chased me down the pier and I had to jump into the lake fully clothed, wallet, shoes, jeans, and all, swimming as deep as I could and moving side to side and spinning underwater because this psycho man was shooting bullets at me! I felt like I was in a movie, and I thankfully didn't get hit but several bullets whizzed by me underwater, and I held my breath and swam clear across the lake underwater and only came up when I had to because I had no breath left, and I had to spend the entire night hiding among the lilypads with my head barely sticking out of the water, for fear that he might see me, even though I was across the lake and there wasn't enough moonlight for him to see me from that far away. I was freezing and sick by the next morning, not to mention having a nervous breakdown after being hunted. My brother and his fiance' got me a lawyer and we were advised by him not to pursue it or they would murder us all. The nurse even admitted to the setup at work the next week, and was surprised that I had shown back up, because she figured I'd have been bagged by the hunter.

I have been on disability for several years now, primarily for bipolar disorder, but also from back and neck injuries sustained from being hit by a drunk driver on new year's eve several years ago. I barely make enough to cover my bills and to buy food to eat, and there is never anything left over, and often there isn't enough, leaving me having to beg for money from friends or family members, who often don't have it and can't give anything. I have been stuck at home for years because I cannot even afford gas to go out in town unless I have to go to the doctor, grocery store, drug store, etc. I do not even want to think about trying to meet a person for a relationship because I feel like I have nothing to offer someone when I can barely take care of myself. Sometimes the despair makes me just want to lie in bed and never get up or swallow a bottle of pills so it will all be over. Living a lonely solitary life is killing me. I have a college degree in psychology and have worked my entire adult life trying to help adults, teenagers, and children to have better lives for themselves, and now I am stuck in the boat where many of them have been, where I feel like there's no hope. I had a lot of problems working also because I live in the southern US where not only racism is rampant (though I'm white), but they also treat people like me the same as they do blacks, and by that I mean people who are bisexual, or open-minded, or who people assume to be gay. I have been fired from jobs, harassed, threatened, passed over for jobs, etc., to the point that years ago I got sick of even trying to work in such a hostile environment when all I ever did was accept everyone and try to help anyone in need. I could never fathom why everybody hated me so much just from general assumptions that I "might" be gay, having never told anyone anything, though I have had relationships with men and women. People here are so anti-gay that it is downright dangerous to make yourself known. They will create vicious lies and rumors to try to destroy your life, will not hire you for jobs, will fire you, threaten and harass you. Further, ever since I was a young boy, I have also been physically abused because of this. White trash rednecks love to do this, and it has been done to me many times-they will kidnap you, drag you off into the woods, tie you to a tree or down in the back of a truck or string you up between two trees, or even act like they're going to hang you, and then they gang rape you, and then they threaten to kill you and your family if you ever tell on them. And you can't go to the police because they're usually there raping you too. I've had to call in the FBI on them several times, and the National Guard has even had to show its presence in our town before because these vigilante KKK rednecks are so threatening towards anybody who isn't a redneck. They think there's only 2 kinds of people, rednecks and queers. Or whites and blacks. I'm white but they label me a queer, and to them, that's just as bad as being black. So therefore, they beat me and rape me. My mother taught me at a young age to play dead, and I had to do it several times growing up. I also had to play like Brer Rabbit and tell them to please not leave me in the woods or I might die, but it's what I wanted because I was a boy scout and I knew I could survive if they'd just leave me alone and let me live. They even had a hand in killing my mother many years ago, and they also kill anyone who gets close to trying to expose them. You learn to stay away from them and to keep your mouth shut and maybe they'll let you live and find somebody else to rape and abuse. By the way, I'm in southern Alabama, in Washington County, and in surrounding counties it's the same. Besides wanting to be able to have a decent life, I want to get out of this area and be free for the first time in my life. Even while in college and working as an adult, I've encountered more redneck KKK vigilantes, both male and female, always hellbent on killing queers, as they say it. I want to be able to afford to move somewhere else, preferably to Florida or to California, to a place where nobody knows me and maybe I can hide out and start over, and also where people are more accepting of people who choose to not be a redneck. I am tired of being hated for being a perfectly normal human being. I know from college that we are all bisexual creatures and that there is nothing wrong with me. Hell, these rednecks are raping young boys, so they're the queers and child molesters, so why the hell would they be threatening me? The answer is because they want to be free to rape and molest whoever they want and they always get away with it, because this area is full of corrupt police and sheriffs and politicians and wealthy townfolk who can get away with murder repeatedly. I just want out, so please help me to be able to move to a safer environment so that I might live a decent and normal life one day, and so I might also can bring myself out of depression and learn to walk in the sun again and hopefully also find love like I want and not be afraid to feel and express my emotions. I cannot believe that in 2012 they have such control over everyone in the redneck south to the point that people are afraid to live normal lives. And yes, every single word of this is true, so please help. At the rate I'm going, I'll never be able to afford to move elsewhere and to get away from this hellhole called southern Alabama. Even in the last several years, I was near our local river at the boat landing parking lot talking to a friend when the police showed up and started to harass us and called us queers for being two men talking in a parking lot. He then made us stay there and called two friends of his to come there, and while the policeman held a gun on us, they raped me and made me give the two redneck men blow jobs and kept slamming the truck door on my head and punching and kicking me. I did successfully get that policeman moved to another town after I went to the hospital after I was raped, but he wasn't fired. The other two men were never tried for their crimes, but someone did end up murdering one of them. This place is awful, you just have no idea. Another incident I'll tell you about before I end this is one weekend I was working a new part time job on top of my full time job at a maximum security mental hospital. My boss at work, a nurse, had a brother who owned a lake, and he needed someone to take care of general maintenance and help out guests and such. Well to try to me out, they had me stay there one weekend, in my own cabin, with just one guest on the lake, and he was in a cabin down the hill. Well, I found out during the course of this weekend that the nurse and her brother were in the KKK and this man staying at the lake had paid them to be able to hunt him a real life queer at the lake. So he kept harassing me and threatening me and coming to my cabin at night with his guns and even one time chased me down the pier and I had to jump into the lake fully clothed, wallet, shoes, jeans, and all, swimming as deep as I could and moving side to side and spinning underwater because this psycho man was shooting bullets at me! I felt like I was in a movie, and I thankfully didn't get hit but several bullets whizzed by me underwater, and I held my breath and swam clear across the lake underwater and only came up when I had to because I had no breath left, and I had to spend the entire night hiding among the lilypads with my head barely sticking out of the water, for fear that he might see me, even though I was across the lake and there wasn't enough moonlight for him to see me from that far away. I was freezing and sick by the next morning, not to mention having a nervous breakdown after being hunted. My brother and his fiance' got me a lawyer and we were advised by him not to pursue it or they would murder us all. The nurse even admitted to the setup at work the next week, and was surprised that I had shown back up, because she figured I'd have been bagged by the hunter.

I have been on disability for several years now, primarily for bipolar disorder, but also from back and neck injuries sustained from being hit by a drunk driver on new year's eve several years ago. I barely make enough to cover my bills and to buy food to eat, and there is never anything left over, and often there isn't enough, leaving me having to beg for money from friends or family members, who often don't have it and can't give anything. I have been stuck at home for years because I cannot even afford gas to go out in town unless I have to go to the doctor, grocery store, drug store, etc. I do not even want to think about trying to meet a person for a relationship because I feel like I have nothing to offer someone when I can barely take care of myself. Sometimes the despair makes me just want to lie in bed and never get up or swallow a bottle of pills so it will all be over. Living a lonely solitary life is killing me. I have a college degree in psychology and have worked my entire adult life trying to help adults, teenagers, and children to have better lives for themselves, and now I am stuck in the boat where many of them have been, where I feel like there's no hope. I had a lot of problems working also because I live in the southern US where not only racism is rampant (though I'm white), but they also treat people like me the same as they do blacks, and by that I mean people who are bisexual, or open-minded, or who people assume to be gay. I have been fired from jobs, harassed, threatened, passed over for jobs, etc., to the point that years ago I got sick of even trying to work in such a hostile environment when all I ever did was accept everyone and try to help anyone in need. I could never fathom why everybody hated me so much just from general assumptions that I "might" be gay, having never told anyone anything, though I have had relationships with men and women. People here are so anti-gay that it is downright dangerous to make yourself known. They will create vicious lies and rumors to try to destroy your life, will not hire you for jobs, will fire you, threaten and harass you. Further, ever since I was a young boy, I have also been physically abused because of this. White trash rednecks love to do this, and it has been done to me many times-they will kidnap you, drag you off into the woods, tie you to a tree or down in the back of a truck or string you up between two trees, or even act like they're going to hang you, and then they gang rape you, and then they threaten to kill you and your family if you ever tell on them. And you can't go to the police because they're usually there raping you too. I've had to call in the FBI on them several times, and the National Guard has even had to show its presence in our town before because these vigilante KKK rednecks are so threatening towards anybody who isn't a redneck. They think there's only 2 kinds of people, rednecks and queers. Or whites and blacks. I'm white but they label me a queer, and to them, that's just as bad as being black. So therefore, they beat me and rape me. My mother taught me at a young age to play dead, and I had to do it several times growing up. I also had to play like Brer Rabbit and tell them to please not leave me in the woods or I might die, but it's what I wanted because I was a boy scout and I knew I could survive if they'd just leave me alone and let me live. They even had a hand in killing my mother many years ago, and they also kill anyone who gets close to trying to expose them. You learn to stay away from them and to keep your mouth shut and maybe they'll let you live and find somebody else to rape and abuse. By the way, I'm in southern Alabama, in Washington County, and in surrounding counties it's the same. Besides wanting to be able to have a decent life, I want to get out of this area and be free for the first time in my life. Even while in college and working as an adult, I've encountered more redneck KKK vigilantes, both male and female, always hellbent on killing queers, as they say it. I want to be able to afford to move somewhere else, preferably to Florida or to California, to a place where nobody knows me and maybe I can hide out and start over, and also where people are more accepting of people who choose to not be a redneck. I am tired of being hated for being a perfectly normal human being. I know from college that we are all bisexual creatures and that there is nothing wrong with me. Hell, these rednecks are raping young boys, so they're the queers and child molesters, so why the hell would they be threatening me? The answer is because they want to be free to rape and molest whoever they want and they always get away with it, because this area is full of corrupt police and sheriffs and politicians and wealthy townfolk who can get away with murder repeatedly. I just want out, so please help me to be able to move to a safer environment so that I might live a decent and normal life one day, and so I might also can bring myself out of depression and learn to walk in the sun again and hopefully also find love like I want and not be afraid to feel and express my emotions. I cannot believe that in 2012 they have such control over everyone in the redneck south to the point that people are afraid to live normal lives. And yes, every single word of this is true, so please help. At the rate I'm going, I'll never be able to afford to move elsewhere and to get away from this hellhole called southern Alabama. Even in the last several years, I was near our local river at the boat landing parking lot talking to a friend when the police showed up and started to harass us and called us queers for being two men talking in a parking lot. He then made us stay there and called two friends of his to come there, and while the policeman held a gun on us, they raped me and made me give the two redneck men blow jobs and kept slamming the truck door on my head and punching and kicking me. I did successfully get that policeman moved to another town after I went to the hospital after I was raped, but he wasn't fired. The other two men were never tried for their crimes, but someone did end up murdering one of them. This place is awful, you just have no idea. Another incident I'll tell you about before I end this is one weekend I was working a new part time job on top of my full time job at a maximum security mental hospital. My boss at work, a nurse, had a brother who owned a lake, and he needed someone to take care of general maintenance and help out guests and such. Well to try to me out, they had me stay there one weekend, in my own cabin, with just one guest on the lake, and he was in a cabin down the hill. Well, I found out during the course of this weekend that the nurse and her brother were in the KKK and this man staying at the lake had paid them to be able to hunt him a real life queer at the lake. So he kept harassing me and threatening me and coming to my cabin at night with his guns and even one time chased me down the pier and I had to jump into the lake fully clothed, wallet, shoes, jeans, and all, swimming as deep as I could and moving side to side and spinning underwater because this psycho man was shooting bullets at me! I felt like I was in a movie, and I thankfully didn't get hit but several bullets whizzed by me underwater, and I held my breath and swam clear across the lake underwater and only came up when I had to because I had no breath left, and I had to spend the entire night hiding among the lilypads with my head barely sticking out of the water, for fear that he might see me, even though I was across the lake and there wasn't enough moonlight for him to see me from that far away. I was freezing and sick by the next morning, not to mention having a nervous breakdown after being hunted. My brother and his fiance' got me a lawyer and we were advised by him not to pursue it or they would murder us all. The nurse even admitted to the setup at work the next week, and was surprised that I had shown back up, because she figured I'd have been bagged by the hunter.

I have been on disability for several years now, primarily for bipolar disorder, but also from back and neck injuries sustained from being hit by a drunk driver on new year's eve several years ago. I barely make enough to cover my bills and to buy food to eat, and there is never anything left over, and often there isn't enough, leaving me having to beg for money from friends or family members, who often don't have it and can't give anything. I have been stuck at home for years because I cannot even afford gas to go out in town unless I have to go to the doctor, grocery store, drug store, etc. I do not even want to think about trying to meet a person for a relationship because I feel like I have nothing to offer someone when I can barely take care of myself. Sometimes the despair makes me just want to lie in bed and never get up or swallow a bottle of pills so it will all be over. Living a lonely solitary life is killing me. I have a college degree in psychology and have worked my entire adult life trying to help adults, teenagers, and children to have better lives for themselves, and now I am stuck in the boat where many of them have been, where I feel like there's no hope. I had a lot of problems working also because I live in the southern US where not only racism is rampant (though I'm white), but they also treat people like me the same as they do blacks, and by that I mean people who are bisexual, or open-minded, or who people assume to be gay. I have been fired from jobs, harassed, threatened, passed over for jobs, etc., to the point that years ago I got sick of even trying to work in such a hostile environment when all I ever did was accept everyone and try to help anyone in need. I could never fathom why everybody hated me so much just from general assumptions that I "might" be gay, having never told anyone anything, though I have had relationships with men and women. People here are so anti-gay that it is downright dangerous to make yourself known. They will create vicious lies and rumors to try to destroy your life, will not hire you for jobs, will fire you, threaten and harass you. Further, ever since I was a young boy, I have also been physically abused because of this. White trash rednecks love to do this, and it has been done to me many times-they will kidnap you, drag you off into the woods, tie you to a tree or down in the back of a truck or string you up between two trees, or even act like they're going to hang you, and then they gang rape you, and then they threaten to kill you and your family if you ever tell on them. And you can't go to the police because they're usually there raping you too. I've had to call in the FBI on them several times, and the National Guard has even had to show its presence in our town before because these vigilante KKK rednecks are so threatening towards anybody who isn't a redneck. They think there's only 2 kinds of people, rednecks and queers. Or whites and blacks. I'm white but they label me a queer, and to them, that's just as bad as being black. So therefore, they beat me and rape me. My mother taught me at a young age to play dead, and I had to do it several times growing up. I also had to play like Brer Rabbit and tell them to please not leave me in the woods or I might die, but it's what I wanted because I was a boy scout and I knew I could survive if they'd just leave me alone and let me live. They even had a hand in killing my mother many years ago, and they also kill anyone who gets close to trying to expose them. You learn to stay away from them and to keep your mouth shut and maybe they'll let you live and find somebody else to rape and abuse. By the way, I'm in southern Alabama, in Washington County, and in surrounding counties it's the same. Besides wanting to be able to have a decent life, I want to get out of this area and be free for the first time in my life. Even while in college and working as an adult, I've encountered more redneck KKK vigilantes, both male and female, always hellbent on killing queers, as they say it. I want to be able to afford to move somewhere else, preferably to Florida or to California, to a place where nobody knows me and maybe I can hide out and start over, and also where people are more accepting of people who choose to not be a redneck. I am tired of being hated for being a perfectly normal human being. I know from college that we are all bisexual creatures and that there is nothing wrong with me. Hell, these rednecks are raping young boys, so they're the queers and child molesters, so why the hell would they be threatening me? The answer is because they want to be free to rape and molest whoever they want and they always get away with it, because this area is full of corrupt police and sheriffs and politicians and wealthy townfolk who can get away with murder repeatedly. I just want out, so please help me to be able to move to a safer environment so that I might live a decent and normal life one day, and so I might also can bring myself out of depression and learn to walk in the sun again and hopefully also find love like I want and not be afraid to feel and express my emotions. I cannot believe that in 2012 they have such control over everyone in the redneck south to the point that people are afraid to live normal lives. And yes, every single word of this is true, so please help. At the rate I'm going, I'll never be able to afford to move elsewhere and to get away from this hellhole called southern Alabama. Even in the last several years, I was near our local river at the boat landing parking lot talking to a friend when the police showed up and started to harass us and called us queers for being two men talking in a parking lot. He then made us stay there and called two friends of his to come there, and while the policeman held a gun on us, they raped me and made me give the two redneck men blow jobs and kept slamming the truck door on my head and punching and kicking me. I did successfully get that policeman moved to another town after I went to the hospital after I was raped, but he wasn't fired. The other two men were never tried for their crimes, but someone did end up murdering one of them. This place is awful, you just have no idea. Another incident I'll tell you about before I end this is one weekend I was working a new part time job on top of my full time job at a maximum security mental hospital. My boss at work, a nurse, had a brother who owned a lake, and he needed someone to take care of general maintenance and help out guests and such. Well to try to me out, they had me stay there one weekend, in my own cabin, with just one guest on the lake, and he was in a cabin down the hill. Well, I found out during the course of this weekend that the nurse and her brother were in the KKK and this man staying at the lake had paid them to be able to hunt him a real life queer at the lake. So he kept harassing me and threatening me and coming to my cabin at night with his guns and even one time chased me down the pier and I had to jump into the lake fully clothed, wallet, shoes, jeans, and all, swimming as deep as I could and moving side to side and spinning underwater because this psycho men was shooting bullets at me! I felt like I was in a movie, and I thankfully didn't get hit but several bullets whizzed by me underwater, and I held my breath and swam clear across the lake underwater and only came up when I had to because I had no breath left, and I had to spend the entire night hiding among the lilypads with my head barely sticking out of the water, for fear that he might see me, even though I was across the lake and there wasn't enough moonlight for him to see me from that far away. I was freezing and sick by the next morning, not to mention having a nervous breakdown after being hunted. My brother and his fiance' got me a lawyer and we were advised by him not to pursue it or they would murder us all. The nurse even admitted to the setup at work the next week, and was surprised that I had shown back up, because she figured I'd have been bagged by the hunter.

Hi, and thanks for reading my post. I am a mid-thirties guy doing my best to find a long term and stable job after a layoff. while that is obviously a priority, I am also trying to save enough money to attend a very close female friend's wedding in August.
I am in western Illinois, and my friend and her fiance live in eastern California, near Lake Tahoe. Since she relocated there 10 years ago with her then-husband, we have not been able to see each other (although we keep in frequent contact). She and her fiance delayed the wedding partially in hopes to give me enough time to save enough money to travel there and be part of the experience.
My hope is to fly out and spend a few days..preferably a week..but if it came down to it I would take Amtrak or Greyhound. Whatever it took to get there.
I would greatly appreciate any help you could give. This girl is like a sister to me, and having gotten to know her fiance through skype and the phone, he's a great guy as well. Thanks for your time and any donation you may give. God Bless

I'm an alcoholic,I like beers and I just can't go without drinking a beer preferably a 211 steel reserve which cost about $0.85 each.I like the 211 beer because it really makes me feel good and that's the only thing that makes me want to have great sex. So please if you have a few bucks please send it my way so that I can buy me a 4 pack 211.Thank You

I'm an alcoholic,I like beers and I just can't go without drinking a beer preferably a 211 steel reserve which cost about $0.85 each.I like the 211 beer because it really makes me feel good and that's the only thing that makes me want to have great sex. So please if you have a few bucks please send it my way so that I can buy me a 4 pack 211.Thank You

Hey everyone,
My name is Tyler and I am currently an student. I had to move to a new city which tapped out all the money I had saved and I am now behind an entire month on rent. I received a letter from my landlord yesterday informing me that if I don have my rent by Friday morning at the latest ( he said preferably with 48 hours.) That I will be evicted. I live with my girlfriend who is pregnant and neither of us live anywhere near our families. My rent six hundred dollars. I got a job finally but won't be paid for another two weeks and the landlord won't give me that long. Any help at all would greatly help and I am even willing to set arrangements to pay you back in the near future. You can email me at tywade87@hotmail.com for info on how to help. Thank you all for your time and God bless you! Happy holidays everyone.

Ladies, I'm looking for work in Chicago, preferably on public transit lines. I can help cleaning out old junk, and with odd jobs, or just be an extra pair of hands. I am a 46 year old female who is looking to earn extra cash. Feel free to email me if you have any questions. Pay is negotiable.

email shellymielke@yahoo.com
phone 773-303-4139 or leave a message at 773-661-3889

Thanks.
Shelly.

All I want is a chance to prove myself.I live in Anaheim CA.I have extensive experience doing things like 711,Wal-Mart,Pizza Hut,etc.
Unfortunately I was out of work for 2 years because my ID expired when I moved to a new state.It took me 2 years to get my birth certificate from California.Now I have moved back and been trying nonstop for the first 4 months of the year!
It's May now and though I have been on a few interviews there is still no job in sight.
I have several limitations which make it hard to find work:
1.I don't drive.I CAN but since I have no license or car I can't do any job that requires either.
2.I can't speak Spanish.Many of the service industry jobs I used to do,I won't be considered for because I am no bilingual.
3.I have no ability to travel or commute.I have to work in my immediate area because otherwise I would have no way to get back to where I sleep after work.
I am accepting donations of cash,checks,or preferably gift cards to places like Wal-Mart or Target(for clothing,hygiene items,and/or a cheap dispoable phone so potential employers can reach me).Any donation of any amount can be sent to:
Michael Raasveld
General Delivery
Anaheim CA 92803
However what would be of the most help is a job!Any job!I just need a small part time job that would allow me to go back to school.(I have a full scholarship but until I obtain a local ID and can pay the registration fees I cannot even register!I only have one year to go on my degree!)
Are you a manager at a fast food or convenience store franchise?Would you like to help someone who is a good worker get back on their feet?I have someplace I can stay as soon as I can prove I have a job with income no matter how small!And I am even willing to VOLUNTEER!That's right,I will work for FREE to prove my value as an employee!
Please!This is all I can think of to do!You are my last hope!I have been living like this for years now.I just want a chance.
I do not smoke,drink,or do any drugs!I just want a chance.

Invisible Children. Please donate to invisible children preferably on my page and save lives. These children are being abducteda t ages as low as 5 years and forced to hurt rape and kill their peers and their families. they are taught to torch villages and hurt people. Invisible Children will provide rescue radios and rehabilitation for these children. Change a life, save a life, change the world. http://ic.stayclassy.org/member/ic-fundraising?fcid=42222

Invisible Children. Please donate to invisible children preferably on my page and save lives. These children are being abducteda t ages as low as 5 years and forced to hurt rape and kill their peers and their families. they are taught to torch villages and hurt people. Invisible Children will provide rescue radios and rehabilitation for these children. Change a life, save a life, change the world. http://ic.stayclassy.org/member/ic-fundraising?fcid=42222

I have NEVER EVER done this before but I ran across this site and figured I have nothing to loose trying. "Where there is a will there is a way!" Where to start? Sighhh...
I am the sweetest, sensitive, charitable, loving, giving, God Fearing, non judgemental, lover, encourager lady.. Many of my closest friends and family call me an "Angel on earth"... But even Angels need help once in a while.. I'm usually the helper so asking for help is new and a bit hard for me to chew..

First let's start with: My name is Crystal H.. I am a 32 year old caucasion lady that lives in Colorado.. Native to Colorado. Growing up I excelled in school thus earning 4.0 average and constant Honor Roll. I did have College opportunities ect. but at that time I met a young man in college, football player and fell in love. I had a good paying job as an office manager and thought all was good.. It was for several years anyway..We married and At 23yrs. I gave birth to my miriacle baby whom was premature and weighed 2 lbs. 11oz. I was very ill at the end of pregnancy due to acute Eclampsia so she was born early emergency c-cection, flight for lifed to Childrens Hospital in Denver and I stayed in ICU for the first week.. Keep in mind due to circumstances I never was able to see or touch my daughter before they airlifted her to Denver.. Finally one week later my doctor gave me a two hour pass to beable to go to Denver and meet my new daughter for the very first time.. Words can't tell what I felt and the emotions I was feeling.. I still tear up recounting the events.. But yes after many tears, fear of touching or holding her due to her size and all that was hooked up to her I did finally get courageous enough to hold my new born daughter after a week for the first time.. Love at first sight! Chills are still going through my body as I write this.. Anyway's over time she improved and became much stronger. She was small but mighty. I was finally released from the hospital myself and spent all my time with her at Childrens Hospital until release day.. Brought her home at 3 lbs. 12 oz and had the ultimate baby learning/motherly instincts. With 4 yrs. of twice weekly physical therapy she grew out of her challenges, and has grown into an way above average intellence, beautiful nine yr. old.. Thank you God!!!

My next challenges were none to fun at all! My marriage became rocky.. He became abusive physically, emotionally and mentally.. After about the last 3 yrs. becoming so bad and scary I could not deal with his abuse or allow my daughter seeing such activity. So with that said I asked him to leave our home. He would not leave without a police escort, but finally was gone nonetheless.. I am NOT pro divorce at all so after the initial anger callmed down I did go to him asking him to please do counceling with me and let's really try to work this all out. He REFUSED! So after being with my ex husband twelve years we finally did divorce.. =(

Right after the divorce at the age of 30, I was rushed to the ER and diagnosed with Congestive Heart Failure. I was in ICU for over one week and spent several months at home on oxygen. But now since the divorce I was dropped from his insurance so I am unable to have the cardiovascular care needed and a heart valve repaired.. But I have faith one day I will beable to have this delt with.. Gotta believe!

Next was really NOT PLANNED or wanted but happened. I finally met a young man whom I started spending much time with. Due to my heart and lack of insurance I was not on birth control but did use condoms with him. Unfortunately a condom did break and yes I did become pregnant.. Three day's before Christmas last year I misscarried the baby and spent two day's in hospital due to D&C and my heart. I was released at Christmas and had a hard time dealing with the hormones, lack of support from the young man, failure in my parents eyes ect.. Just plain and simple was a hard time for me emotionally but I NEVER once let my daughter know of this and still have not to this day. She does not need to be scared any further than what she has already in life.

Now we come to current events.. Swear I have let my life become a soap opera and should right a what not to do and how to survive book for women.. sighhhhh.... Anyways. After being single for nearly a year and of course wishing I could meet a nice (preferably) Christian boy to date and enter into a relationship with a man whom I have known for several years who was a family friend while I was married came back into my life. This time he showed strong romantic gestures and over time did finally earn some trust n love with me. We entered into a relationship and it felt safe and comfortable since I'd known him so long, family new him and my daughter new him well already too..
I finally started becoming happier and was slowly gaining a little self confidence, and believing that things will end up working out finally afterall.. (Keep in mind due to lack of insurance and Heart Failure I was still not allowed on birth control pills like I wanted) we of course used protection always. But two times the condom came off in me.. I hoped all would be fine and I would not become pregnant, not at all wanting to repeat my first ordeal I had with my daughter plus now with my Congestive Heart Failure on top of it all pregnancy would NOT be good! I went to a local clinic and talked to a female doctor there and begged her if there would be anyway I could qualify for any free birth control that would not hinder my CHF.. Finally I had good news.. =) She said she would see if I could qualify for the low hormone Miranna and if I did she would implant it in my uterous for free.. This was to last for five years.. Yes one positive answered prayer. I went to my doctors oppt. as sheduled, they had me do an UA to make sure I was not pregnant before insertion and preped me for the procedure. Right before the Doctor was to do procedure the nurse came into the room and notified both of us that indeed I was pregnant.. My head swirled with confusion, fear, stress ect.. After talking to my doctor briefly about it, my history ect. I left the office and proceeded to go to my boyfriend to update him of the current events.. At the very beginning he sounded happy and positive, even eased my mind a little but about two day's later he up and left me. I have had my first ultrasound and as of yet the baby is alive and well. Strong heart beat. I am nearly two months pregnant, doctor took me off all my heart meds. due to baby. Still no insurance, applied for Medicade which really saddened me that I was at a point I had to do this.. Very humbling to say the least, and am alone, confused, many urging me to abort the baby but remember I am Christian and this is a hard concept for me to accept.. Currently unemployed, single mother, pregnant, no father support, lonely, desperate and really beginning to feel hopeless.. There is a high probability that the acute Eclampsia could repeat itself again as it did with my daughter and now I'm older than before. Not 23 anymore now I'm 32 with Congestive Heart Failure and Hypertension. Trying to support my nine year old the best I can and now so worried and fearful of what is to come.. Christmas just happened and it so did not feel like Christmas to me. Not much I could do for my daughter or my loved ones. I'm so scared of what the near future holds and how I will beable to deal with it, and be healthy enough to continue taking care of my nine yr. old. Need a good job but kinda feel it would be hard since I am so high risk I have MANY constant dr. visits. Neonatal parnatologist, my OB, and supposed to find a cadiologist as well to monitor me.. Medicade pending but no answer if they would accept me yet, bills piling up, and feeling out of control totally of my life right now.. Sad and confused that bf left me too.. I'm praying sooooo hard daily, nightly, looking on internet for at home jobs I could do but most end up seeming like scams, keep going to church in order to help try to keep me grounded and keep the faith that somehow it will all work out.. I sure hope I have not bored you to death, some may be pretty disgusted by my mistakes and situation, but I do hope nonetheless that maybe even just one person actually found this post, read it through, and maybe just maybe is in a posistion of life that they could and would be willing to help me out a little.. The whole "Pay it forward" campaign.. I fully believe in that and fully believe what goeas around comes around.. Regardless of the outcome I wan't to take a moment to wish everyone that took the time to read my post all the best to you and yours, full love and ENDLESS BLESSINGS to all!

With love and true sencerity,
Crystal H...¢¾


P.S. I don't have a paypal acct. sorry.. If you would like to contact me you may please do so via email at:
chedenskog@yahoo.com Please let me know you are from this site in the subject line so I do not assume you are spam.. Thank you and God Bless...¢¾

So I just got unemployed about 2 weeks ago without notice and had just got kicked out of my house due to some personal conflicts.

Great thing is I've moved into a new place! just signed the lease and what not, but when I found out I lost my job it was not great news to me. Preferably because I had just spent my remaining money in my first month's rent and groceries for the month.

I don't have any money saved up and I need about 300$ for next month's rent.

Good news is, I just got a job, but the problem is I don't start until mid December.

So I need something to get by at the moment.
Anything would be appreciated.

Thanks alot,
Natalie.

I am a cancer survivor with physical disabilities that prevent me from working and living a full life. I am trying to get my health back slowly after the radiation from the cancer treatment nearly destroyed my body and mind. I was forced to move into my mother's garage, where I barely have room to move around. There are so many things I desperately need that most people take for granted. I would deeply appreciate it if anyone could help me with the following:

A new or gently used mattress and box springs, extra firm

A new or gently used microwave preferably with a timer and a clock

Summer clothes size 22-24 or 26-28, winter clothes same sizes

Please contact Lynn at klam46@yahoo.com if you can help. Thank you in advance if you can help in any way and for taking the time to read this.

Lynn in South Central PA Have a great day!!

Hello,I will have a little money to offer for a car.I am a newly divorced single mom on welfare.I am looking for a safe reliable car.Preferably a hatch back, that is Japanese - Toyota ect.The reason I am so specific is because Toyota's never brake down! Also,I would use this vehicle to drive my son, and am a vendor at farmers markets.So I need the room of a hatch back.I have an old 1991 toyota hatch back.However it is beyond repair, and has multiple problems.Every day I am grateful it starts up, though it pours out smoke,cracked windshield,mechanic said there was something wrong with the axel. It just isn't safe.The mechanic said it would last 1 more year if I didn't drive it over 25-30 mph.That was 2.5 years ago.I would like to take it to the junk yard while it is still running,because I am told they will give me $1,000 for it.However this would not be enough to get a better,safer car, just the same quality.It has over 200,000 miles. I would happily give you the $1,000 for your newer(mid,late 1990's - or up with 150,000 ml.or less)safe, reliable (preferably japanese hatch back). I live in San Francisco, so it would have to be near here. My email is lyonshana@yahoo.com Thank you!